Old Lady joke. - GoFuckYourself.com

jf2404 · 09-28-2006, 04:05 AM

An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

MattOT · 09-28-2006, 04:33 AM

hehehehehe lol

jasonir · 09-28-2006, 04:38 AM

Ahaha, good one.

Pure Evil · 09-28-2006, 05:47 AM

Sexsitesurfer · 09-28-2006, 05:49 AM

Have to remember that one!

J. Falcon · 09-28-2006, 05:55 AM

You think that might work in real life?

u-Bob · 09-28-2006, 05:57 AM

jf2404 · 09-28-2006, 05:58 AM

I doubt it.

Most cops would probably get them to open the trunk with their hand on their gun, i doubt they'd always ask for back up straight away.

E$_manager · 09-28-2006, 06:25 AM

Funny! Cool! Thank you!

Spunky · 09-28-2006, 06:26 AM

Heh heh,,that was pretty good

Klen · 09-28-2006, 06:27 AM

I heard one this before joke before but it still good.

RevSand · 09-28-2006, 06:32 AM

HAHAHA... Nice..

calibra · 09-28-2006, 06:33 AM

A nice one

Nicolas · 09-28-2006, 08:06 AM

hehe

cool1 · 09-28-2006, 08:15 AM

An oldie but still makes one laugh

sickkittens · 09-28-2006, 08:16 AM

Heard that back in 92'...still funny, though.

KingNigel · 09-28-2006, 08:30 AM

BaldBishop · 09-28-2006, 08:57 AM

Shotoku · 09-28-2006, 09:10 AM

Moe · 09-28-2006, 09:12 AM

Great stuff

Furious_Female · 09-28-2006, 09:17 AM

nice!

jf2404 · 09-28-2006, 11:03 AM

Bump for the hell of it.

Sveindt Beindt · 09-28-2006, 11:12 AM

thebossxxx · 09-28-2006, 11:46 AM

cute pretty funny..

woj · 09-28-2006, 11:58 AM

Mr. Romance · 09-28-2006, 12:04 PM

Mr. Romance

Fresh · 09-28-2006, 12:08 PM

funny old stinker

rodney25 · 09-28-2006, 10:12 PM

Funny shit!

Vitasoy · 09-28-2006, 11:00 PM

That gave me a chuckle

09-28-2006, 04:05 AM	#1
jf2404 Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: U.K Posts: 657	Old Lady joke. An older lady gets pulled over for speeding... Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Older Woman: I can't do that. Officer: Why not? Older Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Older woman: Is there a problem sir? Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

09-28-2006, 04:33 AM	#2
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09-28-2006, 04:38 AM	#3
jasonir Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Toro'no Posts: 1,887	Ahaha, good one. __________________ ICQ: 61689996

09-28-2006, 05:47 AM	#4
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09-28-2006, 05:49 AM	#5
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09-28-2006, 05:55 AM	#6
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09-28-2006, 05:57 AM	#7
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09-28-2006, 05:58 AM	#8
jf2404 Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: U.K Posts: 657	I doubt it. Most cops would probably get them to open the trunk with their hand on their gun, i doubt they'd always ask for back up straight away.

09-28-2006, 06:25 AM	#9
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09-28-2006, 06:26 AM	#10
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09-28-2006, 06:27 AM	#11
Klen Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Little Vienna Posts: 32,235	I heard one this before joke before but it still good.

09-28-2006, 06:32 AM	#12
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09-28-2006, 06:33 AM	#13
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09-28-2006, 08:06 AM	#14
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09-28-2006, 08:15 AM	#15
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09-28-2006, 08:16 AM	#16
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09-28-2006, 08:30 AM	#17
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09-28-2006, 09:12 AM	#20
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09-28-2006, 09:17 AM	#21
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09-28-2006, 11:03 AM	#22
jf2404 Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: U.K Posts: 657	Bump for the hell of it.

09-28-2006, 11:12 AM	#23
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09-28-2006, 11:46 AM	#24
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09-28-2006, 11:58 AM	#25
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09-28-2006, 12:08 PM	#27
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09-28-2006, 10:12 PM	#28
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09-28-2006, 11:00 PM	#29
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