Originally Posted by bauhaus (Post 15945076)

Eating chicken wings with the IRS outta some 'chubby' dudes trunk at 4am........boooooyah:pimp

Originally Posted by Drunken Duncan (Post 15945476)

Well here's the thing about Bob's story. I didn't actually get arrested the night before. I had just got out of jail but I didn't get arrested. We were at a house party the night before somewhere by 10th street. Party got broken up, my buddy who threw the party was gonna give me a ride home, asked me twice but I just kept saying "I will fucken kill you" so he decided to let me walk. So my mom lived near 1st street so I had like 10+ blocks to walk wasted. So I get to the police station on 6th street and "check myself in". I think I told them I was a danger to society. I wake up, in my own little cell. like WTF? I hear everyone else getting some slop they call breakfast and I want mine. Finally, someone opens my cell and throws my shoes down (which I later lost) and says, beat it, no charges filed. So, i get to thinking... BobG always throws a Fest pre-party and he only lives between 6th and 7th. So I mosey over there and get to drinkin. Saved myself 5 block walk each way.... the rest is pretty much how Bob described it.

Originally Posted by Chicks Delivery (Post 15945694)

Funny thread!

Originally Posted by MovieMaster (Post 15946302)

So post these stories anon.... and just use fake alias....

Originally Posted by DrinkingHARDEST (Post 15943679)

Marty you have to tell the story about your brother when he stayed with us at the hotel LOL!

That one was GOLD!!!!

Originally Posted by JayDeeZee (Post 15944931)

About a year and a half ago I woke up with a really bad hangover.

So bad that I said "I'll never drink again!"







....and still haven't.

Originally Posted by SBJ (Post 15947145)

good for you!

Well before last Dec 1st 2008 I would prolly tell a lot of hangover stories but dec 1st about 7am will forever change my life and i don't think i could ever talk about what happened that night other then to say..

I went out saturday night to have a few pitchers and jager bombs and ran into some people that i hadn't seen in 10 years or so.. I did over 6 pitchers of beer myself and no doubt 20+ shots most double shots of jager bombs or just about anything that i could get my hands on.. I can honestly say that I had alcohol poisoning and am lucky to be alive

Like I said i doubt i will ever tell the story of what happened around 7am that sunday but 9 days later i finally went to the doctor to see why i was still in pain and i was told to go to the hospital and from there i was examined and rushed from that hospital to a larger hospital a hour away via ambulance for a emergency surgery.. I spent 3 and a half weeks in the hospital and the first 10 days i was fighting for my life not able to get out of bed at all. I had 2 surgeries then and a follow up one the end of April and over $200k in hospital bills.

The night has forever changed my life and since that night i have not had a drink. I told myself that maybe after a year i will try to drink again but i'm not even sure if i should try cause the pain it would cause my family if they found out i ever drank again.

So that was my not great hangover story that happened a little over 7 mos ago now

Originally Posted by CarlosTheGaucho (Post 15947197)

Here's another one:

About 5 years ago we were having a little barbecue party - well in fact a little barbecue party in our version meant about three days of non stop drinking, we got a whole pig cut into a half to roast, about 4 kegs of beer and about a gazzillion of moonshine. It also means not more than 2 hours of sleep a day as anyone who would sleep is a fail, lots of good ol' rock music - and a lot of apetite for pranking.

So we had three guys coming over from the city, fashion gods that were never a part of any of our parties, as we usually looked like something between a 80's heavy metal and motorcycle gang reunion, but they were buddies of a friend of mine who let us do it in his cottage so that was all ok.

Well first they started to drink more then they could stand then especially one of them started to be a little annoying, he wasn't used to that much booze and behaved a little bit too easy around us old dogs, so we prepaired a little surprise for him.

This was like really wild place a little bit outside of civilisation, it had no classical toilet and all you had was this wooden shithouse where you praised the nature anytime you needed to take a dump.

The trick is - this was about 400 yards outside the cottage in the wood and there was also another wooden shithouse that wasn't functional. basically only the wooden construction.

So we fixed it just so it looks as inviting as possible, and placed it the way it would stand for a bit if someone enters, only the fashion gods were not aware this is bad, bad trap.

So the time has come and our easy friend needed to ease himself we shout "over there! don't forget the toilet paper with you!"

He's drunk and happy everything is in place, enters the trap, closes the door. sits down, starts his thing... then a massive display of gravitation as he leaned back the whole thing just fell back and he was upside down inside hanging in ... !

Such a disgrace - all the armani underwear everything disgraced, at the end we had to find him some clothes to wear for him, so he spent the rest of his stay in really old overalls we found there - talk about baptised through fire!

Originally Posted by Wiseman (Post 15948425)

No comment

Originally Posted by Wiseman (Post 15948425)

No comment

Originally Posted by SleazyDream (Post 15948498)

my worst hangover occurred the night after LA webmaster access - that night when DH rapped me. Yeah you know and remember it DH.......

