This Should Steam A Few Peoples Beans
 

New Don't Tell Me How To Ruin My Life - this post will surely steam some peoples beans, but fuck it, I have nothing to lose at this point. Believe it or not, I held around 90% back. So if anyone wants to think about retribution, I got something for that ass. Maybe after reading this, you can better understand my manic depression - The Decline Part 2: Atlanta - Don't Tell Me How To Ruin My Life

What's up fuu!

Just getting acclimated to homelessness

I prefer my beans baked

http://www.madspiders.com/images/blockedsite.jpg

http://www.madspiders.com/images/blockedsite2.jpg
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jay is such a fucking failure, it's hilarious :1orglaugh

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh ...

Werent able to sell that house before you lost it?

poor me im homeless, i hav nothing whaa whaa
https://www.stayathomemum.com.au/wp-...10/tantrum.jpg


wonder how mny time jay cry

Shortsale...kinda

Remind me to never ever piss off xxxJay.

LOL...I am the most mellow person on Earth

What is the highest amount of money you had in the bank / investment account at one time?

Have luck Jay.

A thought and a question.

First the question: You say you moved out there to be part of this affiliate program and it was actually a pay cut then a little later you say you were bought out for a fraction of what your shares in the company were worth. Why do either of these? I can maybe see moving out to join them if you thought you would make less now, but more in the long run, but when it all went to shit why not sue and get what you really owed you (maybe you did and that just isn't in this post)?

The thought, and this is just my opinion. When writing something don't go on for several hundred words detailing how shitty people are and how they fucked you over then make the statement, "The point is, I don’t give a fuck." Clearly you give enough of a fuck to write a blog post about it then post that blog post on a board. When you do something like that it undermines everything else you have written.

That is actually two questions but....

1. By working on the affiliate programs I couldn't put the amount of time I was putting it into my own business which I was 100% owner of

2. It was either take what they were offering or take nothing

When you get involved with lawyers the only people that women are the lawyers

No, you misunderstood me. When I said I don't give a fuck, I was saying I don't give a fuck if they sue me because I don't have anything that they can take.

I think that is where you were confused

Jay what is holding you back now? What would you say is your major obstacle?

Nothing really, I just had to hit the reset switch on my entire life. I'm slowly getting affiliate income from mainstream mostly... It's just like restarting back nearly 20 years ago

I guess I wonder then why you took the deal. I'm just curious what made you decide to walk away from your own thing and join something else where you made less. It sounds like you may not have had much of a choice, is that the case?


That makes sense.

And thanks for the answers.

I didn't walk away from my own thing, when I came to help out OC cash it started to use up a lot of my resources. My main developer hated the other guys OC cash so much he refused to work for them no matter how much they paid him.

So, that hurt my core business.

I think the lesson is if you could do a project without any partners you were a lot better off, Because I was working a lot harder then the rest of the guys.

But Again, I should've addressed that much earlier, but I felt like the "new guy"

Makes sense. Thanks for the info.

I remember when jaysxxxlinks used to own the serps. $700,000/year sounds about right. :thumbsup

Reset switch? you and me both. Except women were my downfall.

I now have 2 beautiful kids who are priceless and we cherish each other every day so no matter how bad my downfall was, my 2 children were worth it. :kisskiss

It's just money really.:2 cents:

you can bounce back. This is the real test. :)

Jay, was any part of your downward spiral your responsibility?

I remember your thread about letting your link network go, I contacted you about picking it up but never heard back.

I totally can't understand where you are coming from there. Of course, some of it was my responsibility. I also hit a really bad string of bad luck

1. Almost got killed by that Chris Hayes motherfucker for doing absolutely nothing. And when I say doing absolutely nothing I mean nothing. In fact, and before that point I was always friendly with the guy ended never had a problem with him. My ex-girlfriend locked the door at a party and apparently that steamed his beans and I guess that's why I deserved to almost die.

2. I got tuberculosis. It's airborne. There was nothing I could've done to prevent that. My lame ass business partners rather than backing me on the whole Chris Hayes thing and the tuberculosis actually blamed me for it.

3. I got into a shitty relationship with a porn chick. That was my bad. It brought out the worst in me. I did the right thing and ended it. At that point, my life wasn't in a downword spiral because I corrected it.

JC ran off to Europe with Kenny on the company dime and without even telling me and I guess they made the deal out there to get rid of me.

Kenny obviously sucks as a marketer because from all the publicly available information the Empire I had bill for those assholes went to shit.

Add to that, they were my friends (my business partners)... Personally, when I see your friend in trouble I try to talk to them and try to help. After you spend a decade working with people even if I was fucking up massively, Which in my opinion I wasn't... They never took me aside and said I should chill out... They just looked at disposing of me as a way to increase their pockets.

They all suck, each and everyone of them greedy fucking assholes

Yeah, I've mentioned that in the posts just before yours. I had one woman in my life that was very bad for me

it was a reasonable question, i read the blog entry and didn't gather from it that you felt you were integral to where you are now.

the biggest thing i'm curious about now is which 2 guitars did you keep?

fucking shit!!! god damn fix the bullshit fucking sites!:mad:

no disrespect, speaking with honesty. anyone who has seen your blog, your fb, your prior posts here is pretty aware you struggle with addiction. a lot of the time it seems to be winning.

no shame in that, getting well is a process.

just know that anyone who actually respects you and is intelligent enough to have business that would be of mutual benefit knows that as well, and would be crazy to work with you until you have your issues under control.

you can't build a business or recover from what you've lost tangibly when you revert back to chemicals any time things get rough. when you don't spend a good stint focusing on kicking the ish that brought you to this point in the first place.

get your life together. fuck that, create a new life as you move beyond the crutches you've relied upon thus far. make that your first priority.

