Is it alright to hit your kids?
 

OK, I got in this debate with my sister cause she's gonna have her baby any day now. I asked her, are you going to spank your kids? She said no, do you remember how many times we would get hit as a kid. I said, yes, but look how we turned out! We were never abused or anything like that, but we got some hurt if we did something stupid. Anyone else agree with me? Personally, I think this is why kids get out of line these days! Any thoughts?

i want to hit some people..lol

I agree. All most kids need is a good ass whuppin' to put them back in line. Instead of seeing a quick resolution from a little spanking, these days the parents will choose to zombify their kids with drugs that their kids don't need rather than hand down a little discipline.

Hit? no.

Spanking? Hell yes. Not enough discipline these days. "Time outs" are meaningless to a lot of kids.

So are you saying you turned out ok? Rick James says "hold my jousting pole bitch" LOL.

I don't hit either of my kids. They are well-behaved. The youngest is only 20 months though but she is really a little angel so far. We'll see in a few months.

I spank my kids butt or hand, with my hand. I don't believe in the wooden spoon, belts or anything like that.

I don't want them to be afraid of a belt, I want them to be afraid of disappointing me enough to have to punish them.

I was spanked only on my butt and hand and I learned right from wrong throughout my childhood.

I also put my kids in the corner any place they act up ... airports, Baskin Robbins, you name it. If a parent lets their kid act up in public, the kid will think they can do it anywhere and it only makes homelife harder.

So your parents spanked you and you ended up a pornographer peddling porn on a board called "Go Fuck Yourself!" :1orglaugh

I would never hit my kids and never have hit my only son. There are other ways to keep them in line.

I don't think violence breeds good behavior, it breeds resentment.

If you have badly behaved children, look in the mirror.

I love it when I see parents trying to reason with their 4 year old kid having a tantrun in the middle of a department store...back in the day if I pulled that my dad would yank me to a corner and spank me and that would be the end of it.

I think parents are too afraid to try any physical punishment on their kids...they dont want to be reported by some neighbour for "child abuse" and have to be investigated and such

Right there with you!

Though its probably been 5 years since either one of my kids have gotten spanked, and they are almost too old(9and11), but every time we are out with other people, they always comment on how polite and well behaved my kids are, and that doesn't mean shy and quiet, but respectful and not running around like little asshats... :pimp

I think I turned out OK. There are some stuff that would fall into the "gray area" category... but all I have to say is "There are so many amendments... I plead the FIF"

It is a real concern. It is definitely less socially acceptable here now.

Back to the main question ... Every kid is different. I don't think the same rewards and punishments can be used on every kid with the same effectiveness.

Personally I think that if you're smart enough you'll find a way to explain to ur child ur point of view without any phisical power....
We all need 2 comunicate more and this world will be a better place 2 live in =)

I agree with you.

Sorry ... that idealistic view is a load of shit.

Kids do bad things ... on purpose. They generally don't listen to 'talks' from adults. Because it's more fun to do bad shit.

Fact is ... MOST kids that were smacked, grow up as well rounded, normal individuals, and do not have a problem with that fact.

It's only when the smacking turns into beating when it's a problem.

Idealistic and unrealistic views on children are the kinds of things that allow kids to get unruly... have you taken a look outside on the street and seen what kids are like nowadays? They think they own the fucking world. And I'm afraid that they pretty much do in some places.

you have no experience with kids at all do you...I get the feeling you arn't much older than a kid yourself

I completely agree with you. I was never spanked or hit growing up and I can't thank my parents enough.
I believe there are so many other, more effective ways to communicate and get your children to behave other then merely hitting them. To me, it's taking the easy way out to execute that kind of punishment.
Kids aren't born little brats, they learn to be. If you correct the bad attitude early- the right way- there's less of a chance they'll continue that behavior. :2 cents:

I prefer to hit OTHER people's kids.

Only at the blue light in K-Mart

"Spanking of children within families is illegal in some countries (for example, Sweden, Switzerland, Iceland, Finland, Denmark, Norway, Austria, the Netherlands, Germany, Italy, Malta, Cyprus, Croatia, Israel, Latvia,Estonia, and as of January 2007, Greece). " - Wikipedia

As long as they are 18 and willing ;-)

Best post on this subject I've read in a while.

:thumbsup

Yep I would agree! And out of all of these kids that are running rampid, how many do you think were spanked? I would say a lot, if not all of them.

....Not to say that they are little assholes because they were spanked, but maybe it has a little something to do with it. Possible resentment like LiveDose had said earlier?

I agree, nowhere near enough discipline these days. I can remember NOT doing certain stupid things growing up because I knew what my dad would do if he found out.

yes and no. I don't thinking hitting with a fist or hitting in the face is ok. But I don't think there is anything long with using a little force. Every mammal on the planet uses force in some way or another with their kids.

There is no valid reason to spank a kid (or anyone else for that matter unless they like it), parents just need to start raising their kids again, period.

Well said, twisted. :thumbsup

I don't know, looking back on my childhood, I'd much rather take PHYSICAL punishment than Mental... My dad was in the Military and could mess with your mind! I would have preferred being smacked a few times and having it done with. Sometimes the mental punishment could last the whole day and night!

only in anger

Most of my friends who spank their kids have kids who repeatedly misbehave & run around like wild monkeys.

As far as I am concerned, spanking is a reaction of your own emotion, and that emotion is anger. You are angry at your childs behavior .. you are mad so you want to hit something.
This doesn't teach any great lesson, but hey, to each his own.

Positive reinforcement for good behavior seems to work for me. When my son is misbehaving I will say, "you know, it's crazy, you are so good but right now you aren't acting like it... weird?"
Logic tends to turn him around & that's the truth.
For the most part, if you tell kids they are good, they will be.

My parents never spanked me, and I never spank my son.
Seems like we tend to follow our parents examples based on the responses in this thread.

I was pretty lucky. Both of my kids were really good kids. I don't recall ever having to spank either of them, usually a stern look was enough to make them cry if they fucked up.

I seem to recall my ex spanking my daughter once, but that is rather hazy.

I used to get the crap kicked out of me by my both of my parents . . . especially my dad. These days he would go to jail for what he did.

That being said, I think most parents are fearful of applying discipline on kids these days. I went to jail for grabbing my g'f's daughter by the wrist. I had to go to trial and the whole bit. Was found innocent but was enough that I would never let anyone else with a kid move in here.

hit ur kids or hit it with ur kids?? heh...i think both are bad

I made a vow when I was a kid that I would never be like my parents.

As others have said: Spanking, yes. Hitting, no. There's a difference.

Spanking, to me, is a brief swat on the butt to get their attention that you're displeased, not a means of discipline.

These days I hardly ever spank my kids. I thought for a while it would work, but it really doesn't. Sending them to their room, making them stand in the corner, making them sit in a chair, all work about as well as spanking. In fact, sending them to their room seems to work surprisingly well.

Sometimes they just get in a mood where nothing you do works. At that point, sending them to their room is best if for no other reason than it keeps you from really wailing on them.

very well said :thumbsup

of course, a part of discipline..
sometimes verbal discipline is not enough unless you hit them up..

My dad and his brothers got the everloving shit beaten out of them as kids. My dad's like the last boy scout. He doesn't cuss, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs or anything. His brothers were more hit and miss though but most of them turned out OK

:1orglaugh man... :1orglaugh

situational, but in some cases yes i agree they need a good spanking, and yes i agree parents are way too passive these days