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-   -   I can never look at my neighbor the same again. (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=1032995)

kane 08-05-2011 03:36 AM

I can never look at my neighbor the same again.
 
I had lunch with my brother this afternoon. We get back and are out front of my house standing by his truck talking. My neighbor comes out and asks if we could do her a favor. She asks of we could move a couch from her living room to her back bedroom. She is getting a new one delivered tomorrow and is making room for it. No problem. We go in and the couch is not heavy, just a little awkward, but we are only moving it about 20 feet. As we pass her bedroom on our way down the hall her door is half open and I glance in. Her bed is unmade and I notice that she has what is probably a 12-14 inch long black dildo laying on her bed next to her pillow. I nearly dropped my end of the couch.

My neighbor is probably in her late 50's or even early 60's. She is about 5 foot 2 and maybe 100 pounds. Who would have guessed that she liked giant black cock. Now every time I see her I am going to wonder if she broke out the blackzilla dick the night before.

~Ray 08-05-2011 03:43 AM

cougars like meat

Markul 08-05-2011 03:45 AM

hahaha awesome! :)

Paul Markham 08-05-2011 03:56 AM

Ask her if you can come over and help her, or film her. LOL

buildingfutures 08-05-2011 03:57 AM

Hahah, that's an actual cool story bro.

CurrentlySober 08-05-2011 04:04 AM

Sorry, but why shouldn't your ADULT neighbour, be able too enjoy a healthy, normal, sex life / fetish, in the privacy of her own home?

WebCashMaker 08-05-2011 04:06 AM

http://captionsearch.com/pix/thumb/i34tnaohjy-t.jpg

Cool Story Bro !

brassmonkey 08-05-2011 04:10 AM

maybe you should go over and break her off a piece.

ruff 08-05-2011 04:18 AM

She left it there knowing you would see it. She's looking for the real thing and here you are writing about it on GFY. You need to be knocking on her front door!

Chosen 08-05-2011 05:20 AM


Choopa Phil 08-05-2011 05:59 AM

i literally LOL'd

martinsc 08-05-2011 06:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ruff (Post 18333094)
She left it there knowing you would see it. She's looking for the real thing and here you are writing about it on GFY. You need to be knocking on her front door!

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

PornoStar69 08-05-2011 06:32 AM

Take a photo of your neighbor we wanna see what she looks like.

seeandsee 08-05-2011 07:02 AM

come on, fuck her with your monster cock

beerptrol 08-05-2011 07:25 AM

It's obvious that "move a couch" was code for a "threesome with big black dildo action thrown in".

L-Pink 08-05-2011 07:32 AM

Great, you both have something in common ..... :1orglaugh

.

brassmonkey 08-05-2011 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by L-Pink (Post 18333393)
Great, you both have something in common ..... :1orglaugh

.

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

SmokeyTheBear 08-05-2011 09:23 AM

i have almost identical story lol..

these 2 older ladies who i assume are lesbians asked me and my friend to move a large desk down stairs when they were moving, they had taped the drawers shut so they wouldn't fly out while we were carrying it downstairs , but they used that crappy clear tape so as not to take the finish off the desk. But sure enough halfway down the stairs the bottom drawer flies open and spills out a pile of gay porn magazines, they were mostly focused on hardcore black s&m porn, my buddy nearly shit himself trying to scoop them back into the drawer before they came back in.. I was busting myself laughing as i'm sure although akward they wouldn't have really cared..

halfpint 08-05-2011 09:27 AM

It was left on the bed for a reason. She wanted you to see it :) I think she has a crush on you :)

PR_Glen 08-05-2011 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paul Markham (Post 18333065)
Ask her if you can come over and help her, or film her. LOL

late 50's early 60's man come on!

SmokeyTheBear 08-05-2011 09:32 AM

http://www.linkognito.com/images/07-25-08/dildo.gif

SmokeyTheBear 08-05-2011 09:33 AM

http://a-p.ath.cx/capit/640-~-480-~-...ction+dude.jpg

JamesGw 08-05-2011 09:47 AM

You need to hit that.

cooldude7 08-05-2011 10:06 AM

it was signal dude, u gotta fuck her hard.,

cutedimples 08-05-2011 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Choopa Phil (Post 18333208)
i literally LOL'd

Me too! Hahaha :laughing-:laughing-:laughing-

Spunky 08-05-2011 10:19 AM

They all want Mandingo cock

cutedimples 08-05-2011 10:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spunky (Post 18333781)
They all want Mandingo cock

:laughing-:laughing-:laughing-

Compare sizes w Mandingo:

http://www.thevisualiser.net/index.php?rt=visualiser

cherrylula 08-05-2011 10:37 AM

No reshitting? That would have been a good story.

You guys totally missed your chance to pull a train on that ho. :1orglaugh

move a couch... yeah suuuure. LOL

Cougar Bang Fail!

DoubleD 08-05-2011 10:38 AM

haha well she's probably accomplished a lot in her life, wants that feeling of accomplishment to continue...

Sid70 08-05-2011 10:43 AM

You still masturbate? So she does, but remember she doesnt have a cock!

JosephFM 08-05-2011 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PornoStar69 (Post 18333266)
Take a photo of your neighbor we wanna see what she looks like.

I second that!

NaughtyRob 08-05-2011 11:38 AM

Sounds like she wanted you to see it.

kane 08-05-2011 11:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CurrentlySober (Post 18333074)
Sorry, but why shouldn't your ADULT neighbour, be able too enjoy a healthy, normal, sex life / fetish, in the privacy of her own home?

She can do whatever she wants. The reason I was shocked it twofold. First, she seems like a very conservative, uptight kind of person. She is one of those people that when you see them or talk to them you never imagine that they could have had or do have a sex life. Second, the neighbor that lives on the other side of me is a gay guy. When he moved in she wrote the local paper warning that if the city allows this that the gay could "take over" the city. She had always been nice to me, but then I started (and still am) dating an Asian girl and she sometimes looks at us like she doesn't approve because it is interracial. So the last thing I expected was a big black dildo.

kane 08-05-2011 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PornoStar69 (Post 18333266)
Take a photo of your neighbor we wanna see what she looks like.

I will see what I can do. I swear if you looked up "little old lady" in the dictionary they would have her picture. If I get a chance to get a shot of her I will snap it and post it.

Socks 08-05-2011 12:29 PM

I was at a female friend's house once as a teenager, who lived with two lesbians. She decided to go into their nightstand drawer, and the dildos weren't the surprise.

They had like a little metal kitchen tray hooked up to some kind of electrical device with wires and alligator clips... Next to the dildos.

96ukssob 08-05-2011 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PornoStar69 (Post 18333266)
Take a photo of your neighbor we wanna see what she looks like.

yea yea yea! do it!!!

PornStarToys 08-05-2011 12:50 PM

Get a photo of her using it

kane 08-05-2011 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Socks (Post 18334084)
I was at a female friend's house once as a teenager, who lived with two lesbians. She decided to go into their nightstand drawer, and the dildos weren't the surprise.

They had like a little metal kitchen tray hooked up to some kind of electrical device with wires and alligator clips... Next to the dildos.

Now that is a little bit shocking lol

bean-aid 08-05-2011 02:49 PM

Ask her if she uses that blackzilla dick for anal excitement as well

Eyeball 08-05-2011 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beaner (Post 18334502)
Ask her if she uses that blackzilla dick for anal excitement as well

Or be a real man next time and sniff it.


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