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-   -   You believe in Jesus? (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=92746)

marty 12-09-2002 12:25 AM

You believe in Jesus?
 
Just a question.

SleazyDream 12-09-2002 12:27 AM

there are 1000's of Jesus's - mostly mexican.

TDF 12-09-2002 12:27 AM

I believe in the almighty dollar..Miracles happen,the cripple begin to walk,the blind can see,and I can move all obstacles in my way.

Ace-Ace 12-09-2002 12:28 AM

Jesus (the biblical character) existed as a person, but was nothing miraculous.

TDF 12-09-2002 12:29 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ace-Ace
Jesus (the biblical character) existed as a person, but was nothing miraculous.
I can turn water into whine...let me touch your significant other..and I will heal her from all iniquities

Donny 12-09-2002 12:44 AM

PLEASE KNOW:



I truly believe in God. In my opinion, anyone should be able to walk out the door and see evidence of his existence. Actually, walking out the door isn?t even necessary. God is incredible and incredibly evident. I don't believe he inspired the Bible. Here are reasons why (this is good stuff to use in arguments with Christians. I was raised a Pastor's son.... so I know a thing or two about scriptures):


TOUGH SCRIPTURES (I ASKED THE LOCAL PASTOR):



Scriptures like Hosea 13:16, Samuel 15:2-3, and many others make it difficult to accept that God inspired the Bible. Are you sure it wasn't angry Jewish men attempting to get everyone to think the same way they do, and writing messages of revenge against those that didn't see things the same way they do? (Especially in the Old Testament). Here are a few example scriptures that make me scratch my head:


Hosea 13:16 (Toddlers Killed and Babies Ripped From Pregnant Women):

Revised Standard Version

16 Sama'ria shall bear her guilt, because she has rebelled against her God; they shall fall by the sword, their little ones shall be dashed in pieces, and their pregnant women ripped open.



King James Version

16 Samaria shall become desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up.



1 Samuel 15:2-3 (Killing Women and Children for God):

Revised Standard Version

3 Now go and smite Am'alek, and utterly destroy all that they have; do not spare them, but kill both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass.'"



King James Version

3 Now go and smite Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not; but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass.



Later in that same chapter, Samuel hacks a man to pieces for the Lord. Huh? Is this the same loving God I hear about throughout the Bible? So many verses like those above appear throughout the Bible. It?s hard to accept a perfect, loving, unchanging God inspired such things. Just one inconsistency or inaccuracy means a perfect being didn?t inspire the book. That would be imperfect. So, God had a greater plan with these killings? I don?t accept that. That explanation is what human believers need to come up with in order to cope? it?s either ?explain it away? or ?toss it out?. Tossing out the Bible would be blasphemy, now wouldn?t it? What, then, would we base our lives upon? Shall we accept something because there isn?t a better alternative?



HISTORICAL ACCURACY:



The argument that the Bible is historically accurate doesn?t prove God inspired it. Stephen King?s latest book mentions the bombing of the twin towers. He also talks about several other true current events. 1,000 years from now, when someone reads it, shall they decide that the book is fact because it contains historical accuracies? The historical accuracies in the Bible mean one thing: the people who wrote each book were actually in the land they claimed to be in during the time they claim to be there. Historical accuracy does not equate to truth, as the Stephen King example illustrates.



SUMMARIES OF ADDITIONAL QUESTIONS (SOME RESTATED):



1. Why would a God who created all of us choose one group of us to be his ?chosen? people?

The Bible says the Jews are God?s chosen? does it strike you as merely coincidental that the authors of the books that make this claim happen to be (drum roll please)? JEWISH? Hmmm?



2. Why would God punish us for eternity (our lifespan multiplied by billions and gazillions) for messing up here on earth during our miniscule 70 year existence?

I?d never spank my son for the rest of his life for disobedience, even if I fully explained to him why he shouldn?t disobey (?hey, he knew the consequences, HE made the choice? I don?t like it but I can?t look upon his sin ? even though I created him - so I HAVE to spank him daily for the rest of his life? ) hmmm?

Or how about this scenario: I have 10 kids. I choose one of them to be more important than all of the others. I choose child #1 to be that important child. I make this decision after I send children 6-10 off to Siberia where they have no communication with me. If all my children don?t believe the rules I have instructed child #1 to write I?ll send them into eternal torment or shoot them in the head. I don?t care that the children in Siberia weren?t here when I made these rules? these rules should be evident to them. Maybe they have ESP or something. (How shall the billions that have died without knowledge of Christ ever get to heaven? Jesus specifically says ?NO MAN comes to the father but by me??, there are no other options). We are humans and our minds can?t truly comprehend the vastness of God?s ways. How can we be expected to know?.?