Originally Posted by Bake (Post 15951947)

Cool contest DH , I have had a few hangover stories and might write one up.

Originally Posted by uno (Post 15953542)

You guys ever decide on a winner?

Originally Posted by sleazybunny (Post 15949738)

are we talking drinking stories or hangover stories?

Originally Posted by sleazybunny (Post 15949738)

are we talking drinking stories or hangover stories?

Originally Posted by uno (Post 15940907)

A few years ago I was in Bulgaria. My friend is rich by American standards(She's a trust fund kid who has grown up around europe, chicago, LA, NYC). She knew the upper echelon of society over there. One night we were drinking at this bar with some guy who owned it named "Toshko"(or similar). He was buying us drinks all night long, but I thought nothing of it since they were less than a dollar a drink aside from a passive "thanks".

That weekend we decided to head to the Black Sea in lieu of Greece to party since that guy invited us. We drove the 6 hours to the Black Sea from the capitol of Bulgaria, Sofia at around 130 mph the whole way. People were stopping us 3 hours into the drive to hug this guy. That should have sent up some flags, but I knew she knew some crazy important people there.

When we arrived, I didn't have to pay for food, drinks, hotel, drugs, nothing. That should have sent up some more warning flags.

We met with 2 guys who are friends with mystery guy who was paying for everything who had about a dozen bodyguards. They had a fleet of mercedes, 2 filled with just bodyguards and 2 passenger cars. The lead and trailing car had the bodyguards and drove in the middle of the road not letting anyone pass on either side.

We get to a club and the bodyguards form a path for us to walk through them directly into the club into a VIP area. When we got to our spot, the bodyguards formed a semi circle around us. They were pulling in hot girls for the guys and handsome men for the women.

We had huge bottles of top top shelf vodka and I was poured several very large glasses of straight vodka.

At this point one of the main guys pulled out a kilo of coke and put it right on the table in view of everyone. The best friend of the guy who was paying for everything, nicknamed "Coco" for a reason, pulled a knife with a blood groove out, cuts it open and starts bumping straight from the ki.

Up till this point I was fine with everything. More in awe than anything else. I pulled my friend aside and asked her WTF these people were. I'm cool with a lot. I was partying with mafia a few weeks before with a model friend in Budapest.

She informs me that "Toshko" was the grandson of the former dictator of Bulgaria for something like 40 years and he's one of the richest people in the country from stolen communist money. His best friend "Coco" was a hitman. The guys who had all the bodyguards were the top drug dealers in Bulgaria who got their shipments from over the Black Sea.

I asked her in a now very slurred voice whether or not she felt she should have informed me beforehand about any of this. I had been fucking with the hitman, making digs and jokes the whole time. She said she didn't think I'd mind.

Around this time things go dark after a few more large glasses of straight vodka.

I'm told I disappeared with 3 different girls over the course of the night. Was generally wild and that the drug dealers/hitman/communist monarchy grandson loved me and my "antics" (whatever they were, no one would tell me). I was told a lot of stories the next day about things that happened and I really wasn't able to seperate fact from fiction. All I know is everyone agreed the girls were hot.

I woke up miles away in my hotel room in my boxers having no clue how I got to my hotel, got in my room and got dressed. I was really that trashed.

The next day we moved to another party city on the Black Sea to hit some of the clubs Toshko owned. There were some disgustingly fat 40+ older guys with some of the hottest, least clothed women I'd ever seen.

They gave me ecstasy and kept feeding me alcohol in a similar fashion to the night before. We had our own VIP area and some kid kept coming up bothering one of the girls we were with. This was all in Bulgarian and I was trashed out of my gourd on alcohol and god knows what so it was translated later and then translated the next day as to what exactly transpired.

The girl told the kid to leave her alone. The kid left and came back several times. After the third time the hitman told him something akin to "if you bother her again you'll be sorry". The kid came back AGAIN! The hitman pulled out the same knife he was bumping coke off of straight off the kilo the night before. He stabbed the kid in the shoulder, put his knife away and sat back down. The bouncers came over, grabbed the kid and threw him on his face into the street.

The bouncers came back over, apologized and brought us a bottle of their best champagne and asked if we needed anything else and then apologized again. The rest of the night is kind of blurry. The hitman was my ride and he couldn't see straight he was so rocked. It's a miracle we got back to the hotel. I don't remember much besides a shitload of DUI crashes on the way back to the hotel.

