Things I wonder about
 

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever the hell comes out!"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt"

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?


If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

What do you call male ballerinas?

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?


Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

Does the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you try singing the two songs above?


Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?


Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster? On the same note, does pushing the cross walk button more than once change the light faster?


:2 cents:

welcome to the middle of last... oh fuck it.
you're late.

HAHA

Still funny tho...

Too cold, light bulb will break. I tried, seriously. :winkwink:

didnt i just read this in another thread?

On a serious note though, you really have to wonder:

1)Who invented beer: drink yeast shit and it gets you drunk.
2)Who invented bread: again with the yeast

I mean, were yeast just wandering around in giant blobs in prehistoric days so we accidentally stumbled across the 2 most fundamental processes of rising dough and fermentation?

Crazy...

"Its sounds, smells feelings etc. If you have no concept of light or shape, you cannot have dreams in that form.

If someone has been totally blind since birth, they only have auditory dreams."

-- google

I don't care how old it is, it's still funny.

:glugglug

I still love it ........:1orglaugh

uhm. Moron. I used to work in a sub-zero meat packing plant, and we had lights in there.

LOL... you got me on that one!

don't have the answers to all of them, but here's a few...

some people like food burnt. I like bacon to be burnt to death.

I have a light in my freezer....

no... carpool lane usually requires three or more.


no sealer to make it waterproof.

to reinforce the reasoning behind bothering someone for the time by illustrating they have either forgotten their watch or simply don't own one... the bathroom question is usually indicated by doing the pee dance rather than pointing. Different body language for different things.

Decency and professionalism. It's not a strip show.

who cares... it's a stupid cartoon.



1. of course. Do you need your eyes open to dream?
2. of course. They are still human.


would negate the need for one of the most popular running cartoons in history now wouldn't it.

analytical.

I'm sure the ingredients are listed on the back of the bottle.

no.

the mouse just works there... he doesn't operate it.

yes

to provide you with an answer to the last dumb question.


in terms of eating it, I would venture to say yes... in terms of reading it, probably not.


wouldn't you get pissed if some guy was blowing his smelly fucking breath in YOUR face? Even dogs like fresh air. You want some guy blowing in your face in place of the wind from say, a rollercoaster? Not really the same thing are they.

no, and no.

if you sing twinkle twinkle little star and then play it backwards you actually say "i hate allah"

spoooky