Alabama Sex Toy Law - No Vibrators Allowed

[M0nk]

In Alabama, guns are sold everywhere, but sex toys are banned. Now the state law banning the sale of vibrators may go before the U.S. Supreme Court. The case will garner a lot of attention.


In Alabama, you can sell guns on any street corner but you can't sell sex toys.
That's right. Alabama is a vibrator-free state!

Well, technically you can go across state lines and buy sex toys in Georgia and Tennessee and carry them home. But the Alabama Legislature, in its infinite wisdom and in the spirit of protecting citizens from moral turpitude, a while back banned the sale of sex toys (or "marital aids" as some lawmakers coyly call them).

Today, the U.S. Supreme Court has shown a gleam of interest in this controversial state law, which has been challenged in Alabama courts by adult toy retailer Sherri Williams. She has been fighting the law for nearly 10 years.

Williams has been in district court three times on this issue and has won twice. But both times her victories were struck down by the U.S. 11th Circuit Court of Appeals. She filed a petition to the Supremes and has hired well-known First Amendment rights attorney Paul Cambria. Also joining in the appeal petition with Williams are the Free Speech Coalition and the First Amendment Lawyers Association.

(At the very least, this case seems to be a restraint-of-trade case as much as anything else, since the devices are sold in all the neighboring states. You'd think she would win on that, alone.)

Anyway, the Supremes have informed the state of Alabama that it must file an answering brief with the High Court, which is an indication that the case might be taken up in the next session. If so, I would like to be a fly on the wall when oral arguments are heard.

SCALLIA: You say that the sale of the Twizzler-Twister should be banned?
ALABAMA GUY: Yes,Your Honor.
ALITO: And the Buzzer-Master?
ALABAMA GUY: Yes, that too.
THOMAS: What about the coke can with the fake pubic hair?
ALABAMA GUY: That one doesn't vibrate, so that one's okay.
THOMAS: Whew! Thank goodness.

But seriously folks, I am hoping that y'all have stopped snickering at the Victorian attitudes of our fine Alabama lawmakers because I want to talk for a minute about sexual attitudes in the Land O' Cotton.

There is, and always has been, a strong strain of paternalism among lawmakers down here. And that paternalistic attitude makes them believe that they are the keepers of the Moral Keys. Us wee folk need protecting from sexual pleasures derived from plastic thingies made in China.

The same lawmakers also have protected Alabamians from the glittering vice dens called casinos, the dangerous Mega-Ball lotteries and betting parlors. All for our own good.

They do, however, let us have SOME fun. We have fireworks stores at every interstate exit. We can buy all manner of guns easily and openly as long as we are of legal age. And we can shoot off the aforementioned fireworks and guns pretty much wherever and whenever we want.

In other words we are free to blow ourselves up at will.
We just can't blow up a dolly with big red lips and openings in her lifelike vinyl self.

[applebee]

Hopefully the High Court decides to hear this matter and strike down the ridiculous puritanical law.

[GreyWolf]

Originally Posted by M0nk

SCALLIA: You say that the sale of the Twizzler-Twister should be banned?
ALABAMA GUY: Yes,Your Honor.
ALITO: And the Buzzer-Master?
ALABAMA GUY: Yes, that too.
THOMAS: What about the coke can with the fake pubic hair?
ALABAMA GUY: That one doesn't vibrate, so that one's okay.
THOMAS: Whew! Thank goodness.

Depsite the southern state type bullshit, hypocrisy, adopted "rightousness" and crass redneck conduct - I kinda like the place

It's an excellent backdrop for novels/movies with totally corrupt, but colorful characters, oozing hate in all it's forms (racial and otherwise), bible-thumping trash and conmen. In the middle of this melting pot there are nice folks who actually keep vermin in power in local government. What supposed to be LE, has it's barrel of totally unfit human species incapable of compehending law, nevermind enforcing it - eg the local Sheriff who thieves out of the Christmas gift donation fund etc. And.... not forgetting the upstanding members of the community - otherwise known as the Good Ol Boys

It's so damned rich in background material and enough for 100 books or movies

[M0nk]

[DaddyHalbucks]

That's what you get in the bible belt.

[milkit]

does that include toys sold as "novelties"?

here in tx, sex toys are also not allowed to be sold.

However, theres shops everywhere that sell porn/toys. The only thing is, every single vibe/toy has a stick on it that says "for novelty use only."

same toys as any other shop, just with that sticker. I wonder is alabama is like that too, or totally banned?

[MikesTraffic]

ummm, I'm pretty sure this is bullshit since I live in alabama and here in this city alone we have 4 sex shops that sell porn, toys of all sorts, dildos vibrators etc....

[Vick!]

fucked up country, fucked up laws.

[CuriousToyBoy]

To get beyond the scope of all reason you need politicians involved at the highest level.

2c

[HomerSimpson]

I predict increase in cucumber sales there

[AlienQ - BANNED FOR LIFE]

Whats Moral Perpitude?

[Pleasurepays]

imagine that. a country where people choose the laws of their own community according to how they want to live.

sounds terrible. where is Chairman Mao when we need him?

[dirtysouth]

Welcome to the Dirty Dirty!

[tiger]

Amazing how different some states are.

[who]

It is just so ridiculous. Who is this law protecting???

[Scott McD]

Stupid laws.

What a waste of court time and money...

[tASSy]

if sherri williams has been fighting this "law" for the last 10 years, why is it only garnering attention now? /me confused.

[Miss Munki]

Teh Gheyness

[frostyimpressions]

[geeknik]

I don't live there so I don't care.