hahaha, I love The Onion
 

Tortured Ugandan Political Prisoner
Wishes Uganda Had Oil

KAMPALA, UGANDA?A day after having his hands amputated by soldiers backing President Yoweri Museveni's brutal regime, Ugandan political prisoner Otobo Ankole expressed regret Monday over Uganda's lack of oil reserves. "I dream of the U.S. one day fighting for the liberation of the oppressed Ugandan people," said Ankole as he nursed his bloody stumps. "But, alas, our number-one natural resource is sugar cane." Ankole, whose wife, parents, and five children were among the 4,000 slaughtered in Uganda's ethnic killings of 2002, then bowed his head and said a prayer for petroleum.

http://www.theonion.com

sad :(

but funny at teh same time

Tell him to call the crooked UN, they're supposed to be taking care
of it.

:glugglug