I would never refer a mainstream client to GFY members
 

One of my close offline business associates asked me if I knew a good web marketing guy for his mainstream company, some wholesale food distributor or some shit. He's a burly chap, originally from NY, still has that grimy NY accent. Smokes the stogies and sounds like a 70's wiseguy. But being 62, doesn't know shit about computers. I tell him, sure, I know a couple of marketing guys, perfect for what he's looking for.

Below is the phone conversation.

Lou: Hey Robby boy, you got any good marketing guys? You know, the nerd ones, computer marketing and shit. My daughter tells me I need more computer advertising on this Google.

Me: Lou, hey buddy, yeah man. As a matter of fact, I visit a forum where a lot of them hang out and bullshit. (at this point he's thinking "forum" means a coffee shop where we all mingle offline, drink espresso, and discuss web nerd shit)

Lou: That's my boy, Robby. I'll shoot you over a little bonus if they work out and get the job done. That's whatcha gotta do kid, you gotta grease those palms that feed ya.

Me: Thanks man, but it's not necessary. Just be cautious, some of these people will rip you off faster than Barbaro ended his attempt at the Triple Crown.

Lou: Too soon, Robby, too soon. Still hurt'n from the couple grand on that break. But aye, Robby, you're a good guy. I'll send ya over something. You have these people call me, or I call them? What? We email or text message shit? How does this work?

Me: I'll have them contact you via email. I'll tell them to let you know that Rob from Go Fuck Yourself sent them.

Lou: Go fuck, go, go fuck yourself? Who you talk'n to, pal? This some kinda fucking joke to you? I was honestly looking for your help and you waste my time and tell me to go fuck myself.

Me: No, no, no...Lou, they're from Go Fuck Yourself!

Lou: Now you wanna play fucking games? Do you know any computer marketing people or are you gonna continue to waste my time?

Me: Yes! LOL! That's what I'm trying to tell you. They're the geeky web marketing guys you need. I know them from my forum.

Lou: OK, so it's one of those online fellas. Where did you say you knew them from again? A forum?

Me: Yes, GoFuckYouself.com

Lou: Ah you mother fucker, you! Know you wanna be smart?!? That's it, I've had enough. I'm grabbing my .45 and I'll see you in a couple minutes you mother fucker! Go fuck myself? Go fuck myself? I'll show you who's gonna get fucked.

Me: Lou? Lou? Lou?????

Lou: <dead air>

Me: Oh shit! This is why I don't fucking give mainstream referrals from GFY!

i understand that

Didn't read.

P.S. This story is 100% absolutely fictitious. I was bored, wanted to write a funny joke to cheer myself up for, thanks to many of you fine purveyors of great advice, made me think I had 24 hours to live last night.

this makes me worry for your health even more than the stroke thread :winkwink:





ps glad you took the advice in the other thread and got yourself checked out :thumbsup

..good thing I didn't read all that then..:1orglaugh

i've actually had conversations like this with newer webmasters over the years. I usually have to put in parenthesis (yes that is the name of the forum!) just so they don't think i'm blowing them off haha

Did everything suddenly go black and silent for a bit?

LOL Agree.