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Welcome to the GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum forums. You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us. |
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| Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. |
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11-20-2002, 04:33 PM
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#1 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: us
Posts: 336
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Reasons Europe Sucks Ass
1.France
2.Socialists 3.Mr. Bean 4.The metric system 5.Really stinky cheese 6.Insane rates of taxation on gas 7.Ethnic Cleansing 8.Adolph Hitler 9.Slobodan Milosevic 10.Soccer 11.EuroDisney 12.The UK's Rail Roads (Are the UK rail lines really that crappy?) (ALL rail lines are crappy.) (People die on them all the time. There's no way your getting me on one of those death-worms - PC.) 13All the ass-sucking going on. 14.Designer Butt-Plugs from Milan. (I'm not making that up) 15.Unmowed female body hair 16.Lack of Good junk food. 17.Everyone over the age of 11 smokes. 18.Preponderance of Evil junk food. 19.The women in Sweden don't really wear bikinis in the winter. |
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11-20-2002, 04:38 PM
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 2,488
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 Let us get all overprotective and push this thread into 4 pages... yes... let us do that... Damn shame we don't have popcorn in Europe. Or at least, good popcorn. Anyone want a piece of really stinky cheese?  |
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11-20-2002, 04:39 PM
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#3 | |
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LAX Immigration
Posts: 2,940
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Quote:
 Betcha can't find it on a map though...  |
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11-20-2002, 04:41 PM
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March 1st, 2003
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Seat 4 @ Venetian Poker Room
Posts: 20,295
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11-20-2002, 04:43 PM
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#5 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: KAGAWA, Japan
Posts: 470
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Are we really to believe that ethnic cleansing, female body hair, Euro Disney, ass sucking, Adolf Hitler, Milosevic and taxation are all BAD?
Who would've thunk it?!
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sdfsdfsdvgf |
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11-20-2002, 04:46 PM
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#6 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Apr 2001
Posts: 8,245
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Quote:
Aaahahahhahaha! A great time was had by all. |
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11-20-2002, 04:49 PM
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#7 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 4,982
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How is Amtrak better than the UKs rail system?
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Surrender all your independent thinking and Click Here for re-programming. |
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11-20-2002, 04:49 PM
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#8 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: us
Posts: 336
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Quote:
I have been there few times. I like France but hate racist french people.In my opinion, France would be perfect if there weren't any french people there. They were unbelievably MEAN AND NASTY |
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11-20-2002, 04:52 PM
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#9 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Apr 2001
Posts: 8,245
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11-20-2002, 04:53 PM
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#10 |
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HAL 9000
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2001
Posts: 34,515
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malaka
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11-20-2002, 04:56 PM
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#11 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Apr 2001
Posts: 8,245
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11-20-2002, 04:56 PM
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2002
Location: StatsRemote.com
Posts: 1,804
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11-20-2002, 04:58 PM
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#13 |
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Shall I remind everyone that there wouldn't be any U.S. of fucking A. if our incredibly smart European ancestors didn't sale overseas and exploit the poor Indians ?
Europe rocks  |
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11-20-2002, 04:58 PM
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#14 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: KAGAWA, Japan
Posts: 470
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Quote:
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sdfsdfsdvgf |
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11-20-2002, 04:58 PM
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Guest
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GB  |
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11-20-2002, 04:59 PM
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#16 |
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HAL 9000
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2001
Posts: 34,515
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"009. if the French invented a cool tank or rocket or whatever, they would name it something so stupid, like Le Boom, that everyone would laugh at it and you couldn?t say it was cool without sounding like a homosexual. "
well that's true........... |
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11-20-2002, 04:59 PM
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#17 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2002
Location: StatsRemote.com
Posts: 1,804
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Three guys, an Englishman, a Frenchman and an American are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, " says the genie. The American says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in America." With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in America was forever made fertile for farming. The Frenchman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around France, so that no one can come into our precious country." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around France. The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall. The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out." The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water."
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11-20-2002, 05:00 PM
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#18 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: In the walls of your house.
Posts: 3,985
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Quote:
That's some people's idea of a good time and something tells me that somebody on this board has a site that caters to that niche.
