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Old 03-08-2007, 12:52 PM   #1
Ditosta
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Join Date: May 2006
Location: http://www.neonasty.com
Posts: 2,107
Management lessons!

Management training



"Lesson One

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small
rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit on my ass like you and do
nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle, and rested. All
of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson:

To be sitting on your ass and doing nothing, you
must be sitting very high up.

Lesson Two:

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get
to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey,
"but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my manure droppings?"
replied the bull "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of manure, found it actually gave him
enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day,
after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a
fourth night, he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted
by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Management Lesson :

Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't
keep you there.

Lesson Three:

There are three lessons to be learned here. Please take note.

A little bird was flying south for the winter! . It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying
there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay
there in pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung
was actually thawing him out. He lay there all warm and happy, and
soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to
investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under
the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Management Lessons:

1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3) So when you're covered in deep shit, and you're warm comfatable and happy, it's best to keep your mouth
shut!"
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