The next morning we were watching Germany vs. Brazil in the world cup finals at some place that had the audacity to call itself a steak house. Everyone was still drunk and cracked out. The hitman and Toshko got into an argument about soccer and he pulled out the same knife again. He thrusted it towards Toshko's eyes and stopped millimeters before penetration, thrusted it a few more times and then just started laughing. I would have bet on Brazil to win, but was too afraid to win the bet at that point and I had still been ripping on the hitman even after i found out what he did for a living. I think he appreciated that.

Suffice it to say, each successive day I had the worst headache and hangover I've ever had in my life and after the entire weekend of crazy debauchery I felt like death.

There's more to the story, but I don't really feel like typing out the rest right now. :)

Originally Posted by AK (Post 15954473)

So what happened to Toshko?

Originally Posted by kane (Post 15990795)

I'm not proud of it, but here it goes.

I met this girl online about 5 years ago. We talked a few times and met once for lunch. So one Saturday night she calls me up and wants me to hook up with her at this bar. She is going to be moving to a new city in a few days and wants to have one last night of fun before the move.

We meet up and go to the bar where we proceed to drink way too much. We are kissing on each other and flirting. It is about 1am so we leave. Out in the parking lot we are kissing. She is wearing this thin sun dress. I reach down and grab her ass and realize she isn't wearing any panties under it. So I say, "No panties?" And she says, "Good girls wear panties....girls that want to get fucked don't."

We can't go back to her place and I live about 30 minutes away. We are both too drunk to drive anywhere so we walk across the street to this sleazy motel and get a room. As soon as the door closes it is on, but it doesn't last very long. I am drunk as hell and she is hot so I finish in like 45 seconds. I walk into the bathroom to take off the condom and clean up and by the time I come back out 2 minutes later she is passed out asleep. I crawl into bed next to her and pass out as well.

The next morning I woke to her giving me head. I open my eyes and feel fantastic, rested and relaxed. Now it is on for sure! We kick it off with a little oral action then I put on a condom and she gets on her hands and knees. I'm in rare form hitting it from behind when all of a sudden I break into a cold sweat and feel a sickness in my gut. The hangover hits me like a brick. I can't hold back. I thrust into her then vomit all over her back. It isn't a little puke. It is like something from The Exorcist. It is one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen. The vomit hits her like it was napalm dropped from a plane and splashes all over her, me and the bed. Some even got on the walls!

She freaks out (understandably) and so do I. I'm apologizing and grabbing her a towel. She is pissed, but trying to be cool as I tell her I must still be drunk or something. She goes into the bathroom and closes the door to clean up, yelling out that she is going to take a shower. I use a towel to wipe myself off, get dressed and haul ass out of there without saying another word to her. I have never heard from her again.

I know I am probably the story she tells all her friends when they are drinking and they want to hear about the one night stand she had where the guy upchucked on her. I wish her well, she deserves it after that night :)

Originally Posted by LadyMischief (Post 15990589)

I only ever got to have one true hangover in my life, as I no longer drink, and even if I was a drinker, I think that one night, I would have given it up anyways after that.....

So I was drinking vodka all night with my first husband in the form of screwdrivers. I was 18, young and dumb, and didn't realize that drinking really fast might not hit you with full drunk right away. We drank and drank and around 3 in the morning, the puking started. I was exhausted puking, and sick when I finally fell into a fitful sleep around 5 am. Of course, much to my chagrin, at around 8 am I was shaken awake (which urged another fit of retching) to be reminded that I had a full dress rehearsal that day. See, at that time, I was in a local children's musical theatre...cast in the roll of Miss Muffit, and as this was the last dress rehearsal before the show, I HAD to be there. Damn. So, puking all the way to the car, not just hungover, but still drunk, I managed to hold down the puke long enough to let my then-hubby to pull over so I could puke some more. We arrived at the studio, and I puked several more times on the way in... I didn't realize because I'd never been hung over before, that childrens music played very loud, as well as dancing in a lively fashion don't really go well with being hung over. I got through half a song and had to get out of my costume as quickly as possible on the way down the hall to the bathrooms to puke some more. I sat the rest of the rehearsal out on a couch in misery, my head under my coat and my hands over my ears. I don't think I ever want to hear the music from Babes in Toyland again, and I NEVER got that drunk again. Thank goodness!

Originally Posted by DrinkingHARDEST (Post 15990819)

Oh man that story sounds like a "penthouse letters" gone bad hahahaha!!! :1orglaugh

Originally Posted by kane (Post 15991156)

The funny thing about you saying that is when I first met her for lunch I thought she was really hot. Then I don't hear from her for about a week. I called her once and she never called me back. So I assumed she was not interested. Then she ICQ'd me a few times and we talked a couple of times. She never gave me the impression that she wanted anything more than a friend out of the deal. So when we are drinking and she kisses me a few times she tells me she gets really touchy feely when she gets drunk. No problem. When we are out in the parking lot and she tells me she wants me to fuck her I start thinking, "This is exactly how half the porn movies I have seen start." :)