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-   -   Just got out of jail..... (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=864463)

BVF 10-24-2008 10:16 PM

Just got out of jail.....
 
My ex wife showed up at my house drunk, fell out on the concrete OUTSIDE of my house...I didn't even know she was there until the fire engine showed up....I looked outside and they were tending to her on the corner...

Then the ambulance comes and she gets into it......then the COPS come......What happened is that she told them that I hit her and since she had a bruise on her lip from probably falling, they came and dragged me out of the house and arrested me.....They then took her to the hospital...My kids had to be picked up from my house by one of my ex-wife's friends...

My oldest daughter told the cops that I didn't hit her and I told him the same thing....The cop was pissed at first because I wouldn't open up the door for him but after they searched my house and talked to my daughter, the same cop came down and told me that he didn't think that I did it......Then the white cop told me that no matter what, it was a MANDATORY arrest because I have children with her and a history with her...

Then the told them that she lived at my house when she doesn't and they actually tried to tell me that I couldn't even go back to my own house because she temporarily occupied the premises....I told the Sherriff fuck that shit, I'm going back to my house...

I got arrested Wednesday night and I'm just now getting out....I didn't even have to see a judge...they set me free and I gotta go see the DA next month at which time, it will probably get dropped.....I had the orange jumpsuit on and my own cell and I ate jail food and played chess and we watched Nightmare on Elm Street 2 last night on tv....

So now I have to get a restraining order because I now know that if a woman wants to have you arrested, she can just go to your house and faint in the front yard....Fuck.....

Thank God I hid the ganja because I saw one dude locked up for a blunt ROACH....Another dude was locked up because he had a blunt cutter on his keychain and they locked him up for paraphanalia........I even met a pimp who calls himself Bob Barker and his saying is, "If the price is right, come on down BITCH!!"

Then I made some calls and relayed messages for some of the dudes that are still there....

I tell ya...The MAN is a muthafucka!!!

stickyfingerz 10-24-2008 10:17 PM

Snig Snpot. Ill read in a sec.. hehe

Spunky 10-24-2008 10:17 PM

Damn,quite a eventful night

JaneB 10-24-2008 10:19 PM

Wow. That sucks.

~Ray 10-24-2008 10:21 PM

did they serve chicken fried steak fingers and instant mashed potatoes?

marketsmart 10-24-2008 10:24 PM

that sucks.. at least you made some friends...

BVF 10-24-2008 10:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AdvertisingSex (Post 14948913)
did they serve chicken fried steak fingers and instant mashed potatoes?

No..you normally get a cold plate and a hot plate....For dinner, we had two hot dogs with two thick pieces of bread that you had to slice open with the back of your spork, tasteless Navy Beans and tasteless potatoes....On the cold plate was the bread, and a nasty piece of cake and something else that I can't remember because I didn't eat it.

For lunch, we had two sugar cookies, a banana and some kind of ham sandwiches.....I ate the ham, one cookie, and gave away my banana and the other cookie...

For breakfast, we had cold cereal, with some bread and some kind of mystery gravy that you were supposed to dip it into..I only ate the cereal...

Sands 10-24-2008 10:33 PM

I thought you were going to say that you mugged a woman at the ATM and then knocked her out because she was a McCain supporter, after which you carved a "B" on her face for "Blackvaginafinder."

In all seriousness, that's terrible and hopefully that restraining order will prevent anything like this from happening again. Good luck to you! :thumbsup

brassmonkey 10-24-2008 10:36 PM

damn thats bad yeah i had some crazy ones

Bojangles 10-24-2008 10:38 PM

Fuck, man. Get that restraining order.

KillerK 10-24-2008 10:41 PM

was the watermelon good?

PostWhore 10-24-2008 10:42 PM

that's what you get for living in a racist fucking country!

move to Canada!

BlackCrayon 10-24-2008 10:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BVF (Post 14948896)
Thank God I hid the ganja because I saw one dude locked up for a blunt ROACH....Another dude was locked up because he had a blunt cutter on his keychain and they locked him up for paraphanaliaI tell ya...The MAN is a muthafucka!!!

that reason alone is enough to never live in the US, lol. What are they afraid of? Oh well. Sorry to hear about the BS you gotta deal with. Fuckin psycho hose beasts.

PostWhore 10-24-2008 10:50 PM

that's what you get for living in a racist fucking country!

move to Canada!

stevo 10-24-2008 11:02 PM

Chess and movies? Sounds kinda fun! :winkwink:
Did time go fast, or did it feel like forever?

Imortyl Pussycat 10-24-2008 11:08 PM

fucking sucks man. sounds like you made the best of the worst situation :thumbsup restraining order immediately!

Puremeds-J 10-25-2008 12:08 AM

Damn that sucks! I remember when I was in I was always trading whatever sweet item they gave you with your breakfast.. makes ya king for a day on the inside

woj 10-25-2008 12:16 AM

that's fucked up, but you got off easy, often shit like that turns into way more drama than just a night in jail....

hypedough 10-25-2008 12:24 AM

Now that's some shit!

LeRoy 10-25-2008 12:37 AM

Be glad you're black cuz LA jail sux if your'e not

TheDoc 10-25-2008 12:49 AM

First, I told my kids this so I will share it. You DO NOT open the door for the Police. Police are not your friends, they are not here to protect you, they are not here to keep you safe. They are here to screw you over, fuck your family over, and do whatever some high-school educated jack ass "feels" is right.

Second, NEVER talk to the police, ever.. no matter wtf they say, never, ever, talk to them. You have the legal right, to force them to get you a lawyer.