'bad luck' is going to follow you until you get the addictions beat. you can do that, just don't see how pretending that you being in a new location with new blog posts furthers that.

stop fucking around. get clean. get control of your life. it's hard but far easier than uh, all this

wish you all the best, but for real, stop fucking around and pretending one good day/good week is going to fix your life. it won't. until you rewire your brain through a really tough stint of non-chemical living it will be rough, but worth it in the long run. or you can be dead in 5-10 years, if you're lucky. seen enough peeps go down this round, we all know how it ends up.

yo choice son.

amani na wanaotaka wewe afya njema/wishing you peace and good health

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:1orglaugh:1orglaugh What is Jay trying to inject us with???

See, that is the kind of thing I wish I had heard from my (friends / partners) before everything came to a head like this. I don't care if anyone believes this but around six years ago I contracted tuberculosis somehow. For those of you who don't know, it's not some kind of disease you get from sharing needles, it's airborne. I was on a hard-core regimen of medication to get rid of it for eight months and the drugs were so toxic to my liver I was completely straight for eight months.

During that time, I started to enjoy not waking up with a headache or throwing up. So even after I got off my medication outside of smoking pot I stayed sober for probably another six months. That was up until I met my ex-girlfriend who was a complete alcoholic. I started drinking again and went for it pretty hard for the eight months or whatever we were together.

The difference between her and I were was: I worked for a living, but she would start pounding the Jaeger as soon as she woke up. One day I asked, "isn't it annoying when you go to bars and you haven't been drinking and everyone else's drunk?"

She said "yes"

Then I told her that's what she was making every day of my life like. She said she would chill out, but she never did so we broke up. By that point I was sick and tired of even being around alcohol.

While all that was going on, my business partners I Had been on a campaign telling everyone in the industry how much of an addict I was, even though at the time I was basically sober.

Once everything had gone down and I had nothing to do. I decided if they wanted to paint a picture of me as being some kind of alcoholic and drug addict, I might as well be an alcoholic and drug addict and that was the period of maybe a year you would see the erratic posts etc.

Fact is, I have two speeds I am either completely sober or I drink one beer and then I will keep drinking till I blackout.

Now, I realize that, so for the most part (outside of special occasions) I don't even drink. Now that I don't live in LA, I don't have quack doctors to prescribe me Xanax and I'm totally off of that as well.

The only thing I really do smoke pot. If that makes me an addict then guilty as charged.:pimp

blaming people 4 own addiction , you are in fucking denial get help , u die soon!

Is that a death threat?

much love kiddo from one human to another but this is what matters:

you're admitting that you can't handle substances. that is awesome.

so fucking stop

the rest is noise, excuses, reasons.....

just fucking stop and start fresh.

it won't be easy, when I wrote about rewiring your brain that wasn't a metaphor.

this won't be easy, but you have two choices; easy road that leads to more of the misery you know will kill you, or a really hard road to something new that can save your life, wherein you can carve something that really means something beyond the next high. we get one go around, you know you can do better than this.

being real everything you write is textbook addict, like there's something cool or valiant about destroying yourself? there is nothing admirable about what you've been experiencing.

serves no one, not you and certainly not those who love you. again, just being real.

if you take nothing else from this: fall out of love with your own self-pity

and start fucking fighting for what both you and your peeps deserve

I don't consider weed to be a drug per se but if you're trying to get clean at the very least use it sparingly. the whole point is to be able to engage as a happy, vibrant, productive, loving person in this world right? can't do that if you need ish to get fucked up to get through the day

you clearly have the intelligence to do this, so make the choice.

hope you choose the right one.

Okay, here is where I disagree with you strongly. I'm honest. That's a good quality.

Two of my business partners that were condemning me for being a drug addict how do far larger problem with narcotics than I ever had.

When you are being chastised for being a drug addict by people who are bigger drug addicts than you, therein lies the problem

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daayuummm

^^^^a massive wall of text really helps here. fuck me, even I gave up half way through.

btw if you're going to copy/paste only fair to cite your source. piracy exists beyond porn.

doubt my posts will really help either, but at least they might be read?

being chastised by peeps who have more severe drug addictions that you (insane thinking, so there are now degrees of addiction??) does not negate your own issues. that's like a ponzi thief stating 'well, Madoff was worse'. so they're sick too, how is this relevant to you at this point?

for real, from the outside the though processes/(il)logic of addicts would be be hilarious were it not so serious.

don't know the back story on this, nor do I care. it's completely irrelevant. just more noise and again, completely textbook.

said my piece. you can explain/excuse/accuse others or you can get well. yo call.

sincerely wish you the best. bowing out now.

This isn't an NA or AA message board. This board is about pornography, you can just talk about one narrow aspect other subject and ignore the rest.

I would rather be a drug addict and a hypocrite any day.

Luckily for me, I'm neither