First it was dollars to euros, whats next Euro English, huh? - GoFuckYourself.com

Dvae · 11-24-2007, 06:27 AM

With the implementation of the Eurodollar underway in Europe these last few years, the European Union is trying to find new ways to standardize practices in Europe.

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility.

Conversion to European English
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

Conversion to European English
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

Conversion to European English
By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!

After Shock Media · 11-24-2007, 06:29 AM

I hope this is a joke and its funny and cleaver if it is. Yet knowing governments and all I honestly am not sure if I should laugh or cry.

polish_aristocrat · 11-24-2007, 06:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dvae

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!

Emil · 11-24-2007, 06:33 AM

me kat dont eat food

Dvae · 11-24-2007, 06:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emil

me kat dont eat food

Its already catching on.

The link in your sig...
WordZe-Ze King of Keywords

.

hjnet · 11-24-2007, 07:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dvae

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!

Some areas in the US are already 6 years ahead of us Europeans...

Doctor Dre · 11-24-2007, 07:31 AM

Oldie but a goodie

Big_D · 11-24-2007, 08:05 AM

Ironically this is the shirt I am wearing right now. Had it made a few months back.

Klen · 11-24-2007, 08:26 AM

I belive Bush already uses such type of writing when he need to talk.Not just him,mayor of Zagreb also used it.

GreyWolf · 11-24-2007, 08:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dvae

First it was dollars to euros, whats next Euro English, huh?

Zis vood not be a zuprize

The EU parliament, thanks to bureaucratic idiocy, managed to produce pages of legislation on "how to make a sandwich" along with other culinary delights. The aim was hygeine standards in food preparation, however any chef would need a law degree and have to go an average of three sets of court appeals/hearings before his food could be delivered to a restaurant table.

If anyone paid attention to this rubbish, people in Europe were going to be suffering from malnutrition

nAtuRaLbEautY · 11-24-2007, 08:46 AM

looks so confusing.. how come they think stuff like that, instead of doing something for more important issues.

11-24-2007, 06:27 AM	#1
Dvae Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: US Posts: 5,326	First it was dollars to euros, whats next Euro English, huh? With the implementation of the Eurodollar underway in Europe these last few years, the European Union is trying to find new ways to standardize practices in Europe. The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility. Conversion to European English As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter. Conversion to European English There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter. In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away. Conversion to European English By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!

11-24-2007, 06:29 AM	#2
After Shock Media It's coming look busy Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn". Posts: 35,299	I hope this is a joke and its funny and cleaver if it is. Yet knowing governments and all I honestly am not sure if I should laugh or cry. __________________ [email protected] ICQ:135982156 AIM: Aftershockmed1a MSN: [email protected]

11-24-2007, 06:33 AM	#4
Emil Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Sweden Posts: 5,650	me kat dont eat food __________________ Free 🅑🅘🅣🅒🅞🅘🅝🅢 Every Hour (Yes, really. Free ₿itCoins.) (Signup with ONLY your Email and Password. You can also refer people and get even more.)

11-24-2007, 08:46 AM	#11
nAtuRaLbEautY Confirmed User Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 6,107	looks so confusing.. how come they think stuff like that, instead of doing something for more important issues. __________________ Prime Outsourcing│offshore solutions│manual labor│staff leasing│full time employees starting at $695.00/month=managed and dedicated \| icq: 309570461 \| live chat

11-24-2007, 08:05 AM	#8
Big_D CRAZY MOFUKKA Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 3,296	Ironically this is the shirt I am wearing right now. Had it made a few months back.

11-24-2007, 08:26 AM	#9
Klen Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Little Vienna Posts: 32,235	I belive Bush already uses such type of writing when he need to talk.Not just him,mayor of Zagreb also used it.