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-   -   Airport security is such a friggen joke sometimes... (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=818767)

k0nr4d 03-31-2008 04:08 PM
lol, im glad europe isn't htis bad. When i was coming back from greece the guy looked at the wrong end of my passport, then told me go ahead.

NETbilling 03-31-2008 04:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LAJ (Post 14001564)
So I'm at the Phoenix airport yesterday on my way home after an AWESOME forum and I'm going thru "security". Whenever possible I always ONLY do carry on. I pull my toiletry bag out of my suitcase and put it on the belt. Gotta make sure my deadly mix of hairgel, deodorant, toothpaste, cologne and shaving cream all fit into a 1-quart baggie, therefore making it physically impossible for me to get to it in-flight. Then I get a lecture from the woman about how I should pull the baggie OUT of the toiletry bag to save everyone time.

"umm... Ma'am... I can appreciate the rules you guys have going on here, but if time is important here, your lecture took a lot longer than the physical act of unzipping the bag and looking at the contents"

So then she asks me if I packed a snow globe in my suitcase to which my reply was "yes... I do this every time I travel home. I buy my son a snow globe from each of the cities I travel to all year long."

Bag check time. No telling what kind of threat I pose NOW.

So the guy rifles thru my very meticulously packed suitcase... which for me is like getting teeth pulled.

"sir... are you looking for anything other than my dangerous snow globe?"

"no... where is it?"

"that black plastic bag right in front with the paper wrapped around it to look like a present."

So of course he unwraps and pulls it out and says I can't take it with me cuz it's more than 3 ounces. NOT because I could have injected it with something... but simply cuz it's more than 3 ounces.

Well that's logical.

My options? Either go all the way back to check in and get my bag checked in... or go to the post office in the airport and mail it.

"all this for a $15 gift for my 4 year old son?... throw the god damned thing away" I told him.

Then I walked 20 feet to the gift store, saw the same exact snowglobe there, bought it, and put it in my suitcase.

Nice.

Upon my return to Austin I see an 80 year old man getting frisked right there in front of everyone COPS style.

"Are you friggen KIDDING ME?"... I shouted out to the guys... "SHAME ON YOU."

I'm probably on everyone's watch list now...
It was great seeing you Jay... lighten up dude

SleazyDream 03-31-2008 04:18 PM
i had no problems this time, but have had many in the past. i guess after they've anal probed you a dozen times and found nothing they give up

LAJ 03-31-2008 04:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by NetBilling (Post 14003556)
It was great seeing you Jay... lighten up dude

LOL!

And great seeing you too Mitch.

See you in San Fran!

NETbilling 03-31-2008 04:30 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by NetBilling (Post 14003556)
It was great seeing you Jay... lighten up dude
Just kidding man. It does suck sometimes but it certainly is better than the alternative.

munki 03-31-2008 04:39 PM
I went through a full security stop leaving Phoenix... fucking ridiculous...

TSA guys explain to me when pulling me out of line that it's standard procedure... to which I respond I just watched you guys let at least 100 people go ahead of me, and at least 50 after me with out pulling anyone... I don't buy standard procedure.

Long story short... They quite literally swabbed every fucking key on my laptop, every inch of my carry-on, and anything else they could find to swab and test after asking me questions for 30 minutes. Very very very annoying. Have you ever seen anyone take a stack of 100 business cards before and swab and test each one individually? Tedious to say the least.

Imortyl Pussycat 03-31-2008 04:40 PM
the worst is when you get your bag searched and they pull out your sex toys and wave them around for everyone to see. that has happened to every female i know at one time or another. i think they do it on purpose after scanning the bags. if it looks like a dildo is in the bag, they want to investigate and then go wack-off in the bathroom after. i wanted to die when it happened to me and never traveled with toys again.

Good seeing you at the show Jay!

F-U-Jimmy 03-31-2008 05:11 PM
There is a bigger issue here than the obvious frustration that well all feel. That of serious organized theft rings operating at LAX and other airports.
Since the 911 crackdown baggage handlers know that a lot more valuable stuff is placed in checked bags and by valuable I dont just mean laptops or cameras. Women's clothing, sports shoes and expensive makeup are being systematically removed from passenger and flight crews checked bags.

Now you might say people are stupid to check cameras and laptops but on the small LAX to San Diego, American Eagle flights there is hardly room for a toothbrush let alone a Canon 5D with a huge lens in the cabin. So there is sometimes no choice but to valet the bags when you walk to your flight. Its these valet bags that are getting ripped off and in huge numbers, its so bad that the Airlines dont want you to know about this new trend.

Then when you find stuff missing try to claim for it and see what happens :321GFY

TroubleTonya 03-31-2008 05:25 PM
Dumb Dumb Dumb.....
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by LAJ (Post 14001564)
So I'm at the Phoenix airport yesterday on my way home after an AWESOME forum and I'm going thru "security". Whenever possible I always ONLY do carry on. I pull my toiletry bag out of my suitcase and put it on the belt. Gotta make sure my deadly mix of hairgel, deodorant, toothpaste, cologne and shaving cream all fit into a 1-quart baggie, therefore making it physically impossible for me to get to it in-flight. Then I get a lecture from the woman about how I should pull the baggie OUT of the toiletry bag to save everyone time.

