im high, say a funny joke
 

ill wait here

me penis is on fire

whats black white and red all over..


a battered wife :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh

I can say it but will you hear it? :winkwink: Sorry, I had to.

I'm gonna go and sit on the pot. I'll read a few jokes from the back of FHM for ya.

yes...
I need some porn limericks for my blog...

or as the BB5 crew call them:

PORNetry....

~Bell

?? how'd you know im deaf? i never told anyone

Yesterday, my grandma asked me to change her diaper because it was smelly and something was moving inside the diaper.

I accepted because she's my grandma.

Inside the diaper, it was infested with tiny brown worms. And the smell was just horrible.

What's even worse, is that at the same moment, she had an horrible explosive diarrhea. I received everything on my face. All the diarrhea and the brown worms were inside my eyes, mouth and nose..

that post is useless without pics :Graucho

:1orglaugh

lol

ohh shit this is not funny this is gross

One day there was a blind man walking down the street and he smelled oranges, so he bought some fruit.
He smelled some pastries, so he bought some donuts.

Then he walked passed a fish market, took a hard sniff, and said, "Hello ladies!"

Three men were trekking through the desert and came across a magician. The magician was standing at the top of a slide. The magician than said, ''You may each go down the slide, asking for a drink. When you reach the bottom of the slide you shall land a a huge glass of that drink.
The first man went down yelling, ''Beerrr!!!'' Plop! He landed in a glass of beer.

The second guy went down the slide yelling,''lemonadeee!!!'' Plop! He landed in a glass of lemonade.

The third guy went down the slide yelling ''wheeeeeeeee!!!'''

What is 40 feet long and smells like urine?
Line dancing at the nursing home.

What is a 6.9?
A 69 interupted by a period.

nice :repuke

One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems fine, but after awhile she slowly starts to lean over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately rush up to catch her and straighten her up. Again she seems fine, but after awhile she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back and once more bring her back upright. This goes on all morning. Later the family arrives to see how the old woman is adjusting to her new home. "So, Ma, how is it here? Are they treating you all right?" they ask. "It's pretty nice," she replies. "Except they won't let you fart."

There is a boy that just get´s his drivers license on his 16th birthday, so he asks his dad "Dad will you buy me a car?".
The father replies "Does your dick wipes your asshole son?" He says no and tries again on his 17th. Again the father asks "Does your dick wipes your asshole?" Again he has to refuse.
Finally on his 18th birthday he goes to his father and asks for the car again.
His dad asks as the years before "Does your dick wipes your asshole son?".
Proud he replies "YES he does!!!"
Father:"THEN GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!"

The other night I walked into a bar, got a beer and sat down in front of the window next to a guy who was crying. I figured I would try to cheer him up a little, so I asked him why he was crying.


He said, "Look out that window. Do you see all of those streets out there? I built them, all of them, with my bare hands. But do they call me 'BOB - The Street Builder?' no..."


"Now, look out that window. Do you see those docks, down on the river? I built them, all of them, with my bare hands. But do they call me 'BOB - The Dock Builder?' no..."


"And over there. Do you see that beautiful neighborhood? All those wonderful houses? I built those too. All of them, with my bare hands. But do they call me 'BOB - The Home Builder?' no...


"BUT YOU FUCK ONE GOAT!!!"