A guy breaks into a house...
 

A guy breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." To which his wife responds, "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

hahaha ouch

hehe... great!

hahahahah

:1orglaugh

great stuff :thumbsup


:1orglaugh :1orglaugh lol :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

one word..

OWNED

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Awessssommmeeeeeeee lollll

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

a humourous piece of literature indeed, but too predictable to be laugh out loud funny, ya dig? see sig!

poor bastard...

Looks like he's going to learn the meaning of tough love :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

HAHA! Good one!!

lmao... funny shit.., thanks dude

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

That was great :)

he got it in the end

ty for that

eowwww.... hahhahhaha, thats kinda weird!

Heard it before but still fucking hilarious :thumbsup
:1orglaugh

:thumbsup :thumbsup :thumbsup
:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

What a twist! :1orglaugh

Lol that's a good one

lol cool

thank God the wife told the guy where to find vaseline. that is love:1orglaugh

haha i love that joke :)

nice:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Sucks to be him... :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh

thank you *bow*

We all need to see this again tonight.

:warning :warning :Oh crap :Oh crap :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :warning :warning

that sucks

not the joke but that sucks for that guy

haha :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Never gets old :p

haha!!!! :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh
i wish him luck!
great one :thumbsup

sucks to be him, but at least the robber asked where the vasoline was

That's awesome!