"umm... Ma'am... I can appreciate the rules you guys have going on here, but if time is important here, your lecture took a lot longer than the physical act of unzipping the bag and looking at the contents"

So then she asks me if I packed a snow globe in my suitcase to which my reply was "yes... I do this every time I travel home. I buy my son a snow globe from each of the cities I travel to all year long."

Bag check time. No telling what kind of threat I pose NOW.

So the guy rifles thru my very meticulously packed suitcase... which for me is like getting teeth pulled.

"sir... are you looking for anything other than my dangerous snow globe?"

"no... where is it?"

"that black plastic bag right in front with the paper wrapped around it to look like a present."

So of course he unwraps and pulls it out and says I can't take it with me cuz it's more than 3 ounces. NOT because I could have injected it with something... but simply cuz it's more than 3 ounces.

Well that's logical.

My options? Either go all the way back to check in and get my bag checked in... or go to the post office in the airport and mail it.

"all this for a $15 gift for my 4 year old son?... throw the god damned thing away" I told him.

Then I walked 20 feet to the gift store, saw the same exact snowglobe there, bought it, and put it in my suitcase.

Nice.

Upon my return to Austin I see an 80 year old man getting frisked right there in front of everyone COPS style.

"Are you friggen KIDDING ME?"... I shouted out to the guys... "SHAME ON YOU."

I'm probably on everyone's watch list now...
OH JAY! You'll never NOT be harassed again after that.

When I was coming back from FL last year I had bought an ocean globe to bring home as a gift. This was in my carry on as I didn't want it slammed around and broken like so many things when you send your bags into the abyss. I had absolutely NO issues in the FL airport what so ever. Me and my ocean globe got on the plane w/o issue.

I had a layover in Dallas and met my sister for dinner there for having to go back through security. NOW there's a big fucking issue with my globe. I looked at the TSA and I said... "now you know I flew from Florida to here with that in my backpack right?" He looked at me and said, "well you'll have to check it this time maam." I was like, your fucking kidding me right? Next thing you know they are escorting me back to the front desk of the airline to check my fucking globe. When I get there I'm treated like shit by the bitch at the front desk and told I've already checked 2 bags so I'm going to have to pay extra for this item to be put on the plane.

The fucked up thing is that there was 4 of us leaving FL at the same time and they checked someone else's bag to me so he never got his bag when he arrived in TUCSON, some 5 hours earlier. This woman at the counter continues to argue with me about my bags. I told her look, *by now I'm really angry and prolly have the I'm going to kill you soon look on my face* I can tell you who I checked in with at the FL airport and who's bag I have mysteriously checked to me. FINALLY this bitch agrees to get me a box for my fucking globe and check it for free.

I could not believe the way we were treated by the airlines because of their own fuck up. IF the dumbasses in FL knew how to check bags, we would have all had our own ticket stubs, AND if they had just made me check it in FL this would have never happened. :321GFY FL baggage checkers!! I hate to fly anymore!


/end rant

TheAmericanCannibal 03-31-2008 05:37 PM
I have stories for days but I am still trying to catch my breath from my OJ Simpson like run through Sky Harbor yesterday morning.

A line of 300 passengers waiting for one skycap at Southwest made me almost miss myflight-
If it weren't for sprinting, cutting in line in front of Media and the GGW crew ( who were on my same plane I later found out hahaha) and Earth Wind and Fire's Mgr. ( hot chick)
I was reeling.

After going to bed pretty late and waking up to be at the airport an hour before my flight I was almost fucked!

That security line sucked ass- but they let me fly through this time because I was panting..

Fuck Flying I wanna buy an RV

LAJ 03-31-2008 06:40 PM
Man these are some fucked up stories...

LAJ 03-31-2008 06:42 PM
Oh... And the theft thing does seem like it's getting out of hand.

tony286 03-31-2008 06:50 PM
thats such crap.

F-U-Jimmy 03-31-2008 07:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LAJ (Post 14004254)
Oh... And the theft thing does seem like it's getting out of hand.
Jay it is, here's a clip from USA Today 03-31-08


"Baggage handlers arrested in Tampa"
"Three baggage handlers at Tampa Int Airport have been arrested for dealing in stolen property, according to arrest reports from Hillsborough County Sheriffs Office.

Efrain Malave-Bermudez, 34, Ernie Azucey, 23 and Juan Ayenda-Nieves52, were employed by a company hired by Continental Airlines, according to the arrest reports. The trio, arrested friday, are accused of dealing electronic goods that included laptop computers, digital cameras and iPods that were stolen form passengers luggage".

shermo 03-31-2008 07:37 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by F-U-Jimmy (Post 14004393)
Jay it is, here's a clip from USA Today 03-31-08


"Baggage handlers arrested in Tampa"
"Three baggage handlers at Tampa Int Airport have been arrested for dealing in stolen property, according to arrest reports from Hillsborough County Sheriffs Office.

