Home Remedies (email spammed to me)
 

HOME REMEDIES



1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of

boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost

instantly removed.



2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting

someone else to hold them while you chop away.



3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply

using the sink.



4. High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a while,

thus reducing the pressure in your arteries..



5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from

rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.



6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be

afraid to cough.



7. Have a bad tooth ache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you will forget

about the tooth ache.



AND..... Sometimes we just need to remember what



The Rules of Life really are:



You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it

should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.



Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.



If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!



And finally... Be really good to your family and friends. You never know

when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.



"Thought for the Day: Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our

heart rather than a piece of our mind".

(The next day)

Oh, I get it! :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh