What do you do when you feel someone is trying to bully you?
 

I'm a pretty laid back person and often people mistake that for being weak and try to bully me or emotionally blackmail me. I'm getting a bit of that at the moment in a personal issue where I don't want to cause a fuss but I also don't want people to think they can walk all over me. I am laid back to a point and then I snap and I want to find a way to deal with it before I snap.

Get in front of them, look them right in the eye and explain your problem. At that point, it then becomes THEIR problem.

Assuming we're not talking about the kind of bully that's going to punch you in the eye of course...

Always stand up for yourself. If that means you take a beating, then take a beating. Beatings are good every no and then. We learn from them. Don't take "beating" in the literral sense. I am sure you understand me.

Destroy them.

heheeh..

You have to make an example every now and then so people know what you are capable of so they won't fuck with you.

Just say to them what you just typed.

wow...you sound exactly like me.

doesnt matter if its family, friends or anyone else..i dont let anyone take advantage of me & i'm quick to put them back in their place. dont take any shit from anyone. stand your ground, no one else is gonna do it for you.

Can I bully them for you ? Who do I contact ?

you can still keep your laid back character...just be sure to let people know that you'll flip on them REAL QUICK if they fuck with you. Nothing wrong with bullying them right back.

I think you have to put a stop to it, before it escalates. There are certain personality types who seek out people with their hot buttons exposed.

Whoever is mistaking your laid back personality for submissive, or vunerable needs to be set straight. I don't think you have to cause a fuss so to speak, but if you address it now, you'll have the upper hand. IMHO.

I'll bet when you show your hand, that person will back down and you can get on with your day.

Good luck.

HOLY SHIT YOU JUST SO DESCRIBED ME! I am going through the exact same thing right now. I was balling my eyes out yesterday because of it. And no matter what I say to try to stop it before I fucking punch them in the face, it just gets worse and worse. I have no idea what to do to make it better. If anyone has any ideas I would love to hear them too!

http://www.iballer.com/wallpaper/cel...24x768_jpg.jpg

You make a call to the Gotti boyz.

:thumbsup :1orglaugh

Well this is family - well ex-family really - so I am not going to actually hit anyone but on the other hand I don't want to fight with this person either for a variety of reasons including respect for memories (for lack of a way of putting it) but also because it feels like it would take up too much energy. However, I don't want to set things as a pattern for the rest of my life where I am just a doormat.

Try this... practice being mean to people who you don't like... only the ones who really deserve it though. It'll be hard at first but that'll bring out a hint of the killer instinct in you, plus... you'll have fun doing it. Then when you come across random asshats who deserve it, you're already primed and ready to rock.:thumbsup

hack there cell phone and post naked pics of them all over the net

Brilliant. Then my mind would be more focused on the pain from stabbing my own eyes out.

Walk up to them, piss on their foot and walk away.

I feel for you I really do. Family is a hard one to deal with. I had a problem with my two half sisters. No matter what I did they would keep pulling their same shit with me. So I finally dropped them out of my life. I have not spoke with them for over 7 years. The best revenge is to not care, or something like that. If they are going to be at my parents house I won't go. They are 12 and 13 years older than me, and right now they are hating that I am ignoring them. But you know, this is my life and I am not going to put myself around people who hurt me and bring me down and that is what bully's do. It's not worth it to me. So I cut them out. I am sure your situation is different than this one. But sometimes just hearing other people are dealing with it helps. :)

The one I am currently in is not a family member and is a person I HAVE to deal with everyday, which is so damn frustrating. In all honesty, I like the person and it really just hurts me terribly to be treated this way, but I see no answer to making it better. :(

I am extremely laid back and calm at all times. Talking way to calm apparently. (case in point, one night some black guy crawls into my kitchen after apparently being shot in the back. I call 911 and while talking to them getting all the info they need I am also treating the guy. Bunch of cops show up in swat gear and due to me being so damn calm they actually start questioning me cause they think I am being to calm). No people for awhile use to take my laid back and calm persona as a sign of weakness as well. Problem is I also have a very thin line between calm and pissed off. Sure there is a good deal of distance between the two, but once pissed off my personality switches over to calm, calculating and hell bent on destroying what pissed me off.
Once there has been a victem or two who crossed that line, others soon learn quickly not to push you that far. Just let people know when they get to you and kindly explain if this continues you will eventually snap and release a fury that can only be described in biblical terms.

