Family Guy funny quotes
 

Stewie: "What's the number? What is it? Oh yes, I remember now. 867-5309. What? Oh, DAMN YOU TOMMY TUTONE!"

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I have never watched 1 single episode yet, I think I should start

Do they have it on planet bot?

huh???????

You should, the Family Guy is fucking funny :2 cents: :1orglaugh

I love watchin that show, its funny as hell

I got the first 3 seasons on dvd for my birthday, I'm sorry I didn't start watching it sooner. It the funniest "NOT FOR KIDS" cartoon on TV

Stewie to Lois: "For every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you!"

I am going to start watching it

Peter uses life savings to buy volcano insurance.

Lois: Stares at Peter

Peter: If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.

Beats the Simpsons easily. One of the funniest shows ever. There are lines in every episode.

i guess i should start watchin now...:1orglaugh

Guy on Airplane: "Oh great, I always end up sitting next to a damn baby."
Stewie: "What did you just say?"
Lois: "Stewie, stop fussing."
Stewie: "Pipe down Lois." (Slaps guy on head) "Hey big man, turn around. Oh you can't hear me now. I was going to watch the movie, but forget it. For the next 5 hours, your my bitch."

http://www.familyguyquotes.com/chara...in-quotes.html

Lois: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different.
Stewie: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankels behind your ears that would ring a few bells.

I bet you lost your virginity to a mechanical bull.

Dammit I missed this one.

"If I'm a child that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if i'm going stand here and take this from a pervert."

Auctioner: Our first item is a pair of panties confiscated from a prostitute.
Quagmire: Fifty bucks.
Auctioner: She had nine STDs.
Quagmire: Forty-five bucks.
Auctioner: And when we caught her she wet herself.
Quagmire: Fifty bucks.

Peter to Lois: "If I have to sit thru this than I get anal tonight." while sitting thru a ceremony lauding Joe.

hahahaha .. that one is great.

Brian: Peter, did you read the fine print on this loan contract?
Peter: Um, if by "read" you mean imagined a naked lady, then, yes.

Quagmire: You must be this beautiful to ride the Quagmire.

Quagmire:

"Hey Meg, 18 yet?"

LOL

ahahaha i forgot about that one!

(Adam West is marrying his hand)
Priest: If anyone has any reason as to why this marriage should not take place, speak now or forever hold your peace.
(Adam West's other hand raises up)
Adam West: Shut up, you had your chance!

Peter: Lois, less talkie more fetchie.

gigity gigity....lol

Stewie at Brian's Mom's "Burial"..."I never knew Biscuit as a dog, but I did know her as a table."

Peter: "I've got an idea! An idea so great my head would explode if I even began to know what I was thinking about"

I love that show, it is too funny.

Bonnie: Somebody save him, he can't swim!
Peter: Oh, he's not even kicking. Kick Joe, kick.
Lois: Peter, he's a paraplegic!
Peter: That doesn't mean he can't hear. Kick Joe, kick!

I just got the Untold Stewie Griffin movie. Very funny and some raunchy shit.

Best ever.. Stewie: "What the Deuce!""

CLASSIC !! :1orglaugh

Stewie (to one of the prostitutes at Cleveland's house): So, is there any tread left on the tires? Or at this point would it be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?

Stewie: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch.

Steve Lightspeed has time for TV? Interesting.

Get back to work slacker!! :P


Stewie (in car with Brian, says to police officer): We met on the Internet. He lured me into the car with promises of candy and funny stories.

I just watched the movie yesterday. While not as good as the series it was still hilarious

Peter: So uhh, Mr. Pewterschmidt, the big race is tomorrow eh? Bet you're gonna need some strapping men to help you with your boat.
Mr. Pewterschmidt: Are you calling me gay?
Peter: No. No. I just; I just thought you might want some extra seamen on your poopdeck.


:1orglaugh

Ok, so where did you all get the movie: stewie: the untold story? I have been trying to get it and I can't find it at all.