Headlines from the year 2029

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  • MichaelP
    Registered User
    • Aug 2003
    • 7123

    #1

    Headlines from the year 2029

    Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California

    White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

    Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

    Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

    Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

    Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

    France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica . No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

    Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

    George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

    Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

    85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise are the keys to weight loss.

    Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

    Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.

    Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States

    Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.

    Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

    Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

    Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

    New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030.

    IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

    Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines. And this just in, Brett Favre still undecided as to what nursing home he wants to reside in.

    Now, send this to whomever you want and as many as you want, then, guess what.... NOTHING will happen. No miracles, no money, absolutely nothing...

    Except you might make someone smile or become very, very scared
    Last edited by MichaelP; 06-03-2009, 11:35 AM.
  • Bryan G
    Confirmed User
    • Aug 2005
    • 8338

    #2
    hahaha nice!
    Bryan
    skype: bryan.glass3 | ICQ 302999591

    Comment

    • mikeyddddd
      Viva la vulva!
      • Mar 2003
      • 16557

      #3



      Comment

      • pornguy
        Too lazy to set a custom title
        • Mar 2003
        • 62910

        #4
        Thats a good one.
        PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic

        AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online!
        TChicks.com | Angeles Cid | Mariana Cordoba | MAILERS WELCOME!

        Comment

        • WebairGerard
          Confirmed User
          • Sep 2005
          • 8113

          #5
          Originally posted by mikeyddddd



          amazing mikey!

          Comment

          • Yen_HerbalRevenue
            Confirmed User
            • Mar 2009
            • 816

            #6
            he he I can see it all....


            ICQ: 568663106 AIM: YenHerbalRevenue

            Comment

            • gmr324
              Confirmed User
              • Aug 2006
              • 1199

              #7
              Great one...love the Mexifornia comment

              Comment

              • SilentKnight
                Megan Fox's fluffer
                • Oct 2005
                • 24812

                #8

                Comment

                • voa
                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                  • Nov 2006
                  • 16532

                  #9
                  Hah this is old but still funny

                  Comment

                  • OrangeContent
                    Confirmed User
                    • Mar 2009
                    • 381

                    #10
                    Originally posted by SilentKnight
                    SPACEBALLS... there goes the planet. (now I'm not sure it might actually be from another movie, but spaceballs is damn funny!)

                    Edit, planet of the apes?
                    Last edited by OrangeContent; 06-03-2009, 06:24 PM.
                    START A REVIEW SITE GOOD PRICES ON WRITTEN REVIEWS CLICK HERE
                    quote (at) orangecontent.com | ICQ: 564-113-756

                    Comment

                    • OrangeContent
                      Confirmed User
                      • Mar 2009
                      • 381

                      #11
                      START A REVIEW SITE GOOD PRICES ON WRITTEN REVIEWS CLICK HERE
                      quote (at) orangecontent.com | ICQ: 564-113-756

                      Comment

                      • Rochard
                        Jägermeister Test Pilot
                        • Dec 2001
                        • 75770

                        #12
                        Originally posted by MichaelP
                        O
                        France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica . No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!
                        That's fucking classic!
                        Herschel Savage
                        Brooklyn, NY

                        Comment

                        • Iron Fist
                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                          • Dec 2006
                          • 23400

                          #13
                          lolercopters
                          i like waffles

                          Comment

                          • Drake
                            Hello world!
                            • Mar 2003
                            • 12508

                            #14
                            Some gems in there

                            Comment

                            • Cyandin
                              Confirmed User
                              • Aug 2008
                              • 1723

                              #15
                              roflcopter

                              Comment

                              • Mr.Right - Banned For Life
                                I guarantee it
                                • May 2005
                                • 18314

                                #16
                                LMAO!

                                Comment

                                • Neon Dollars Daniel
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Aug 2008
                                  • 243

                                  #17
                                  This might not be considered a joke in the 2020s
                                  www.NeonDollars.com
                                  Awesome co-branded White Label sites! Click here for details!
                                  ICQ: 419 554 034 or EMAIL: daniel[@]neondollars[.]com

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