Just saw Karate Kid...where's my gun?

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  • CamJack
    Old School Webmaster
    • Sep 2003
    • 1334
    #1

    Just saw Karate Kid...where's my gun?

    Went to the drive in with my 9 year old son. I am excited to see him finally be interested in a real movie and not some retarded pokemon/craptoon movie.....

    What a long setup....

    First ten seconds...growth chart...ok ok ok date dad dies...now I laugh WAA WAA..

    Detroit single mom sent to China for the auto industry? HMMMM...ok
    Little shithead cant hang coat on hanger....hmmm I smell a recurring theme

    Is this movie a realmake, prequel, alternate universe to the old karate kid.

    Ok fly with chopsticks...an homage....wait flyswatter...hahahah funny, not

    Love interest...ok yellow Elizabeth Shue, I get it....so boring

    Horrible acting...horrible. Villian kid is not evil enough...he needed a tat or funky haircut.

    35 minutes in...GREAT fighting....Jackie Chan fights 12 year olds BUT he rigs it so they hit each other....mighty clever.

    Training .....drop coat, hang coat, wear coat......THATs the WAX ON parallel....or is it to teach the little shit to hang his coat.

    They keep going....oh man...12 minutes of coat hanging. I get it...when's the little fuck gonna question this...ok now....whoa HE"S A KUNG FU MASTER!!!!!!!!!!!

    The "rocky style" training was good. Better than original. More stuff...not enough of it. Everytime DRE had to talk to the girl....took forever and it was classic Will Smith.

    I liked the tournament, but overall what a piece of shit.

    I WILL GIVE CREDIT TO THE KID....he knew his shit....there were moments of some cool ninja like moves.
    Skype: promote.promote
    [email protected]
    Tags: dumb, karate kid, movies, smith
    • fatfoo
      ICQ:649699063
      • Mar 2003
      • 27763
      #2
      To make a good movie, the scenes have to be cut with their right time increments. There should be an interesting story line of some kind. The audience needs to be excited and interested in something.

      Originally posted by geoGUERILLA
      retarded pokemon
      There are different kinds of pokemon. They all have different power levels. Some of them are retarded and some of them are genius. It is quite hilarious. You have to look at the game card to see the stats.
      Send me an email: [email protected]

        Comment

        • ShellyCrash
          Confirmed User
          • Jun 2004
          • 6708
          #3
          Kudos for taking your kid to the drive-in, gotta keep it alive!

          Sorry you had to sit through that POS though. In another year or two the movies he will want to watch will probably become alot more bearable.

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            • PornstarXS
              Confirmed User
              • May 2007
              • 358
              #4
              so it was Jane and Finch meets Spadina kungfu
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                Comment

                • seeandsee
                  Check SIG!
                  • Mar 2006
                  • 50945
                  #5
                  Originally posted by fatfoo
                  To make a good movie, the scenes have to be cut with their right time increments. There should be an interesting story line of some kind. The audience needs to be excited and interested in something.



                  There are different kinds of pokemon. They all have different power levels. Some of them are retarded and some of them are genius. It is quite hilarious. You have to look at the game card to see the stats.
                  Karate Pokemon kid would be better movie for sure
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                    Comment

                    • sicone
                      Retired
                      • Jan 2004
                      • 18453
                      #6
                      so we go from wax on, wax off, to jacket on, jacket off.

                      At least they keep the sexual play on words going

                        Comment

                        • EliteWebmaster
                          Confirmed User
                          • Feb 2010
                          • 3990
                          #7
                          What do you expect, you have Jackie Chan and Jaden Smith. That's enough to make me puke all by itself. Worst movie franchise ever, and they did a remake.

                          Crap in = Crap out

                            Comment

                            • crazytrini85
                              Confirmed User
                              • Jun 2006
                              • 817
                              #8
                              Was there a montage in it?

                                Comment

                                • Va2k
                                  I’m still alive barley.
                                  • Oct 2001
                                  • 10060
                                  #9
                                  The trailers look good too me, but im weird and like movies that are kinda of strange too!

                                    Comment

                                    • CaptainHowdy
                                      Too lazy to set a custom title
                                      • Dec 2004
                                      • 94727
                                      #10
                                      The remake has to be as bad as the original...

                                        Comment

                                        • CamJack
                                          Old School Webmaster
                                          • Sep 2003
                                          • 1334
                                          #11
                                          The couple montages I liked. Alot like Rocky training. The training methods were a little creative. Them trying to make a 12 year old kid shredded and oiled up with olive oil was funny.
                                          Skype: promote.promote
                                          [email protected]

                                            Comment

                                            • TurboAngel
                                              H.B.I.C.
                                              • Jun 2003
                                              • 30122
                                              #12
                                              I'll wait till it comes out on cable.

                                                Comment

                                                • GTS Mark
                                                  Vrume Mark
                                                  • Jan 2001
                                                  • 20912
                                                  #13
                                                  Did Johnny sweep the leg?

                                                    Comment

                                                    • d-null
                                                      . . .
                                                      • Apr 2007
                                                      • 13724
                                                      #14
                                                      with the way kids are being trained in MMA from a young age, the original Karate Kid's one foot jumping kick finishing move would get him slaughtered in the 2010 world we live in

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                                                        • Pics Traffic
                                                          Confirmed User
                                                          • Jun 2004
                                                          • 3055
                                                          #15
                                                          Now that we have this movie out I want to see Chinese Malcom-X movie.
                                                          My Network Is Waiting For Your Fuckin' Trade!

                                                            Comment

                                                            • Poindexterity
                                                              Confirmed User
                                                              • Feb 2008
                                                              • 882
                                                              #16
                                                              i have a couple issues with this flick right from the jump off.
                                                              a- jackie chan is chinese and the movie takes place in china, the home of kung fu, not karate. that being said, they HAD to call this shit karate kid? like if they came up with some new title, no one would get it or something. as though we're all too stooopid to wrap our minute little brains around so much as a new title, let alone a new concept.
                                                              b- the whole thing just seems like some early conditioning to get americans, especially black americans (the ones most likely to be on the front lines of a ground war) used to the idea of fighting the chinese.
                                                              no sig

                                                                Comment

                                                                • Manowar
                                                                  jellyfish  
                                                                  • Dec 2003
                                                                  • 71528
                                                                  #17
                                                                  yeah i dont get why they called it the karate kid when its kung fu

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