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I turned 30 today so I'm giving away a Playstation2 in this thread!
Today is my 30th birthday and because I'm so happy I actually lived to see it, I'm giving away a PS2 in this thread! :thumbsup
Whoever makes me laugh the hardest (joke, funny pic, photochop job, etc) - I don't care what it is as long as it's funny. I'll pick the one that makes me laugh the hardest on Saturday and will send out the PS2 on Monday. I love to laugh so let's go...make me laugh and win a PS2! http://www.acidflyers.com/tv/gifs/rave.gif |
i farted and my cat ran off in a mad panick. Wonder what the fuck is up with that.
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damn u old man :thumbsup
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happy bday
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knock knock....
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ha, happy birthday ya old fart. :winkwink:
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happy birthday
http://imagefort.com/hosted/72zwhm1u...gttmy2t0up.jpg |
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OMG Battuss!!!!!! Where oh where do you find them?? :1orglaugh :1orglaugh
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There is a Grogan picture that will make me laugh my ass off...see you can find it and post it. Hint: Match.com. :1orglaugh |
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.
He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?" |
For the first day on the job they need directions..
http://www.boners.com/content/792018.1.jpg JUICY! http://www.boners.com/content/792006.1.jpg Sunday Special! http://www.boners.com/content/792030.1.jpg |
I was cooking naked the other night, and I went to close the oven door and I caught my dick in it. Didn't burn it, well maybe a little, but it hurt like a bitchy bitch I tell ya. I was like all hoppin' around the kitchen saying "fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fucketty-fuck fucken-fuck...."...... I wonder if any of my neighbours saw through the kitchen window.
"there's that fucking internet guy naked and jumping around his kitchen like a fucking retard. HEY MA! COME AND LOOK AT THIS IDIOT!" At least no one phoned the cops on me. :1orglaugh |
A man meets a women at a bar, and after chatting her up all night, he's finally invited back to her place.
"I should tell you," he says, upon arriving at her apartment, "I'm extremely kinky in the sack." "I am too!" the woman says. "Wait here a minute while I slip into something more comfortable." When she reemerges, the woman is decked out in leather and chains. She has a whip in one hand and a collar in the other, but to her surprise the man is putting on his coat to leave. "Where are you going?" she asks. I thought we were getting kinky." "Lady," the man says, "I just fucked your dog and shit in your purse. I'm outta here!" |
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So a few weeks ago I'm out on the lake in this rowboat fishing. I finally caught this bigass walleye, hauled it in and started to pull the hook out. I'm in my shorts btw, and I'm pulling on the hook with one hand and holding the fish with the other when my hand slipped. The fish's mouth went and clamped down right on my johnson.
They heard an echo across the lake that sounded something like... YEEEAAAOOOWWWFUCKAMAHOOCHIWAWAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! Took me about ten minutes to pry that fucking thing off me, it's teeth were like needles. FUCK!!! A few days later I'm talking to a guy at the local store and he starts telling me there were reports of sasquatch mating calls in the area. |
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Happy birthday! :winkwink:
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Happy B-day, HOA! |
Why are rectal thermometers banned at Auburn University?
They cause too much brain damage. How do you break an Auburn guy's finger? Punch him in the nose. Why did the Auburn student marry the cow? He had to. How can you tell when there's been an Auburn student in your backyard? The garbage is gone and your dog's pregnant. What is the definition of safe sex down at Auburn? Placing a sign on the animals that kick... How do you castrate an Auburn football player? You hit his sister in the jaw. How do you compliment an Auburn fan? Nice tooth. How can you tell your getting close to Auburn? If you stop to take a piss the cows will back up to the fence. What is the definition of an Auburn virgin? An ugly twelve year old who can outrun her brothers |
damn you are "high On Acid" LOL
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How do you get a UF grad off your porch?
Pay for the pizza! :1orglaugh |
happy birthday. its my brothers b-day today too, we'll be getting drunk as hell tonight! Cheers :glugglug
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A professor teaching medicine at the university was tutoring a class on 'Observation'. He took out a jar of yellow-colored liquid. "This," he explained, "is urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observant to color, smell, sight, and taste."
After saying this, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched on in amazement, most, in disgust. But being the good students that they were, the jar was passed, and one by one, they dipped one finger into the jar and then put it into their mouth. After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If any of you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put my 2nd finger into the jar and my 3rd finger into my mouth." Lesson learned! |
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