Yes, my friend, being 21 and still in college you DONT really know what you want.

From being married to Mrs Kornfield for a few years now, you have to remember some basic things...

1. Will this person stick with me no matter what happens to us, such as loosing a job and suddendly your cash is not there as your had it, one gets a major sickness and takes a while to mend, etc.

2. Can I accept them for who they are today and also keep my mind open to accept them for who they become, everyone changes as time goes on and this ideal can be a sticky area for some.

3. Can I place their needs above mine and make that sacrifice to go without at times?

4. Can I put nothing above our love as "more important" to me as a person?, after you are married you are now one. not 2.

If you can say yes to these things with honesty, then I say take the plunge. Waiting is good for a bus, paint to dry or a pizza. Good luck and enjoy, post wedding pics.

If you cant say yes to these with honesty, then I would take stock of the situation that is at hand. Remember, there are times in life that we are all dealt INCREDIBLE tests and our mate being there will make all the difference to us, even if its only to listen to you bitch and moan about people they dont know or understand why you WANT to know them.

If your mate cant make the commitment to you 100% to be there and love you, respect you, nuture, etc. Then you need to wait on this more. If she wants to bail on you cause of this, then let her. If she is cool with this then I would really engage for a bit, live together, and then ratchet it up from there.

I met Mrs Korfiend July 4th weekend, we moved in 5 days later, got engaged month after that and have been married 3 years now, looking at 4th year. Never a problem in terms of our commitment to each other, but, LOTS of really interesting shit life has dealt us that tested the sanity and reslience of each other. At the end of the day, we made it and will make it no matter what.

That is what you need in a partner. No matter what, you are in it to win it and aint no questions bout it.

lates!

Herb K

Yup...the age has a lot to do with it. I am sure you are a great guy and treat her as well as she treats you but at the age of 21 (again take from a chick that knows) she is testing her wings. Seeing how much she can get away with, manipulate and the idea that she is messing wth someone elses life has little to no consquence.
She is not trying to fuck with you, but doesn't understand that how badly she is.
Again this is only from my experience. Good Luck...don't rush and hey are you going to be in Vegas? After all this crap you are going to need a big hug :angel

I wish I could go to Vegas. The money I have right now is going to Christmas bills, and buying content and scripts for a few new projects I'm starting in January.

Money is all tied up for now. I'm hoping to go in 2004, unless I get a break before January.

Oh well, the new projects I'm working on should do quite well, so 2004 is pretty much set in stone now.

I'll be back in a bit... going to see about getting a new tattoo. ;)

FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!
I spoke to her, it's worse than I could have ever imagined.

Gotta love that, my fiance and I went through ALOT of bullshit in the first year, breakups, sex friends, breakups, neverw anna see each other again, going steady, breakups, going steady, moving in, breaking up, sleeping ins ame bed again, got new place together to start fresh, engaged, moved again cause landlord hated us, still engaged and happy 3.5 years later :)

SOmetimes you need to go through a year of hell to get a lifetime of heaven.

why would you blame women for your failed relationships? it takes two... and you chose the relationship too. my guess would be that you have been in many chaotic relationships in the past and this is a pattern that has repeated itself many times.

if you only blame others, you have to change others to correct the problem... thats problematic for obvious reasons. blame yourself and you suddenly have the power to make immediate change and improvement in your life.

Status report... ?

BTW HerbK good advice... after all you have been through I'm willing to listen :)

She thinks she's pregnant.

:Hollering :eek2 :uhoh did you get one of those "do it yourself" tests" ?

Ouch. Good luck with this situation dude. You'll need it.

Blame it on Santa!

She's going to take the test sometime in the next couple of days.

And you still dont think someone else is involved?

This is textbook version homie.

Sucks.

I know bro. It does suck. I've been through a similar situation before... but, the girl LIED about being pregnant to get me back, then faked a miscarriage.

I don't think she's faking though. And I am 75% sure that there isn't anyone else, just because before all of this stuff happened, we spent almost all of our time together.

There could have been someone else, just not too likely.

But, ya never know with chicks these days.

she's tripped because she thinks she's pregnant. My fiance broke up with me and bitched me out for a whole day just because she thought she was pregnant. For some reason young chicks freak out and take it out on us guys when they get preggers.

Hey SNIPER !!!
I won't be in Vegas Baby, but I will put you on my partner's list of people he should hook up with !! His name is VID VICIOUS, he is formerly of WRP/Carol Cox, you may know him ??

Anyways baby, I am always up to a hug from you ... lets do lunch sometime after vegas ... :thumbsup

VooDoo :

That blows d00d ! I had my wife break up with me on my BIRTHDAY when we were first dating ... I know how it feels ...

But one thing I have learned in my 33 years brother, keep your chin up ... Life is a journey full of many stepping stones. This is just one step you had to take to get you to the next level ... it does get better ... I had to go thru the wringer TWICE before I finally found the most AMAZING woman in the world !!! Even though my Xmas was rather low key this year, it was one of my best, because I shared it with her !! :winkwink:

VooD:

My girl is 20 - in college, she has done the same exact fucking thing with me; 4 times.

It's hell, and like iwantchixx said; sometimes you gotta deal with that to see what the outcome will be.

I'll give you what I used to ease my mind about the situation the last time it happened to me. Go to www.askmen.com and really read a lot of the dating advice articles on there. It's a lot of very insightful stuff and it's kind of empowering to hear from a psychologist about how fucked up women just naturally can be.

If you wanna B.S. about it, you know the ICQ.

http://us.imdb.com/Title?0269341 http://ia.imdb.com/media/imdb/01/I/93/74/80m.jpg

It's a good movie actually. Be sure to watch it :thumbsup

Umm maybe that reason is because we ocassionally say things like "Don't worry baby, I'll pull out" only to follow up 9 hours later with "oops".... a lot of women (who don't understand men & how incapable we are to think straight with a hard on) take this personally -- like because we accidentally slipped up, we don't care about them, respect them or thier wishes. And come to think of it.. in this situation, maybe they are right :cool-as-a


:1orglaugh lol, 9 hours :)

falling asleep part way through then continuing 8 hours and 55 minutes later does NOT count:winkwink:

UPDATE:

PHEW!!!! I'm a happy free man now!
She's not prego... and is still being a bitch. So, I am just going to be single. WOOHOO!!!!

Thanks for all of the advice/input peepz!

<font size=+2>Why would you ever consider getting married to a girl that you only trust 75%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</font>

I trusted her 100% until she started pulling B.S. stuff. She was flirting with a bunch of guys when we were out in public. I started to not trust her after that.

It's all a thing of the past now though. Now I gotta see about, getting myself to Internext. :thumbsup

I heard some where that like 80% of all break ups happen during the winter...

if you make vegas, it will a good escape for a while.

and you can put her out of your mind, and enjoy, ----maybe it will all work out

I heard you made it up to the trap-----:)

Get ya single wig on Voodoo......Vegas is almost here

theFLY - See you in Vegas my brother!

Herb K

Yep... Made it to "The Trap". Had a few beerz, and met a few peepz. I bought a chic a rose, and talked with her for a while. She was pretty cute. ;)