What's your Favorite Bible Story?
 

I use to be so board in church, that I would look through the Bible for fucked up stories.
There are so many of them.

One of my favorite all time stories was when the 2 angels disguised as travelrs visited Lot in the city of Sodom. If you look in the King James Version...it says...the men of the city came to the door of the house demanding that Lot give up the travelers so they could have sex with them. Lot refused...and sent out his maid servant to them instead. They raped and killed her. Lot then cut her into 12 pieces and sent each of the pieces to the 12 tribes of Isreal as a reminder of what sin does to mankind.

I see a represed version of Diabetic Rage in Exxxotica.

Fuck no! That guy is a Religious Freak!

Im glad Im only related to him by marriage!

Where is Mike Bradley.. Someone call him and bring him here to comment!

<center>I like the part where God yells onto Earth and Says


<h2><center>AND LET THERE BE BONEPRONE
4-LIFE</h2>
God Bless The BONEPRONE FAMILY!



[This message has been edited by boneprone (edited 05-04-2001).]

was that in the Bible? I think it is in the New King Bone Version?

I talked to Mike Bradley earlier, he lost his password and is still searching for it.


Yes Bone...That IS in the Bible!!!!

I always wondered if adam and eve had belly buttons..

I wouldnt think so, but then again...why do men have nipples?

Well if you think about it.. It says that God created man in his own image.. So does God have one? If he does.. Where did he get it from?

I think men got nipples because woman whould look pretty damn funny with 4 nipples.. hehe ...

...unless they had 4 tits....mmmm

Ahh yes.. One for each hand and then the other two for a head rest. Whould be nice but I whouldent want to see a 80 year old with four tits saggin on the ground as she walks away.

My favorite bible story is Samson. The guy screws up big time by telling Delilah his one weakness. The ending rocks because a blind Samson pushes down the pillars.

I also like Noah and the ark...

I like the one where Jesus comes out of the ground and if he sees his shadow we have three more weeks of winter.

I like the temptation of Christ in the desert/wilderness by the Devil. Oh, and Job's story is incredible.

Would you kill your only son if you heard a voice from a burning bush telling you to? yeah, neither would I. I'd go to the psychiatrist first. :)

The one where the jew at the front desk turned away the Virgin Mary.

I'll start with Sodom. The one about cutting the whore into 12 pieces ain't in the Bible, Jewish legend maybe. But the real sin there is likely not homosexuality, but sex magic, attempted communion with angels to get power and secrets from them. If you look in 1 Enoch (not in the Bible) the same thing happens with Noah's flood.

My favorite story is when Jesus saves the adulteress from being stoned. Jesus was cool, he was willing to forgive people for sinning and he was killed for speaking out against religious authorities of his day.

That's my :2 cents:

David and Goliath, which is why its always better to be friendly. I also like the Jesus helping Mary, it is sad that there are so many judgemental christians. Too bad they dont know they are going to hell...kidding

"The End"

I like the one where Jesus was in the WWF in a 2 on 1 match against Hulk Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior.

i like the story in Revelation 12:24 where the idiots didn't respond to 2 year old threads

Leviticus 20:13

when the jews convince a race to all get circumcized and then while they're all screaming in pain over the operation they decide to just kill them all.

You must have QUOTED THE BIBLE WRONG. Lot existed before the 12 tribes of Israel were even born. Abraham fathered Isaac who fathered Jacob who became Israel. Israel then had the 12 tribes. LOT was NOT the contemporary of the 12 tribes so there's no way what you quoted would square with biblical genealogy.

What you were referring to was from the book of Judges when Benjaminites (tribe of Benjamin) so mistreated a father's daughter than he cut her up in pieces and sent them to the other tribes.

The resulting slaughter was so great that the High Priest were worries that the tribe of Benjamin would become extinct.