Mel Gibson's new 'Jesus Movie' totally authentic except: Wasn't Jesus A Black Dude?
 

If I recall during art history classes in college, the earliest paintings of Jesus and his mom were of black people who often had reddish hair like you see in southern Egypt and Ethiopia. These paintings and drawings continued this likeness for centuries and the more Christianity grew in Europe the lighter he got.

So Mel Gibson makes this new 'Jesus Movie' boasting it's so authentic that the people actually speak Aramaic the language at the time. Yet the actor playing Jesus is a white dude with blue eyes (again).

I guess if Gibson makes a movie about Mao Tse Tung he'll pick a guy with blonde hair?

Wouldn't bother me normally but there's so much bs about this movie and about how historically accurate it's supposed to be, how several actors got hit by lightning, how Gibson is emotionally wrought about it all yadda yadda yadda.

Next time they make a Jesus movie I say they get Danny DeVito to play Jesus. That'll make people stand up and take notice.

Jesus wasn't black?

I don't know about black with red hair, but the documentaries they've had trying to reconstruct the appearance of "Jesus" (not his real name - the Greek's fucked up the translation) they came up with a short, around 5 foot, middle eastern male. Dark skinned, dark hair. The "Jesus" they show in church's is about as real as Santa Claus.

Black with red hair??

I've SOLVEd IT!

Dennis rodman iS JESUS!


....but yea he was darker skinned and the hippie we know today as jesus is lame.

I'm pretty sure everyone back in that time was made of bronze. I keep hearing that, so I'm cool with it.

Yes..The Messiah was of the Negro Race

I'm still upset that they're making catwoman a black woman in the new movie.

Being that black people are not half as worthy as white people, why would the Son of God be black?

Jesus, think before you speak! :winkwink:

Found it. Jesus was a Greek attempt to translate his Hebrew name which was http://hometowncash.com/SonName.gif pronounced Yahushua. When the Gentiles tried to transliterate His name into Greek, they came up with ihsoun or "Iesous". When Iesous was transliterated into Latin, it became "Iesus", which was then carried over into English it became our modern day "Jesus" when the letter "J" developed.

source

if ya care :)

Jesus probably looked like this....

http://www.valzubiri.com/games/cursebot/binladen.jpg

I smell some drama comin'

His parents were not from africa. They were from the middle east. There is quite a difference.

His parents?

nope, that would be the modern day hitler

Ok if you buy into the virgin mary crap... HIS PARENT.

Where did this "Jesus was black" shit come from anyway? I mean, the same people who live in the area now (jews, arabs), are the same who lived there thousands of years ago. They ain't white but they sure as hell ain't black either. Let's call them olive skins.

Thank you.

lets just say that he was blue and stop the upcoming drama!!

Who gives a shit what it looks like. It doesn't fucking matter. White people are just dicks for fabricating the image in their own likeness.

and black guys saying hes black dont do that?? thats funny man

The current state of organized christianity is a web of deceit woven by a group of rouge hippies during the early '70s

Jesus should watch out for Gargamel!

I didn't say shit about black people. I never excluded them from being dicks, I just didn't address that aspect. The thread was started with the question of why was Jesus portrayed as a white guy. Don't try to read between the lines, Tex.

good point, lets just say that I maked it clear that black people are allso dicks for saying hes black

cool

And the olive skinned are they dicks too, and don't forget those yellow bastards arn't they major pencil dicks?

Jesus was a Hebrew.. They are much lighter skinned, more like a greek or arabic complexion I believe.

Jesus was Jewish



Rip

http://popularmechanics.com/science/...suslead-lg.jpg

According to this site this is what he looks like

The olive skins are small major dicks! But now we have solved the dicks problem

Does Monica Bellucci get naked in this one as well? Mary Magdalene was a whore so it should bring some authenticity.

...ok...

I would hit it.

I knew it! He-man is gay!

News Flash: Archaeologists unveil a computer model forensically constructed of the Virgin Mary and Jesus.

http://www.gregboone.com/smurfgfy.jpg

James Caviezel plays Jesus, the Christ. That is a nice step from playing 'Rear F-18 pilot' in 'The Rock'.

Jesus has a hot bitch

Didn't I make that joke?