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"Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats." --H.L. Mencken |
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11-20-2002, 05:02 PM
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LAX Immigration
Posts: 2,940
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11-20-2002, 05:02 PM
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#20 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: us
Posts: 336
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11-20-2002, 05:02 PM
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#21 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2002
Location: StatsRemote.com
Posts: 1,804
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Quote:
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11-20-2002, 05:03 PM
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#22 |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: cloud number 9
Posts: 4,396
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classic post of an average american with a very low IQ...
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SEO Mogul | ICQ: 163671223 |
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11-20-2002, 05:03 PM
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11-20-2002, 05:04 PM
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Quote:
We're all European inside ... some more ... some less. Face it. |
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11-20-2002, 05:07 PM
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#25 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LAX Immigration
Posts: 2,940
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Quote:
Some more stuff found with google: TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING FRENCH 1. When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay. 2. Experience the joy of winning the world cup for the first time. 3. You get to eat insect food like snails and frog's legs. 4. If there's a war you can surrender really early. 5. You don't have to read the subtitles on those late night films on TV. 6. You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people's countries. 7. You can be ugly and still become a famous film star. 8. Allow Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating your sense of national pride. 9. You don't have to bother with toilets, just shit in the street. 10. People think you're a great lover even when you're not. TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN 1. You can have a woman president without electing her. 2. You can spell colour wrong and get away with it. 3. You can call Budweiser beer. 4. You can be a crook and still be president. 5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything. 6. If you can breathe you can get a gun. 7. You get to be really obese. 8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care. 9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy" 10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth. 10a. When you're not. 10b. At all. TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH 1. Two World Wars and One World Cup doo-dah doo-dah. 2. Proper beer. 3. You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket. 4. You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events 5. Union jack underpants. 6. Water shortages guaranteed every single summer. 7. You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power. 8. Bathing once a week-whether you need to or not. 9. Ditto changing underwear 10. Beats being Welsh. 10a. Or Scottish TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN 1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes. 2. Unembarrassed to wear fur. 3. No need to worry about tax returns. 4. Glorious military history prior to 400 a.d. 5. Can wear sunglasses inside. 6. Political stability. 7. Flexible working hours. 8. Live near the Pope. 9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend's armpit hair. 10. Country run by Sicilian murderers TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SPANISH 1. Glorious history of killing South American tribes. 2. The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees. 3. You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, Brits etc. 4. The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans. 5. Everybody else makes crap paella and claims it's the real thing. 6. Honesty 7. Only sure way of bedding a woman is to dress up in stupid, tight clothes and risk your life in front of bulls 8. You get to eat bulls' testicles. 9. Gibraltar. 10. Supported Argentina in Falklands War. TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING INDIAN 1. Chicken Madras 2. Lamb Passanda 3. Onion Bhaji 4. Bombay Potato 5. Chicken Tikka Masala 6. Rogan Josh 7. Popadoms 8. Chicken Dopiaza 9. Meat Boona 10. Kingfisher lager TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING WELSH 1. You've got to be having a laugh, haven't you? TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING IRISH 1. Guinness. 2. 18 children because you can't use contraceptives. 3. You can get into a fight just by marching down someone's road. 4. Pubs never close. 5. Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in the second Vatican Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can't have sex with a condom on. 6. No one can ever remember the night before. 7. Kill people you don't agree with. 8. Stew. 9. More Guinness. 10. Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the morning after a bout of sectarian violence. TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING CANADIAN 1. It beats being an American. 2. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground. 3. You can play hockey 12 months a year, outdoors. 4. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground. 5. Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe? 6. A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise. 7. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground. 8. Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins. 9. Own-an-Eskimo scheme. 10. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground. TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRALIAN 1. Know your great-grand-dad was a murdering bastard that no civilized nation on earth wanted. 2. Victoria Bitter 3. Dispossess Aborigines who have lived in your country for 40,000 years because you think it belongs to you. 4. Cricket captain not afraid to cry live on TV. 5. Tact and sensitivity. 6. Bondi Beach. 7. Other beaches. 8. Liberated attitude to homosexuals. 9. Drinking cold lager on the beach 10. Having a bit of a swim and then drink some cold lager on the beach. |
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11-20-2002, 05:07 PM
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#26 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Germany
Posts: 768
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Why America sucks Ass:
1-20 George W. Bush |
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11-20-2002, 05:08 PM
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#27 | |
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Guest
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Quote:
Truer words have never been spoken. |
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11-20-2002, 05:09 PM
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#28 |
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Over 16 years those German suckers asked me to become German citizen. Hell no, fuck off...
