GFY Dream Team of Ineptitude.
 

If you can't do something well, learn to enjoy doing it poorly.


If you have a few weeks and a few bucks in your pocket, and you want to completely destroy a new project and lose your money -

who would you choose for design, hosting, content, traffic etc . . . what's the best way not to succeed?

hosting and traffic.. u can get a crazy rip off deal with $$$ overusage and have crappy korean chinese trafic.