Dead babies, geeeet your dead babies here!
 

Q: What's blue and sits in the corner?
A: A baby in a baggie.

Q: What sits in the kitchen and keeps getting smaller and

smaller?
A: A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler!

Q: What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor?
A: An erection.

Q: Why did the baby fall off the swing?
A: Because it had no arms or legs.

Q: Why do babies have a soft spot in their heads?
A: So you can pick them up five at a time.

Q: What's blue and orange and lies at the bottom of a swimming

pool?
A: A baby with burst armbands.

Q: How do you make a dead baby float?
A: Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby.

Q: What's 18 inches long and makes women scream all night ?
A: Crib death.

Q: How do you stop a baby from choking?
A: Take your dick out of its mouth.

Q: What's red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before

exploding?
A: A baby in a microwave.

Q: When is the best time to bury that baby you killed?
A: When it starts talking to you again.

Q: How many babies does it take to make a bottle of baby oil?
A: It depends on how hard you squeeze them.

Q: What's more fun than stapling babies to a wall?
A: Ripping them off again.

Q: What do you call a dead baby with its skin peeled off?
A: Sexy.

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby?
A: A dead baby in a clown costume!

Q: What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A: A baby with a punctured lung.

Q: Why did the Baby fall out of the Tree?
A: Because he was DEAD!

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and an onion.
A: You don't cry when you chop up a dead baby.

Q: What has 4 legs and one arm?
A: A Doberman in a children's playground!

Q: What does a baby and a Pinto have in common?
A: They're fun to ride until they die.

Q: What do you get whan you dislocate a dead baby's jaw?
A: Deep Throat.

Q: What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender?
A: Hold on. I'll tell you in a second.

Q: What is better than a dead baby?
A: The revoked child-support.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a grandmother?
A: Grandmothers dont die when you fuck them in the ass

Q: Why didn't they crucify baby jesus?
A: I dont know why they didn't either.

Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls

and a truck full of dead babies?
A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a

pitchfork.

Q: What's the worst thing about fucking a dead baby?
A: Wiping the blood stains off of your clown suit!

Q: What's the difference between a bucket of gravel and a

bucket of baby guts?
A: You can't gargle gravel.

Q: Why do you stick a baby in the blender feet first?
A: So you can see the expression on its face!

Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A: A baby playing in a plastic bag.

Q: How do you spoil a baby?
A: Leave it out in the sun.

Q: Why did the toddler drop it's lollypop?
A: It was hit by a truck...

Q: What's red, screams and goes around in circles?
A: A baby with its foot nailed to the floor.

Q: What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead

babies?
A: I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house?
A: Depends how hard you throw them.

this is sick. sick, sick, sick. i hope to god youre infertile and never gonna have a baby. sick fuckin asshole.

I couldnt agree more

That is without a doubt the most comprehensive list of dead baby jokes I've ever seen.

i've got something to say.

i killed your baby today.

and it doesn't matter much to me,

as long as it's dead.

here is one that i made up:

what is the difference between a dead baby and a bath tub?

YOU CAN'T EAT A BATH TUB!

sorry smit, sit your ass in the corner, that wasnt funny:(

I am ashamed of myself for reading and laughing at those. :(

You are sick man... You are sick...
Don't joke with something like that cuz you've been a baby too once...

Heard this one back in high school, only it was told different....


What's easier to unload, a truckload of bricks or a truckload of dead babies?

A: the truckload of dead babies, you can use a pitchfork.




I had sick friends.