George Bush resume
 

GEORGE W. BUSH
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, DC 20520


EXPERIENCE AND EDUCATION

Law Enforcement:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under
the influence of alcohol. I pleaded guilty, paid a fine, and had
my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving
record has been "lost" and is not available.

Military:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused
to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use.
By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid
combat duty in Vietnam.

College:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. I was
a cheerleader.


PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:

I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.

I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas in 1975.
I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas.
The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.

I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal
that took land using taxpayer money.

With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry
(including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.


ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:

I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies,
making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. During my
tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden
city in America.

I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of
billions in borrowed money.

I set the record for the most executions by any governor in
American history.

With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my
father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President
after losing by over 500,000 votes.


ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:

I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with
a criminal record.

I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of
*over one billion dollars per week*.

I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S.
Treasury.

I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S.
history.

I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in
any 12-month period.

I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month
period.

I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history
of the U.S. stock market.

In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their
jobs and that trend continues every month.

I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any
administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire,"
Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.

I set the record for most campaign fundraising trips by a U.S.
President.

I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving
the most corporate campaign donations.

One of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest
corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.

My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys
to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my
election decision.

I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against
investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent
investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent
investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.

I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and
refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry
was revealed.

I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history.

I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be
awarded government contracts.

I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than
any President in U.S. history.

I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest
bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.

I've broken more international treaties than any President in
U.S. history.

I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United
Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.

I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.

I refused to allow inspector's access to U.S. "prisoners of war"
detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva
Convention.

I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations
election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).

I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any
President since the advent of television.

I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year
period. After taking off the entire month of August, I presided
over the worst security failure in U.S. history.

I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade
Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most
hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in
world history.

I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to
simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people),
shattering the record for protests against any person in the
history of mankind.

I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked,
preemptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign
nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the
majority of U.S. citizens, and the world community. I have cut
health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty
benefits for active duty troops and their families -- in wartime.

In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for
attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends.

I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans
(71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and
security.

I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster,"
a WMD.

I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden
to justice.

During the Iraq War and Occupation thousands of American troops
were injured and killed. I did not have the time to attend any of
the funerals for our fallen soldiers but I did have the time to
attend more than 43 fundraising events of the Republican party.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:

All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my
father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view.

All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and
my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for
public view.

All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President,
attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and
unavailable for public review.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004

With all those amazing accomplishments, how could you ever think of not voting for dubya :Graucho

Asshahahahaha should cover HIM with a blanket :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh

But what about all the Good things *BEEP* did?

Go 5M posts

haha nice

is this resume true? just asking

We report, you decide. Fair and balanced.

thats a HUGE list


tb

i think we all know bush is evil
do we really need the same shit posted over and over again?

When you try to inform republicans, it is well known that you have to repeat over and over and over and ....

I dont think you can really inform (most of) them, they have their own fantasy land with their own truths.

a pictur e is worth ... many words:

http://www.tvnewslies.org/assets/ima...s/db_Bush5.jpg

GREAT POST!!!



College:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahaha=


A bit more on YALE:

First of all, GW would have NEVER EVER been admitted to Yale had he not had rich parents and connected parents. They only needed to be really rich or connected, they were both.

Second, GW could not receive a grade lower than a "C" according to Yale policy. This means that had he put the same effort into his school work at any other "ordinary" college, he would have flunked out (and he would have done it faster than you can say, "Flunky W").

..................
"gentleman's C" is a phrase that originated at Oxford and Cambridge and meant a "C" grade given to a gentleman for doing very little work in a course. One could not, of course, embarrass a member of the nobility or gentry with a "D" or an "F."
..................

"In George W. Bush's day, the accommodation was called the "Gentleman's C." Those who received it acquired the "gentleman" designation not by virtue of behavior but by birth, and the "C" on their transcripts should never be interpreted as "average" for it usually indicated frequent absences from class, papers from the frat file that had been used two or three times, and blue books that revealed a stunning lack of contact with the course material. What did it matter anyway? These fellows would go on to a life of leisure or, at most, a job title in the family business that required skill with a 7-iron more than the ability to investigate or analyze.

No real harm was done by this system until Karl Rove liked the look of George W. Bush in cowboy boots and decided he could make him President. Now a nation that might have been amused by Bush's "Go Nads!" humor is waking up to the reality of having a "Gentleman's C" president."
..................

I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.

And that is bad? the World Court is in direct conflict to the constitution? Want Europe telling you their Law's? Live in Europe?

Didn't Kerry have a C average at Yale too. Thats what pretty much every site says.

I have not heard that. Which sites do you mean when you say, "every site?"


On another topic:

What ever happened to the love of my life - Laetitia Casta?

Looks like we have an aspiring michael moore in the house...
fuck off dude. no one's gonna buy that shit. its really easy to bring people down than to tell everyone the good side of him.
:BangBang:

Tell me the good side .... you have complete freedom to do it ....

:1orglaugh

Hey you . . . I know you . . . you were the first "comic" kicked off of The Last Comic Standing!


P.S. I found this reference to Kerry's grades on a site that appears to be PRO BUSH:
"Democrats point to Bush's membership in a fraternity, mediocre grade point average and general non-academic pursuits, while Kerry was involved in student government and had high marks."

George Bush is the biggest looser :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

you forgot to attached his Picture hahahaha

http://www.adultoutsourcing.com/gfy/...s_objector.jpg

Haven't found anything good. When I do, I will be sure and post it. Fair and balanced.