P.S. One sure fire way to push me over that line quickly is doing shit to friends of mine. Specially good hearted people who do not deserve such shit.

Punch them in the face, and then when they're down, kick them in the ribs a few times for good measure. Then spit on them as you walk away with your chin high :pimp

That might turn them on! :1orglaugh

Next time you speak to them, laugh and say this:

This is so odd, but I had a dream about you last night. I drugged you and tied you up in a basement. I sewed your eyes and lips shut with thick thread, and cut you into small pieces in my bathtub. I kept your head in a freezer, but buried the rest of you where no one would ever find you. Isn't that strange ?

it sounds like you think you're in a situation that you realize you're going to have to deal with either now or later... so why let it fester within yourself until later?

what the fuck was it a full moon..

without knowing exactly what the issue is I would just not talk to them show them the hand.

if thats not possible tell them to pack there shit up and get out...

True.. if YOU did that to me.. it'd probably be a turn on too. :/ See my advice to Sarah above.

That is one of my problems too, I have no middle emotion, it's either nice or fucking kill. I take it and take it and keep it in and then once I have had it, I explode, which doesn't help at all. With this situation, if I say something back or say I don't like something then I can the pfttt, sigh, giggle under the breath, like you dumb bitch whatever. And then that pisses me off even fucking more. :mad:

Sorry Sara didn't mean high jack your thread with my own problem, but maybe some of the advice I get can help you and visa versa! :)

LOL that may even work :upsidedow

That is my plan, not to talk to them anymore. But it does hurt because I like to play and joke and have fun and if I don't talk to them anymore then I will have to stay out of any of the jokes. That hurts. But what choice do I have? If I joke around then I get rude comments and put downs.

I am a very happy person and like to always find something to laugh at even when times are bad. I am also a very forgiving person who is willing to work anything out and give to another person to help make life better. It's just sad. :(

Well I won't dwell on it anymore. The only thing I can do it take one day at a time and try to make every second good and not worry about what may or may not happen tomorrow. I woke up last night at 3am and couldn't not get back to sleep because I couldn't stop thinking about it. If I continue doing that then it will effect my life in a negitive way and that is not worth it.

Thanks for the advice and I will be watching the thread for more great advice. :thumbsup

Shoot the funny pic didn't show.

You'll have to click it.

http://www.iballer.com/wallpaper/cel...24x768_jpg.jpg

:1orglaugh

OMG that is so fucking funny! :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Bullies keep in mind. Do not mess with the calm quiet types who have access to your coffee or other edibles. :winkwink:

A mate of mine is pretty much the same as how you described yourself. People always try and take advantage of him/ bully him. He's pretty good in that he just ignores it, but at te same time he also gets bullied into a heap of different things.

FWIW i'd simply be completely honest with the person. Tell them you don't like what they are doing.

ill beat anyone up for 10 bucks

just pay my airfare

Piss on my foot, we're fuckin'.

Us people that are laid back let it fester inside us cause we are many times to calm to even raise our voice without cracking a smile. If it were someone you could get away from, then I would. I would tell them they are being an asshole and I am leaving, they probably won't see me for awhile. If it were someone I was stuck around every day, I would tell them I simply do not like them at this moment and ignore them. Tell them they are pissing you off and you will knock the gull stones out of them if they continue to be a prick.

I know you are right...time to shit or get off the pot.

no worries hon...it is good when more than one person gets something out of threads like these.

grow a backbone :2 cents:

I have one but when you are dealing with some issues it is more than that.

Is someone picking on you? Who's the MOFO I'm gonna kick some ass!!! :winkwink:

I have friends in London, buy two bags of cement and we'll solve the problem, couple of more bodies at the bottom of Temsa wont make any difference ;)

That is what I am doing but then comes the bad mouthing behind my back to other people which hurts me so bad. I cry about it quite often. I don't deserve it and I know I don't. But I guess there are people in the world that just like to bash people to make themselves feel better, or think if they bash people to other people then the person they are talking to will think they are cool or funny and they will be accepted. :disgust