Is it harder for adults to make friends?
 

When I was a teenager, I could make friends very quickly. I had a ton of friends. We were a family.

As I've gotten older (mid-twenties, not Old), and moved to new places, it's been much harder to make new friends.

Anyone else experienced this?

high school was fairly easy to make friends. elementary and juinior high was even easier. college you can make friends, but after that its a bit more difficult. usually work or other activities is how you meet new people to hang out with. if you work from home and by yourself, it would be tough to meet new friends imo.

and i'd like that girl in the ultimate feeds banner to be my friend :thumbsup

I do indeed work at home. That is certainly part of it. But I also notice that while I have plenty of acquaintances, I haven't made any close friends.

Yup... in highschool, had tons of friends. University I went out of province and made some friends but nothing long lasting (ie: I don't keep in touch with many people I met in University). Now I work out of my office in a town where most of my university friends moved out so its extremely hard I find to make friends. Especially close friends.

WG

Hook up with other webmasters in your area.

There aren't many. Plus, after hanging around on GFY, I am not sure I want to be friends with a bunch of porn people! :helpme

I agree... I've been working at home for almost 3 yrs and I moved to a new area... my friends come from my gym, bowling and girls that I meet, but they'll never be as close as the friends you grow up with. Even though I'm alway from my close friends, I speak with them daily thru aol and shit like that

as a kid i had no friends. literally. i was alone 24/7.

as an adult, i meet a lot of people... know everyone... tons of cute boys, tons of webmasters, tons of everyone... but at the end of the day when i wanna go see a movie... theres no one to call.

but i digress... so, to answer ur question... based on what ive seen, its probly easier as a kid. most kids make friends & get along with anyone, because they are not jaded by the world we live in. :2 cents:

lol.. that's a typical Gothweb post :thumbsup

Maybe I was just a cooler teenager than I am a young adult.

I've always been like this.

No offense, but maybe its that attitude thats keeps you from meeting new people. Just a reality check, you are one of the porn people. You will probably meet people exactly like you in this biz that you will get along with great.

Me on the other hand don't know anyone from this biz, as I'm only 19 and I hang out with people I went to school with.

I think so since as we get older people get ALOT more set in their ways, beliefs, etc.

Also, mostly, I believe that you dont have as much time to chill out anymore as you get more and more committed, Marriage, kids, house, biz... Before you know it, you have just a few minutes to hang to yourself.

I am lucky enough to have a friend that even though we dont see each other all that often, when we do, its like we just saw each other the day before, and catch up.

Enjoy the friends you have, you never know when the last time you see someone will be.

Herb K

That was me kidding. I have made a number of online friends in this industry, though most of them before I found this particular den on iniquity.

I know :thumbsup

It's nice to have people like you, who understand me. I am gonna get all choked-up.

Its not easy making friends as you get older I think...cliches are already made...people have their close friends by now you know...

sure you can make friends...I do, but its harder when people are still with their best buds from elementary, high school or college.

Hehe keep trying you're a winner :Graucho

This is the saddest I've ever felt about being told I am right about something on this board. Apparently, it is tough, and I am screwed. :1orglaugh

Yeah, and get's even slower in your 30's. Many reasons for this, one being work, work, work, when you're a teenager all you care about is pussy and you go out with your buddies looking for it and essentially anyone looking for pussy is your buddy. As you get older you've had some pussy taken by some of these 'friends' so a natural reluctance sets in.

About meeting 'porn people' you'd be surprised really, online communication is not real, can you imagine a group with 10 guys talking to each other using names like loser, ass and fuck yourself all the time, they would kill each other, alot of people put up totally different front or are just influenced by this limited communication medium, in the absense of reassuring smiles and body language you can't help but feel everyone's flaming you and then people pre-emptively turn asshole mode.

That's my :2 cents:

But you'll go on making new friends untill you die, don't worry..

That makes me sound a little more hopeful... Though if it only gets slower from here, I dunno. Ah well.

I will say that most of the friends I made when I was a teenager, or any other time, we girls. Most of them weren't looking for pussy with me.

I have no "friends"


my last "friend" stormed out about 2 months ago when I told her I didn't want to be "friends".....



God it hurts inside.......



hold me.......

It's nice not to be the only loser. Your pain has really cheered me up.

Hmm. Can't say that I really have this problem. I still have a bunch of friends from my old high school (including my girlfriend), but I've made quite a few friends after that.
The type of friendship changes though, my old friends I mostly drink with, my newer friends I talk about politics. culture, ethics etc with.

Fucker! :winkwink:

its harder as an adult because everyone is into their lives and already have their own interests and are less likely to explore new ones

Head down to the nearest homeless shelter. Bring along a few bottles of MadDog 20/20, and you'll have a bunch of instant friends for life :thumbsup

This is Yorkshire. The public fountains run with lager.

Definetley !! I have zero friends
ICQ me if your in my local area Vancouver, BC (not joking)
137469529
*sigh i'm desperate *
oh well who cares

I've tried to be friends with pam anderson, but hell, it is fuckin hard :)

This is a sad day for me. Posting about stuff like this in GFY.

