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-   -   George Carlin: THE BAD AMERICAN (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=300449)

MuleScrote 05-23-2004 07:16 PM

George Carlin: THE BAD AMERICAN
 
I think this email flew all over the place, so maybe you've seen it already....but I thought I would share anyway:


YES, I'M A BAD AMERICAN
by George Carlin


I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid level governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican!

I'm in touch with my feelings and I like it that way, damn it!

I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart American.

I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.

I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, try to do it in English.

I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy ass through 4 years plus, of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.

I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.

My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled Jerry Springer.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.

I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.

I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I'm freezing my ass off during these long winters and paying, paying, paying?

I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years In the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut-the-Hell-up already.

I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson practices, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the problem and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one?

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them.

I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you're breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.

I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.

I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me crap or trying to guilt me into making "donations" to their cause. These people should be targets.

I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.

And what the hell is going on with gas prices... again?

If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.

eroswebmaster 05-23-2004 07:19 PM

George Carlin used to be funny...now he's just a cranky old fart.

MuleScrote 05-23-2004 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by eroswebmaster
George Carlin used to be funny...now he's just a cranky old fart.

Yeah, kinda went downhill back when he decided to clean up. But he can still be entertaining.

nathan_f 05-23-2004 07:21 PM

I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years In the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut-the-Hell-up already.

best line ever.

Superterrorizer 05-23-2004 07:23 PM

That's not George Carlin. I saw him a few months ago and he is as funny, if not funnier than he has ever been.

http://www.georgecarlin.com/georgeca...dontblame.html

MrJackMeHoff 05-23-2004 07:25 PM

What!? You naysayers. George is still the shit.

SpaceAce 05-23-2004 07:26 PM

That's not George Carlin, doesn't sound anything like him.

Edit: Nope, not Carlin: http://www.snopes.com/language/document/carlin.htm

SpaceAce

Slick 05-23-2004 07:26 PM

He's gonna be in Green Bay which is about 4 hours from here in September, I'm DEFINATELY gonna try to make it down to see him.

MuleScrote 05-23-2004 07:31 PM

So it's not Carlin....but still good.



I can remember one of his old HBO special when I was a kid. I loved his airline safety speech.

:thumbsup

smokingdawn 05-23-2004 07:47 PM

I love it!

WebTitan 05-23-2004 08:09 PM

george rocks :thumbsup

EZRhino 05-23-2004 10:17 PM

:1orglaugh

count blingula 05-23-2004 10:19 PM

go mr. carlin:1orglaugh

EviLGuY 05-23-2004 11:24 PM

Whoever wrote it has some good points. :2 cents:

Firehorse 05-24-2004 10:50 AM

Food for thought! :Graucho


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