I'm a SICK fuck
 

I have flu.
What the hell.. it's soon summer, it's warm outside (almost t-shirt weather), and I got the fucking flu!?
Unfair. I have a HUGE HUGE amount of work to do, and now I'm sick.. fuck me.
:ak47: germs.

SARS???

hmm

Yes. I'll give Boneprone all my sites in my will. Dunno why. If you don't hear from me in 6 months, assume I'm dead.

Laptop + Bed = :glugglug

Currently doing that. Do you have any idea how hard it is to design while laying in bed?
..and how time consuming? This has been one of the worst days of my career, productivitywise.

Don't joke about that!

Thats for sure, my wife was quarentined for 8 hours yesterday while being tested for SARS. Scary shit. Luckily she's ok.

my cure for all evils is pure "real" lemon juice..havent had a cold or flu in many many many years...just take about 3 shots a day with some honey or sugar...kills it all.

:GFYBand

Bye bye teeth! :)

This is honestly my tried and true flu remedy...A Flu is a virus. So most medications only allieve the symptoms.

Most Flu virii...according to my theory...live in the blood or I may have learned that...so the best way to kill them is to make the blood a very inhospitable place.

OK...first get your warmest comfiest sweats out...thermal underwear works well too.

Get all your warmest blankets and add them to your bed.

Get some honey, lemon juice, and a cough drop or two and put some of each into a tall glass of hot tea. Keep it hot and let them dissolve.

Get a few shots lined up of whiskey or brandy or vodka or tequila...something hard. I prefer whiskey or brandy.

Dice some garlic reallly fine. Let it sit. The beneficial properties of garlic are most potent when you've exposed as much of the clove to air...hence the fine dicing.

Get a glass of water and add some curry powder, cayenne pepper, tabasco, rooster sauce, basically as much hotsauce as you can stand. Then add a little more...

ok...take a piss and a shit...

get your laptop battery charged and ready...all your music, dvd's, games, work, whatever close to your bed...a tall glass of water would be good too.

Jerk off.

take a mild sleeping pill or some flu medicine.

Add the garlic to the hotsauce mixture, drink as much as you can...you won't get far...so take a shot of alchohol and sip some tea...wash it down with warm water. Continue doing this until you finish all the hotsauce/garlic mix, all the alchohol, and all the tea.

Then jump in your bed and pull most of the covers on top of you...relax, try not to barf and begin entertaining yourself. You're going to sweat like there is no tomorrow. When you start to sweat, pull more covers on top of you...STAY IN BED.

You will sweat like a dancing mule for hours...your blood will be so boiled and polluted with things that are actually good for you but bad for virii. You will wake up the next day feeling 110% better I guarantee. You will stink to high heaven, your room will reak, your bed will stink, your breath will peal paint, your farts will kill small animals, and possibly burn a bit...but you will feel sooooo much better.

I dare you to try it...you'll be converted. It is a method I've used for years and it works.

However don't do this if its a stomach flu...it will aggravate any vomiting or diarea...in case you hadn't guessed.

Hoax, thats great man, I'll have to try that....I mean the part about jerking off. :1orglaugh