This is funny - GoFuckYourself.com

Vendzilla · 11-09-2007, 11:59 AM

A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for your
organization. Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant
and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his
shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our
water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket.
Then I looked around saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, 'Why the spoon?'
'Well, he explained, 'The restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to
revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded
that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a
drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our
personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to
the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.' As luck would have it, I
dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare. 'I'll get
another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra
trip to get it right now.' I was impressed. I also noticed that there
was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking round, I noticed
that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So
before he walked off, I asked the waiter 'Excuse me, but can you tell me
why you have that string right there?' 'Oh, certainly!' Then he lowered
his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned
also found out that we can save time in the restroom by tying this string
to the tip of our 'you know what'. That way, we can pull it out without
touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time
spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent.' I asked, 'After you get it out,
how do you put it back?' 'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the
others, but I use the spoon.

_Richard_ · 11-09-2007, 12:07 PM

hahahaha totally worth the wait

StuBradley · 11-09-2007, 01:00 PM

An oldie but a goodie.

Shagbunny · 11-09-2007, 01:03 PM

hahaha that's funny

martinsc · 11-09-2007, 01:04 PM

Violetta · 11-09-2007, 01:06 PM

hehehe

96ukssob · 11-09-2007, 01:07 PM

nice nice

sicone · 11-09-2007, 01:08 PM

ACMoviePass -Dave Dunit- · 11-09-2007, 01:10 PM

11-09-2007, 11:59 AM	#1
Vendzilla Biker Gnome Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: cell#324 Posts: 23,200	This is funny A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for your organization. Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, 'Why the spoon?' 'Well, he explained, 'The restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.' As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.' I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking round, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the waiter 'Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?' 'Oh, certainly!' Then he lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom by tying this string to the tip of our 'you know what'. That way, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent.' I asked, 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?' 'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon. __________________ Webair died? Carbon is not the problem, it makes up 0.041% of our atmosphere , 95% of that is from Volcanos and decomposing plants and stuff. So people in the US are responsible for 13% of the carbon in the atmosphere which 95% is not from Humans, like cars and trucks and stuff and they want to spend trillions to fix it while Solar Panel plants are powered by coal plants think about that

11-09-2007, 01:00 PM	#3
StuBradley Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 2,625	An oldie but a goodie. __________________ 51-566-514

11-09-2007, 01:04 PM	#5
martinsc Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 Posts: 27,047	__________________ Make Money

11-09-2007, 01:06 PM	#6
Violetta Affiliate Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 28,735	hehehe __________________ M&A Queen

11-09-2007, 01:07 PM	#7
96ukssob So Fucking Banananananas Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: If I was in your ass you'd know it Posts: 12,991	nice nice __________________ Email: Clicky on Me

11-09-2007, 12:07 PM	#2
_Richard_ Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Earth Posts: 30,989	hahahaha totally worth the wait

11-09-2007, 01:03 PM	#4
Shagbunny Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: wut Posts: 3,028	hahaha that's funny

11-09-2007, 01:08 PM	#8
sicone Retired Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Sac Posts: 18,453	__________________

11-09-2007, 01:10 PM	#9
ACMoviePass -Dave Dunit- Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: In Your Mouth Posts: 296	__________________ ICQ: 398-996-991 Email: dave "at" acmoviepass.com 80% PAYOUTS EVERY FRIDAY IN NOVEMBER!!!