More Key Employees leave Lightspeed
 

Lightspeed Cash is sad to announce the departure of Tom the Culligan Man and Helga and Bella the housecleaners. No longer will those who visit the Lightspeed offices be able to enjoy clean sparkling water from Tom. No longer will they be able to see out the windows that were once washed by Helga or walk upon the clean carpet that was vaccumed by Bella.
We are sad to see them go and will miss them deeply.
We are proud to say that we were able to negotiate with Joe the pool guy and Sam the Orkin man and they WILL be staying! Hooray!

When will the revolving door at Lightspeed end?
Will YOU be next?
Will Luke Ford report YOUR career move?
Will anyone care?
Will Michael Jackson pay to have a Voodoo Curse put on you?
Beware!

The title of this thread should have read "Lightspeed Cleans His Own House!"

Nothing worse than getting rug burns on a dirty carpet !:1orglaugh

I'll post pics of Lightspeed in a French Maid outfit soon :thumbsup

Dude I thought you guys got kicked out of that house. You're losing more than employees these days ;)

Helga will certainly be missed by me. She was a real ASSet to you company.

From what i remember of your house where you work from... I could see a nice Toga party going on there... "animal house style" for all your top 25 webmaster.... hehe 50 kegs and 25 crack whores.... LMAO AZ has the best weather in the states... :winkwink:

HAHAHHAHA....will the madness never end? :1orglaugh

Damn, I just got a call from John my hair stylist -- he's moving out of town and won't be able to cut my hair anymore. Another KEY LOSS for LIGHTSPEED!

I've heard of bloodletting, but this is ridiculous!

what about Brown the UPS man?

Outside Contractor..

Lightspeed will you hire me?

hey, there's an idea for a new site

As we all know Lightspeed needs a GOOD haircut , BADLY , lets take up a collection !! Almost happened in Jamaica ! http://www.fubarwebmastersadventures...e/P2080326.JPG

Hah, that picture must be someone feeling the hole in Steve's head... hehehe

I want Lightspeed to buy me a Yamaha R6

if you're interested, I'll send ya my wire info

Nothing like a good Jamaica Phrenologist to help figure out a troubled mind :thumbsup

Hair stylist?

Buahaha!

Hire me. I'll vacuum naked.. or something.

ok which one .......vacuum naked??.........or something?
Btw how many psi suction can we count on?:Graucho

i hope helga will come work for us, My boss only cleans up if he has a new girl coming over. And now that he has a steady girlfriend we wont be seeing cleanlyness for quite awhile.

Steve have no fear I will set you up with a hair cut just like mine. When I'm at the "Phoenix Forum - Bash" No worries about John all you need is a Mach III.

Please do :Graucho

I think your affiliate webmasters are the most important employees at lightspeed.

No Lightspeedcash without them...

What about the dildo cleaner? Is she gone too? I know that big green one needed a washing. :1orglaugh

Dildos need cleaning? OK.. I have two possible responses:

1) Huh? Really? I thought all you had to do was dip them back in and everything was all better????

2) Big green one? Um... sounds like something that would come out of a nose, not go up a vagina!

What about the lawn mower guy?

The lawn guy is loyal as a dog -- he knows which side of the fence really has the greener grass. (oh a pun, i'm on a roll!)

I hear that turd is going to be the next Lightspeed Girl.
We expect turd to be such a hit that we may be able to hire Tom, Bella, and Helga back!
http://www.boobiebucks.com/boardstuff/turd4.jpg

Nice damage control spin :-)))

I hope this is all a GFY drama.

How is the fight with Acacia going Steve?

We all have to support the guys fighting, because while they are shelling out money to lawyers for all our benefits, some rats who took the easy route are laughing at us.

Stop sending money to the rats and support the fighters.

Steve get Richard to contact me I just decided you are no longer allowed to buy content from us.

IT'S FREE TO YOU.

:thumbsup

Well I'd say you can hire me.. but I think someone would get a little upset about that. Maybe he'll share me with you? I wanna be cool too. I don't vaccuum though.

Yeah, but does he mind all the smelly parts in between? If so, I might have to hire him out from under you!

Always good to use humor to "spin" with.

especially in a 9 month old thread :1orglaugh

Will someone at Lightspeed hire me?

I haven't been let go in a while!
Forgot what it's like :-))

it's not any fun till lightspeed starts hiring people specifically to fire them :Graucho

FUCK!

Lightspeed just canned me too.


Fine you bastards, I'm sure someone else needs me to do as much nothing as I did for you.

But RAM will still run around in LS Gear....YOU BET :thumbsup

Losing employees is hard on any company :helpme

This is hilarious shit. Great advertising for Lightspeedcash, by the way!!! Very selective program--you have to have references to join their PPS. I agree--smart way to do business, weeds out cheaters, and also increases ROI--you only recruit semi- or proven webmasters. Best of luck to Lightspeedcash.

now i can't get an image of steve with dreads like dugmor out of my head

Ram, no matter what, you know we still love ya brah!

you call that gear?

whats up cole?

:)))