3. Why does God (that never changes) tell us not to kill in Exodus, and then rip innocent unborns from their mother?s wombs in Hosea?

Please don?t tell me this is subject to interpretation and that ?Thou Shalt Not Kill? actually means something other than what it says. That?s BS.



4. Why is the Bible so hard to understand?

If you wanted to create a guidebook for your young children, wouldn?t you put it into language they ALL could easily understand? Why would only a select few of them actually comprehend it (or claim to)? Isn?t God a much more perfect parent than any of us? Wouldn?t that mean he?d be even MORE inclined to make things simple. I BELIEVE HE HAS? look at the evidence of himself he?s put into his creation. It?s there WITHOUT the need for a hate-filled book (yes, it?s contains love also, but hate prevails ? you better walk on the ?straight and narrow? if you don?t want to be eternally doomed ? or could eternal damnation have been invented by the human authors that put pen to paper in an attempt to convince us that WE better believe what THEY wrote? OR ELSE).



I believe I could LITERALLY write a book on why I don?t think God inpired the Bible. The more I read it, the LESS I believe a perfect God inspired it. Did God make it NECESSARY to have a book in place that we must follow in order to reunite with Him? I do not think so?



-Donny

Hooper 12-09-2002 12:49 AM

oh jesus.. we have a jesus freak on our hands.

fact is that nobody with any brains denies that jesus existed. the question is did "christ" exist.

Donny 12-09-2002 12:56 AM

Hooper... read what I wrote before you label me a Jesus freak. It's obvious you didn't do so. I was using the Bible to prove the Bible can't be inspired by God. Example: does it make sense a loving God that says "thou shalt not kill" in one verse to command the Jews to rip babies out of their mother's wombs in another? I referenced both scriptures above. It's great material to use when talking to "Christians".

TDF 12-09-2002 12:57 AM

jesus was black..

Hooterdog 12-09-2002 12:59 AM

http://www.xxxwebcam.net/images/jesusmsg.jpg

Donny 12-09-2002 01:00 AM

http://dirty4free.com/underwear/underwear2_zoom.jpg

Hooterdog 12-09-2002 01:01 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by toodamnfli
jesus was black..
I think he looks more like Nick Carter from Back Street Boys

.:Frog:. 12-09-2002 01:02 AM

Jesus was real of course.

TDF 12-09-2002 01:04 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hooterdog


I think he looks more like Nick Carter from Back Street Boys

1. He called everybody brother.
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.

imJason 12-09-2002 01:07 AM

jesus is domain scwatting on me,

vidsvidsvids.com is my site

and yet

http://vidsvidsvidsvids.com
http://vidsvidsvids.org

these domains belong to jesus

jesus has stole my domains names and it trying to get my search engine traffic


fuck you jesus

Hooterdog 12-09-2002 01:07 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by toodamnfli


1. He called everybody brother.
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.

what about the crappy wardrobe

.:Frog:. 12-09-2002 01:14 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hooterdog

what about the crappy wardrobe

That would be #4 on the list.

TDF 12-09-2002 01:15 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hooterdog


what about the crappy wardrobe


jesus started the sandal craze...chicks love a man with nice feet

kevinl 12-09-2002 03:45 AM

I believe he was the son of God.

goBigtime 12-09-2002 04:28 AM

The virgin mary was abducted.

Paul Markham 12-09-2002 04:42 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ace-Ace
Jesus (the biblical character) existed as a person, but was nothing miraculous.
He existed but the man we really follow is Peter.

He was the guy with the balls to go to Rome and preach at a time when Hebrews were killing Roman soldiers. Maybe that is where a lot of anti Semitism stemmed from cos he had to distance himself from those guys.

The old testament was written while the Jews were in exile in Babylon to keep their faith alive and their hopes up. The stories were written from folk law.

I believe in Jesus, it?s all the fuckers that followed him afterwards that get me riled.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/2556959.stm

ez12 12-09-2002 04:46 AM

I'm an athiest there is nothing but the death that comes after this

Scootermuze 12-09-2002 04:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by goBigtime
The virgin mary was abducted.
yet another change of definitions contained in the book..
The original manuscripts refferred to Mary as Ahma <sp> .. which meant 'young woman' not 'virgin'.. The virgin part was an assumption on the part of those who changed the writings through the years..

Kinda throws the, "being born of a virgin" story right out the window...

eroswebmaster 12-09-2002 05:18 AM

Quote:

Do you believe in Jesus?
Sure...he trims my lawn and his wife cleans my house.

I think they got a couple of kids...Jose and Lupita.