Efrain Malave-Bermudez, 34, Ernie Azucey, 23 and Juan Ayenda-Nieves52, were employed by a company hired by Continental Airlines, according to the arrest reports. The trio, arrested friday, are accused of dealing electronic goods that included laptop computers, digital cameras and iPods that were stolen form passengers luggage".
I bet my Ipod was somewhere in that mix. :mad:

OG LennyT 03-31-2008 07:46 PM
I fly a lot, follow the guidelines on tsa.gov, and never have a problem....

something to be said for being "your own worse enemy"

wargames 03-31-2008 07:49 PM
I hate flying these days :(

LAJ 03-31-2008 08:43 PM
Well I'm convinced now that carry on is really the only way to go. I've almost always done it that way anyway... but I guess I'd rather deal with some moron paid to do their job rather than some moron paid to sell my stuff.

F-U-Jimmy 04-01-2008 03:44 PM
More news about theft at airports, this is going to be big news soon.

Phoenix police investigating airport thefts
Last Edited: Monday, 31 Mar 2008, 2:44 PM MST
Created: Monday, 31 Mar 2008, 2:24 PM MST

-

PHOENIX -- Phoenix police are investigating complaints of someone snatching items out of luggage at Sky Harbor International Airport.
Police say the complaints came from passengers whose luggage was either loaded or unloaded out of the airport's Terminal 3.

No arrests have been made.

Police say they've contacted the Transportation Security Administration and interviewed several members of a contract company working at Sky Harbor.

Police Detective Reuben Gonzales said Monday that investigators have confirmed that some items were indeed stolen out of luggage and later recovered.

Peaches 04-01-2008 03:57 PM
Do what Kathi what National Net does (and what I keep telling myself to do) - she gets those plastic things that you use to keep your cables together and/or the police use as handcuffs and "locks" her luggage. Most of the time they are left intact - I guess it's easier to find one that's not locked up than to cut one of those things open then find a way to dispose of it.

Anyhoo - if it does make it through unscathed, she just asked the hotel front desk for scissors and cuts them off.

Not fool proof but at least it's something and you don't have to deal with TSA breaking your locks.

MattO 04-01-2008 04:01 PM
I hate checking in baggage, I just take a carry-on and if I need more shit where I'm going I'll hit a store.

Missy 04-01-2008 04:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peaches (Post 14010791)
Do what Kathi what National Net does (and what I keep telling myself to do) - she gets those plastic things that you use to keep your cables together and/or the police use as handcuffs and "locks" her luggage. Most of the time they are left intact - I guess it's easier to find one that's not locked up than to cut one of those things open then find a way to dispose of it.

Anyhoo - if it does make it through unscathed, she just asked the hotel front desk for scissors and cuts them off.

Not fool proof but at least it's something and you don't have to deal with TSA breaking your locks.
I thought we weren't allowed to lock up our luggage by any method? I'm curious about this because it sounds like a good method if it actually works. That's my biggest bitch about the new airport security regulations... not being able to put a lock on my luggage and being forced to entrust my personal belongings to complete strangers.

Peaches 04-01-2008 04:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Missy (Post 14010945)
I thought we weren't allowed to lock up our luggage by any method? I'm curious about this because it sounds like a good method if it actually works. That's my biggest bitch about the new airport security regulations... not being able to put a lock on my luggage and being forced to entrust my personal belongings to complete strangers.
1. They do have "TSA locks" which can be opened by TSA employees but supposedly not by baggage handlers and 2. if they don't like the zip locks, all they do is cut them off and you're right back where you started from if you hadn't put them on in the first place :) They're not going to arrest you or anything for having them on there.

Missy 04-01-2008 04:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peaches (Post 14010970)
1. They do have "TSA locks" which can be opened by TSA employees but supposedly not by baggage handlers and 2. if they don't like the zip locks, all they do is cut them off and you're right back where you started from if you hadn't put them on in the first place :) They're not going to arrest you or anything for having them on there.
I was never aware of that before. Thanks for the tip :thumbsup

LAJ 04-01-2008 05:42 PM
How timely!

Airport bag theft at Phoenix Sky Harbor...

http://www.myfoxphoenix.com/myfox/pa...Y&pageId=1.1.1

Odin 04-01-2008 06:48 PM
Airport security is a joke in general, obviously anyone who wanted to get enough liquid explosive on a flight could do it in a number of ways. Claim it is for a baby (though a baby has to be present), claim it is contact lens solution or just have multiple guys bring in the maximum amount of liquids each and mix it on board. Not fucking rocket science lol. But yeah, as stupid as it is there is no point getting worked up over it, just accept you can't really take that shit on the plane in the first place, stop crying and move on.

OG LennyT 04-01-2008 06:50 PM
The baggage theft thing in Florida had nothing to do with TSA, they were contractors from the airline.

xmas13 04-01-2008 07:18 PM
I hate thieves, luggage lost, and flights canceled/delayed, missed.

Security/customs folks are so fucking annoying. Keep your calm under any circumstance, if they feel too much hostility, they might decide they want to fuck you over a detail.

born4porn 04-01-2008 07:22 PM
they are fucking power trippers!!

xmas13 04-01-2008 07:25 PM
http://a.abcnews.com/images/US/ap_taser_070823_ms.jpg


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