Dictionary For Decoding Women's Personal Ads
 

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

> > 40-ish.............................................49
> >
> > Adventurous.................Slept with everyone
> >
> > Athletic......................................No tits
> >
> > Average looking....................Moooo
> >
> > Beautiful..........................Pathological liar
> >
> > Emotionally Secure......................On medication
> >
> > Feminist.......................................... Fat
> >
> > Free spirit....................................Junkie
> >
> > Friendship first..........................Former slut
> > >
> > New-Age..............Body hair in the wrong places
> >
> > Old-fashioned.............................No BJs
> >
> > Open-minded.................................Desperate
> >
> > Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing
> >
> > Professional....................................Bi tch
> >
> > Voluptuous...................................Very Fat
> >
> > Large frame.................................Hugely Fat
> >
> > Wants Soul mate...............................Stalker

haha athletic no tits...amen

Hahahaha, so true :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh

hahahhaa :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

So true~!

:1orglaugh funny yet true

So what you're saying is that I should look for the open minded ones?

I like athletic open-minded soulmate seekers.

Nice! :1orglaugh

hehehehe. :winkwink:

hey now, not all of us athletic types have small tits. :Graucho

I have a different version. Someone sent me this 4 or 5 years ago and I've always kept it because I thought it was so funny.



Womens personal ads:
(HOW TO INTERPRET THEM)

40-ish. . . 48.

Adventurous... has had more partners than you ever will.

Athletic... flat-chested.

Average looking... ugly.

Beautiful... pathological liar.

Contagious smile... bring your penicillin.

Educated... college dropout.

Emotionally secure... medicated.

Feminist... fat ball-buster.

Free spirit. . . substance user.

Friendship first. . . trying to live down a reputation as a slut.

Fun... annoying.

Gentle... comatose.

Good listener... borderline autistic.

New-age... all body hair, all the time.

Old-fashioned ... lights out, missionary position only.

Open-minded... desperate.

Outgoing. . . loud.

Passionate. . . loud.

Poet... depressive schizophrenic.

Redhead... shops in the Clairol section.

Rubenesque... grossly fat.

Romantic. . . looks better by candlelight.

Voluptuous... very fat.

Weight proportional to height... hugely fat.

Wants soul mate... one step away from stalking.

Widow... nagged first husband to death.

Young at heart... toothless crone.