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11-20-2002, 05:10 PM
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#29 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: us
Posts: 336
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11-20-2002, 05:14 PM
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#30 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LAX Immigration
Posts: 2,940
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There was a Frenchman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Provence. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark.
Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Englishman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Frenchman had his hand against his face where he'd been slapped. The Frenchman was thinking: 'The English fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead.' Claudia Schiffer was thinking: 'The French fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it.' And the Englishman was thinking: 'This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make another kissing noise and slap that French bastard again.´ |
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11-20-2002, 05:17 PM
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#31 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2002
Location: StatsRemote.com
Posts: 1,804
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This is really old but still funny...
On a sunny deserted island in the middle of nowhere, the following folks were to be found:- 2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman 2 French men and 1 French woman 2 German men and 1 German woman 2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman 2 English men and 1 English woman 2 Bulgarian men and 1 Bulgarian woman 2 American men and 1 American woman 2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman 2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman ============================================= One month later, the following things had occurred: ============================================= -One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman. -The 2 French men and the French woman are living happily together in a menage-a-trois. -The 2 German men have a strict weekly schedule of alternating visits with the German woman. -The 2 Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them. -The 2 English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman. -The 2 Bulgarian men took a long look at the endless ocean and one look at the Bulgarian woman and they started swimming. -The 2 American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide, because the American woman keeps on bitching about her body, the true nature of feminism, how she can do everything that they can do, the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how sand and palm trees make her look fat, how her LAST boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her much nicer than THEY do, and how her relationship with her mother is improving. But at least the taxes are low and it is not raining. -The 2 Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are waiting for instructions. -The Irish began by dividing the island into North and South and by setting up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it gets sort of foggy after the first few litters of coconut whiskey,but they are satisfied because at least the English aren't getting laid.
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11-20-2002, 05:17 PM
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#32 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,601
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wheres europe?
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11-20-2002, 05:19 PM
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#33 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LAX Immigration
Posts: 2,940
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11-20-2002, 05:22 PM
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#34 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LAX Immigration
Posts: 2,940
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Q:How do you castrate a frenchmen?
A:Kick his sister in the jaw. |
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11-20-2002, 05:23 PM
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#35 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: KAGAWA, Japan
Posts: 470
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Quote:
Thread is hilarious!
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sdfsdfsdvgf |
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11-20-2002, 05:47 PM
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#36 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: here
Posts: 534
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A Canadian couple was strolling through a park in London and sat down on a bench next to an elderly Briton. The Brit noticed their lapel pins sporting the Canadian flag and, to make conversation, said "Judging by your pins, you must be Canadians".
"Indeed we are", replied the Canadian gentleman. "I hope you won't mind my asking," said the Brit, "but what do the two red bars on your flag represent?" "Well," replied the Canadian gentlman, "one of the bars stands for the courage and hardiness of our people in settling the cold expanses and broad prairies of our country. The other is for the honesty and integrity for which Canadians are known." The Brit mulled this over and nodded. Having poor eyesight at his advanced age, and not being familiar with maple leaves, he then asked, "And what's that six-pointed item in the middle of your flag?" "Oh, that's to remind us of the six words of our national motto," the Canadian lady piped up. The Brit asked, "And what are those six words?" The Canadian smiled and replied, "They are 'Don't blame us - we're not Americans.' " Haha..