Braincash Fred 12-09-2002 06:42 AM

Yes but only the one on www.jesus.com :Graucho

goBigtime 12-09-2002 06:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Scootermuze


yet another change of definitions contained in the book..
The original manuscripts refferred to Mary as Ahma <sp> .. which meant 'young woman' not 'virgin'.. The virgin part was an assumption on the part of those who changed the writings through the years..

Kinda throws the, "being born of a virgin" story right out the window...

Well techinically the virgin mary was married at the time anyway no?.. I doubt she was a virgin. I think it was more the immaculate conception that they were trying to get across with the whole "virgin mary" thing. Bottom line is god swooped up the young woman and sent her back down bearing a less obvious 'son of god' than the ones that were here previously (cause that didn't go over very well :warning - read genesis chapter 6)

thatdykeliz 12-09-2002 08:41 AM

Believe in Jesus? No thank you, I'm a godless pagan.

Wiccan, actually. Priestess, if you want to get all specific and shit. And I believe that the Lady smiles on my porn biz because The Charge of the Goddess says that "All acts of love and pleasure are My rituals." :thumbsup

WiredGuy 12-09-2002 08:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by toodamnfli


1. He called everybody brother.
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.

Good one :Graucho

WG

thatdykeliz 12-09-2002 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by toodamnfli


1. He called everybody brother.
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.

TDF, have you seen Dogma? I love that movie. :thumbsup

"You knew Jesus?"

"Know him? Shit, ****** owes me 12 bucks."

thatdykeliz 12-09-2002 08:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by toodamnfli
jesus was black..
...and Eve was a sistah.

Wenchy 12-09-2002 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by thatdykeliz
Believe in Jesus? No thank you, I'm a godless pagan.

Wiccan, actually. Priestess, if you want to get all specific and shit. And I believe that the Lady smiles on my porn biz because The Charge of the Goddess says that "All acts of love and pleasure are My rituals." :thumbsup

It's always nice to discover that I'm among Pagan friends :winkwink:

I believe some dude name Jesus probably existed, that he wore sandals and bad robes, and that he pissed off the Romans by running around preaching to whoever would listen (strangely, I'm reminded of Jehovah's Witnesses here). I also believe that organized religion was created by HUMANS as a means of instilling fear and control over large groups of uneducated impoverished people.

For what it's worth, there's my :2 cents:

Thrawn$ 12-09-2002 09:53 AM

Jesus (the biblical character) Never existed.

Religion it' a science that motherFucker use to controle the population and take their money :thumbsup

JFK 12-09-2002 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by toodamnfli
I believe in the almighty dollar..Miracles happen,the cripple begin to walk,the blind can see,and I can move all obstacles in my way.
Fuck TDF you took the words Right out of my mouth ! Yes I Beleeeeeeeeeeeve in the Almighty $:Graucho

PerfectionGirls 12-09-2002 11:05 AM

Quote:

I believe in Jesus, it?s all the fuckers that followed him afterwards that get me riled.
LOL!! Right On Dude!!


Christianity would be a kick ass religion if it went for all the Christians. I swear man!!

Fletch XXX 12-09-2002 11:08 AM

People have no clue.

Keep believing what 'they' told you.

The Story of Christ, is nothing more than the resurrection theory.

Christ was only one of MAAAANY Resurrection Gods. His story was stolen from other stories, no need to despute facts, the *other* stories date 6-9k BC.

The Earliest story was Isis and Osirus (Resurrection God) 9000 years before Christ.

Quit watching the fucking Sopranos and pick up a book.

:1orglaugh

Thrawn$ 12-09-2002 11:09 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fletch XXX
People have no clue.

Keep believing what 'they' told you.

The Story of Christ, is nothing mroe than the resurrection theory.

Christ was only one of MAAAANY Resurrection Gods.

The Earliest story was Isis and Osirus (Resurrection God)

Quit watching the fucking Sopranos and pick up a book.

:1orglaugh

Nice :1orglaugh

Fletch XXX 12-09-2002 11:15 AM

<a href=http://gofuckyourself.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=87093>Cloning Explains Jesus Resurrection</a>

<a href=http://gofuckyourself.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=78590>Why do people believe in god?</a>

<a href=http://gofuckyourself.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=79614>Just got back from Church</a>

Those are some of the best threads on GFY about 'god'

Thrawn$ 12-09-2002 11:19 AM

This is the man David Icke

DX 12-09-2002 11:21 AM

I guarantee that if any of you so-called athiests or non-believers in a God, suddenly had a gun shoved down your throat, at least one of your last mumbled words would be "God".

Fletch XXX 12-09-2002 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by DX
I guarantee that if any of you so-called athiests or non-believers in a God, suddenly had a gun shoved down your throat, at least one of your last mumbled words would be "God".
That pretty much Catholicism.

How do you think they maintain their numbers?

:1orglaugh


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