Third, you never let a cop into your house, unless they have a warrant of course. If you have to answer the door, you tell them to back off your door by 10 feet. If they don't comply, you shut the door.



In this situation, I would have told my kids to go bed, shut the lights off. And ignored her ass.

d-null 10-25-2008 12:50 AM

...like I needed any reminders of why it is wise to stay as far as possible from anything even slightly resembling a relationship :2 cents:

budz 10-25-2008 12:59 AM

lol @ sands reply..

i just got locked up a few months ago

i was so drunk i was on suicide watch in the jail..

fuckin no clothes sucked.. on a gay as matt with a itchy ass cover.. whew

needless to say first thing i did when i got in the cell is piss.. and not in just 1 spot ehehe

then just a few weeks ago iw as with my boy who was pulled over for no headlights, charged with dui then got locked up and charged with battery on a cop for farting on him

i had to goto a fuckin drunk tank blowin .265 had to wake up n eat pickle loaf omfg that shits nasty rofl

glad we;re all free :}

Rorschach 10-25-2008 01:00 AM

that's a great narrative, you should write edgy modern fiction

mrwilson 10-25-2008 01:04 AM

that sucks man, enjoy your freedom

Lykos 10-25-2008 01:07 AM

Damn,ex's can be dangerours

Naughty 10-25-2008 01:13 AM

The story of you and the mother of your child is almost as bad and unduring as mine. Luckily for me, you win on the drama scale, but it's close i tell ya.

Mine loves the wrong things too and has a personality disorder to top it off. Sad to see a nice woman to turn shit when it is the mother of your child :(

Big Red Machine 10-25-2008 01:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrwilson (Post 14949312)
that sucks man, enjoy your freedom

I don't know who you are but thats a nice ass in your avatar

CunningStunt 10-25-2008 01:28 AM

Is your ass sore?

Seriously though BVF, that's totally fucked up. Sorry to hear about your woes.

Can you sue them for wrongful arrest? That's what I'd do. Get a good lawyer and hit them hard. Say you haven't slept since and are traumatised etc. Should be good for $50K if you kick and scream enough!

Deej 10-25-2008 01:32 AM

That bitch is nothing but trouble to you man ... better handle that hoe :pimp

kmanrox 10-25-2008 01:39 AM

sry to hear that bro... The Man is shit and always will be.

move somewhere you have more freedom

After Shock Media 10-25-2008 02:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CunningStunt (Post 14949347)
Can you sue them for wrongful arrest? That's what I'd do. Get a good lawyer and hit them hard. Say you haven't slept since and are traumatised etc. Should be good for $50K if you kick and scream enough!

That is damn near funny. Personally hate what happened to him but come on, sue the police for wrongful arrest on a domestic charge? They just did the standard follow procedure routine in almost every damn state. He could sue the ex wife but trying to sue the police would just be a waste of lawyer fee's and he would loose.

papill0n 10-25-2008 02:14 AM

fuck sounds like a real nightmare

martinsc 10-25-2008 02:17 AM

damn... sounds like part of an episode of "the shield"...

MrMaxwell 10-25-2008 02:32 AM

Shit
You got hotdogs and sandwiches and shit?
When I went into a jail I played cards all night the first night because I was lucky enough to come in on poker tournament night. We got hot dogs once a week for lunch. It was a big deal. Usually by that time I had won enough poker games and/or done enough trading to have three or four. I usually had several breakfasts instead of one of the "PB&J" sandwiches for breakfast I'd have three or four and extra bowls of cereal. But where I was if you don't know how to play poker, how to make good trades, forget it.

The first week I got so robbed on trades. Hell it was disasterous. Shit. All in all after about a week I got the best "bunk" close to the tv so I could go up there and read my paper and watch the TV all day and then come down for meals and poker games. It was a POD so there were 20-35 of us in there all in one room all of the time.

It is the worst thing ever that can happen - being caged up like an animal. I had my paper, card games, tv to watch, a phone and hot water that never ran out. When everyone was asleep I'd take a two or three hour hot shower. Would never want to go back but I made the best of it.

You got TWO HOT DOGS and a SANDWICH and CEREAL your first day in? What it was, a country club?

MrMaxwell 10-25-2008 02:36 AM

LoL over here I forgot all about the coffee!
If my trades weren't running good I used coffee as money.

It was just county jail so you can only use $18.50 / wk from your books, well I would find broke cases I knew were in waiting for their case, coffee was $4.50 a bag and you got 27 "teaspoon shots" out of it which were worth about $.25 each in there. $.25 was worth something in there, for example, breakfast sandwich = $.50 lunch hotdog = $1.00

Everyone was always starved for coffee especially the meth guys so I would get 4 bags on my books and 4 bags on a couple other guys books .. so when I didn't win enough or I lost I could just buy my way out.

james_clickmemedia 10-25-2008 03:51 AM

x wife drama, been there....

Axzar 10-25-2008 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheDoc (Post 14949291)
First, I told my kids this so I will share it. You DO NOT open the door for the Police. Police are not your friends, they are not here to protect you, they are not here to keep you safe. They are here to screw you over, fuck your family over, and do whatever some high-school educated jack ass "feels" is right.

Second, NEVER talk to the police, ever.. no matter wtf they say, never, ever, talk to them. You have the legal right, to force them to get you a lawyer.

Third, you never let a cop into your house, unless they have a warrant of course. If you have to answer the door, you tell them to back off your door by 10 feet. If they don't comply, you shut the door.

This thread delivers!

seeandsee 10-25-2008 04:06 AM

that sucks

dav3 10-25-2008 06:25 AM

thats fucked up.

time to teach that crazy woman who the man is.


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