As you get older and have kids you get a whole new group of friends, usually tied through the school your kid goes to.

Most all my friends are people I met through business networking.

Have a couple I keep in touch with from years back.

Also as you get more successful your friends most always change cause they can't keep up with your lifestyle.

I think it is easier when you're younger.

For instance, I have a son who will be 5 next month. I take him to the park, there's a little girl there, he runs up to her and says "I'll be spiderman and you'll be catwoman and we'll go get the bad guys"
Off she goes with him and they play for hours.

Unfortunately when I approach this kids mother and offer to be Tarzan and she can be Jane, I didn't get the same response :(

No kids.
My networking is all online.
All my old friends are in other time zones.
I am not successful.

:helpme

You should have said u were Tom Cruise

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

get a dog, take him to the park and meet girls.
go to the gym, sports bar, whatever and meet guys.

i got a fortune cookie today that said something like

"you have to be a good friend before you can make friends"

that got me thinking....


... and i thought some more

"you ever stop to think and forget to start again ? "

shoulda went with the spiderman catwoman thing instead :thumbsup

Any of you ever lived in a college town?

Everyone in and out, new people every year. Everyone else in the same boat for the most part. Away from home, left all their friends behind. Meeting people isnt hard. And since all the younger kids are in the dorms or fraternities... everyone else is between 21 and 30 and from every background you can imagine.

Yea I have to agree with most of you... Your closest friends are the ones you spent your teen years with.... Most others are just people you know from business or whatever. When you get older, get jobs, families, etc. its harder to 'hang out' as much as you used to as when you were a carefree teenager.

I still keep in touch with most of my partners from high school, but we dont hang out much. The people I associate with are people I play B-ball with at the park, people who work with me, my neighbors (both home & office), and my Sensei. Of course I hang out with my lady and my son alot... :)



The Dawg

I moved up from small uni town to big city. At least I know most of the people I am meeting now will still be around in a couple of years.

Damnit. I have moved more than three hundred miles, every two years, since I was 19. Keep leaving the old ones behind, and having to start over.

Anyone else notice a common theme?

I think it is best summed up with a simple equation.

Wife + Kids = Death

true enough. I move around too much to make those life long bonding type friends. I cant stay in one place long before I start to get that itch to move.

Oh yeah. Me too. Shit.

I am 19 and I have no friends, at all.

A little life story here:

Me and my parents moved from Russia to Holland when I was about 6, and I basically grew up in poor neighbourhoods there, in afghanistan (dad was in the red army), and here in the Netherlands. We moved a lot, so last time I had really close friends was probably at age 12 or so.

One of them once stole my house key and robbed our house (stole a few computer games, wrecked our phone/fax machine, nothing serious), trust me I knew who it was right away. My dad went over his place (cuz mom didn't know, she was away for months) and their folks compensated for all the damage. Then a year or so later me and my mother started to notice someone been in our house regularly. Candy started to disappear, things were misplaced, etcetera. So I once stayed at home and didn't open the door when he rang the bell. Guess what, I caught him in action. Blackmailed him for about $15 and told him he owes me. I never told my mother, and dad didn't even know. I'm no rat and I know for sure he would have done the same thing.

And this was a guy I used to hang out with every day, played games with him, slept over, etc.

So now I'm damaged goods and I don't mind having no friends.

Well I have one from elementary school, but we both are totally different people. Plus he's homosexual. He calls me a few times a year or so, sometimes we go get a drink.

But whenever someone calls me I feel like they want something from me. I don't want anything from anyone, I never call the people I know, I never try to meet new people.

I probably don't have a healthy psyche because I don't mind. I smoke a lot of pot too, maybe it helps.

Just saying, you're not alone and it could be worse. At least you are still able to make friends.

I think that it is...most of the close friends that i currently have, i have known since grade school/high school, a few in college...

when you are younger, you have the opportunity to socialize in the same setting, every day, with a large group of people. When you get older, that setting changes to work?without recess. With webmasters, work could be at home on the computer all day

I agree with labret though?I had lost a lot of friends to wives

labret, keyDet79 needs a hug

you can't make friends as an adult like you did when you were a kid. when you're in school or just working some job like retail or waiting tables as a young person, you have lots of time to just hang out with people. Just hanging out for hours and hours is how you become real friends with somebody. Meeting somebody once every few weeks to go out to eat or drink or go to a game just isn't enough to really become friends.

If you work with people those people can wind up being friends/family cuz you're spending hours and hours with them.

I used to wonder why my Dad didn't have buddies when the gang of mutants I hung around with were my whole world. Between his career and family stuff he had no time. If he had played golf, he could have gotten away one day a week to hang out with other men but he didn't do that. His friends were guys in the same profession as his and they would meet in a restaurant every day for a couple of hours. Most of the men I never met in my life.

You are lucky in this world to have two or three true friends. Any more than that and you either have an amazing amount of free time or have a liberal definition of the word 'friend'.

Illnesses usually are the proof who your friends are. One of my friends developed schizophrenia in his first year of college, this guy was extremely popular with guys and girls. Only took about 6 months before he was down to 2 or 3 who hung in and tried to be there. People have their own lives and agendas.