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|  09-12-2007, 01:23 PM | #1 | 
| Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Brasil 
					Posts: 15,778
				 |  Economic Models SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour. COMMUNISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk. FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk. NAZISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you. BUREAUCRATISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away... TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. SURREALISM You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons AN AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow hasropped dead. ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull. THE ANDERSEN MODEL You have two cows. You shred them. A FRENCH CORPORATION You have two cows. You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows. A JAPANESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide. A GERMAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. AN ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch. A RUSSIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. A SWISS CORPORATION You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them. A CHINESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation. AN INDIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You worship them. A BRITISH CORPORATION You have two cows. Both are mad. A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive. AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate. AN IRAQI CORPORATION Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No-one believes you, so they bomb the **** out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy.... 
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|  09-12-2007, 06:59 PM | #2 | 
| So Fucking Banned Industry Role:  Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: N.Y. -Long Island -- 
					Posts: 122,992
				 |    el bumpppp | 
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|  09-12-2007, 07:02 PM | #3 | 
| Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: In Your Brain 
					Posts: 3,983
				 |   That was some good stuff 
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|  09-12-2007, 07:07 PM | #4 | 
| Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2006 
					Posts: 23,400
				 | And to think I was expecting cheap pics... silly me. 
				__________________ i like waffles | 
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|  09-12-2007, 07:38 PM | #5 | 
| Now choke yourself! Industry Role:  Join Date: Apr 2006 
					Posts: 12,085
				 | How many times a day are you going to post this? 
				__________________ | 
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|  09-12-2007, 09:46 PM | #6 | 
| Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: 4REALCASH.COM 
					Posts: 783
				 | awesome!! | 
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|  09-12-2007, 11:27 PM | #7 | 
| Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 
					Posts: 4,357
				 | Too many words to read. 
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|  09-12-2007, 11:34 PM | #8 | 
| It's coming look busy Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn". 
					Posts: 35,299
				 | Im sorry the Japanese is fucking great. 
				__________________ | 
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|  09-12-2007, 11:42 PM | #9 | 
| So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: 253-233-241 
					Posts: 6,518
				 | Long read, but very enjoyable :D | 
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|  09-13-2007, 12:00 AM | #10 | 
| Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role:  Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 
					Posts: 27,047
				 |  
				__________________ Make Money | 
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|  09-13-2007, 12:09 AM | #11 | 
| Registered User Join Date: Sep 2007 
					Posts: 14
				 | very funny :P | 
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|  09-13-2007, 12:16 AM | #12 | 
| sex dwarf Join Date: May 2002 
					Posts: 17,860
				 | I vote for surrealism   
				__________________ /(bb|[^b]{2})/ | 
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|  09-13-2007, 01:09 AM | #13 | 
| Confirmed User Industry Role:  Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Porn Valley 
					Posts: 8,151
				 | HAHA.. thats pretty good.. 
				__________________ | 
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|  09-13-2007, 01:37 AM | #14 | 
| Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NorCal 
					Posts: 2,375
				 | quite some truth, unfortunately | 
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