2005 Lightspeed Awards!
 

Don't bother submitting nominations, because its completely rigged and Lightspeedcash will win every category again for a record 6th year in a row!

Steve Lightspeed

:thumbsup

You make my cock hard. Does that make me gay? :glugglug

:1orglaugh

very good:thumbsup

That's good to be nominated in every category. :glugglug

I might open some new categories this year, to compete with the other award parties at Internext:

How about these to start:

the "Kissed my ass the most this year" award
the "Paid the most in bribes/kickbacks this year" award
the "Sent the most traffic this year" award
and the highly-coveted

"I fucked up so I need to give him an award this year" award

Steve Lightspeed

oh man, you GOT to add the recently coined


"Best Lightspeed of the Ghetto" award...


:winkwink: :thumbsup :thumbsup

:1orglaugh

Awards are never rigged!

LOL sounds very familiar... Just like :censored

Wait, I got more:

the "you gave me a smokin' deal on hosting this year" award
the "you let me bill with multiple prechecked crosssells this year" award
and the "you let me spam my awards party on your message board" award


shall I continue?

:thumbsup

:1orglaugh Please do!

Steve, you fucking TOLD me I'd win this year when I didn't win last year!

Ok ok... one more just for KK:

the "Kimmykim is gonna kick the shit out of me if I don't honor her with an award" award

or alternatively called:

the "Lightspeed of the Ghetto" award


:1orglaugh

edit: sorry KK, you walked right into that one, I couldn't resist.

I think I'll call yours the "No time to talk to YOU on the telephone" award

Oh my God, can I have a big pink princess phone instead of a trophy?

;-}}}}

hahah classic

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh so true so true :thumbsup

who wins best looking male???

<------------me off course

does this mean I should rip up my acceptance speech ?:Graucho

hey I thought You already have one of those:Graucho

This year's biggest honor will be the

the "Too smart/experienced to get fooled by fake awards" award

I have the feeling you're making fun of my awards.

i want to win the crazy canuck award

D-Money gets the "Thank you, Captain Obvious" award!
But you don't run the only awards party, right?


Steve Lightspeed

oh fuck steve that was plain evil,

i love you guys!

Well, that makes ONE of you.... ask Helmy?

what do i win?

Who, MFM? ;)

:1orglaugh

For those that don't know the history behind the Big Woody Awards, here it is.

When the Players Ball was just starting I went to Sundance with Farrell and the Southpark guys, Matt and Trey.

Farrell and his friends started an event called Lapdance. It was designed as a way to give a platform for them and their friends to get their independant movies seen.

I admired that they built a platform and decided to give the spotlight to those they felt worthy.

When I did the Players Ball, I realized I also had a platform and I too can send any message I want.

So I decided on doing my own awards, making fun of the other awards because they're almost always fixed. I came out and said, it's D$'s Big Woody Awards, I pick them, no fixing!

Lightspeed and I share the same opinions on awards, that's the humor behind the Big Woody Awards. If you don't like the other awards, start your own.

I'm not using Xbiz as an example because I started these way before the XBiz awards. I have no idea how they do their awards and it's none of my business. I've got love for everyone over there.

I even picked a big dick for people to hold, it's funny.