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 ICQ: 267715714 |
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11-20-2002, 05:53 PM
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#37 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2002
Location: StatsRemote.com
Posts: 1,804
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THE ITALIAN WHO WENT TO ENGLAND
One day ima gonna England to bigga hotel. Ina Morning I go down to eat breakfast. I tella waitress I wanna two pissis toast. She brings me only one piss. I tella her I want two piss. She say go to the toilet. I say you no understand. I wanna to piss onna my plate. She say you better not piss onna plate, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch. Later I go to eat at the bigga restaurant. The waitress brings me a spoon and knife but no fock. I tella her I wanna fock. She tell me everyone wanna fock. I tell her you no understand. I wanna fock on the table. She say you better not fock on the table, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch. So I go back to my room inna hotel and there is no shits onna my bed. Call the manager and tella him I wanna shit. He tell me to go to toilet. I say you no understand. I wanna shit on my bed. He say you better not shit onna bed, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the man and he call me sonna ma bitch. I go to the checkout and the man at the desk say: "Peace on you". I say piss on you too, you sonna ma bitch, I gonna back to Italy.
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11-20-2002, 05:59 PM
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#38 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Seattle
Posts: 1,467
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11-20-2002, 06:11 PM
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#39 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: here
Posts: 534
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no, they dream about the hole behind the Bush...
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ICQ: 267715714 |
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11-20-2002, 06:12 PM
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Not making A Comeback
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Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 10,218
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11-20-2002, 06:13 PM
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#41 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 6,372
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20. The women in Sweden are not really Swedish anymore, this whole country has been genetically polluted by arabs. We have cut our own throats.
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11-20-2002, 06:17 PM
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#42 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: here
Posts: 534
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KingK7 - Svensk?
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ICQ: 267715714 |
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11-20-2002, 06:24 PM
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#43 | |
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Confirmed User
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Utopia
Posts: 6,482
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11-20-2002, 06:44 PM
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#44 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: uranus
Posts: 219
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Quote:
Damn im proud to be Euro/Canadian !
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<a href="http://www.HotBuXXX.com" target="_blank"> <b>Make Money !$!$!</B></a> <a href="http://www.HotCamera.com" target="_blank">54 Feeds for how much ???</a> |
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11-20-2002, 06:47 PM
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#45 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: too much in front of my monitor...
Posts: 367
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Quote:
1. George Bush 2. republicans 3. soap operas 4. bloody feet, inches & gallons [to make it easier a US gallon isn't the same as a GB gallon] At least you can built something fairly precise when measuring in millimeters. 5. really tasteless cheese and aweful bread (fairy floss) 6. no social security system to speak of 7. ethnic violence and hatred 8. George W. Bush 9. what's that black woman's name next to him? 10. playing 'football' with their hands 11. home of all Disney kitsch 12. hardly any public transport worth using 13. almost all politicians worldwide come to suck George Bush's ass 14. John Howard (prime minister of Australia) crawled up George Bush's ass and made a real butt plug of himself! 15. obsession with plastic surgery 16. only junk food - lack of decent food (unless you're prepared to pay half your weekly earnings for one meal) 17. Americans smoke too - they just don't inhale... 18. simply evil 19. the women in USA never dare to go nude in public - go find me a decent nude beach outside California 20. Americans always think their view of the world is right, and if you oppose this they come and invade your country (proven by history)
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Spam me with design ideas for my signature - LOL! |
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11-20-2002, 06:51 PM
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#46 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LAX Immigration
Posts: 2,940
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11-20-2002, 06:58 PM
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#47 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2002
Location: StatsRemote.com
Posts: 1,804
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11-21-2002, 04:02 AM
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#48 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: too much in front of my monitor...
Posts: 367
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Quote:
Now, what's that in this weird english you're talking? Yard? I better turn my windscreen wipers on or might not see your until your face hits my bonnet, and then I'll have to dig your grave in my yard...
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Spam me with design ideas for my signature - LOL! |
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11-21-2002, 04:16 AM
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#49 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: hell
Posts: 182
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One god thing about beeing European is that our planes tend to stay in the air..More than you can say about American Airlines
L-M
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The secret of greatness is simple: do better work than any other man in your field - and keep on doing it. 
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11-21-2002, 04:33 AM
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#50 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: London
Posts: 189
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According to the newspapers here in jolly old England none of you fucking Americans even know where Europe is...
Also I would just like to tell you all that unless you have used British trains, it will remain incomprehensible to you quite how utterly shit they are - particularly South West Trains, who this morning left me standing on a fucking squalid platform in the pissing fucking rain for forty fucking minutes this morning. |
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