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				Welcome to the GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum forums.  You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.  | 
		
		 
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| Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. | 
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		#1 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Sep 2002 
				Location: In your mind 
				
				
					Posts: 3,766
				 
				
				
				
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				What's your WORST "programmer gone missing" story?
			 
			"internet got cutoff" 
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
	"mother is sick" "gone to dentist" or just flat out drop off the face of the earth? what's the worst excuse you've ever heard? btw: www.pimpincoders.com fast turnaround, no excuses, quality programming ![]()  | 
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		#2 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jul 2004 
				Location: NY 
				
				
					Posts: 9,507
				 
				
				
				
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		 hahaha, i likw your footer text. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
	
	"our geeks will out-nerd your geeks"   ![]() I never had a coder missing but most are just lazy.  | 
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		#3 | 
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			 Skinemax BQueen 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Jul 2004 
				Location: Las Vegas NV 
				
				
					Posts: 2,145
				 
				
				
				
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		 I wouldnt even know where to start. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
		
		
	
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			 sex dwarf 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Join Date: May 2002 
				
				
				
					Posts: 17,860
				 
				
				
				
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		 The worst one I got was a russian claiming organized crime was after him and he had to hide  
		
	
		
		
		
		
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	/(bb|[^b]{2})/  | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jul 2004 
				Location: NY 
				
				
					Posts: 9,507
				 
				
				
				
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		 Quote: 
	
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			 Too lazy to set a custom title 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Sep 2005 
				Location: Canada 
				
				
					Posts: 10,416
				 
				
				
				
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		 Quote: 
	
 
				__________________ 
		
		
		
		
	
	skype: lordofthecameltoe  | 
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		#8 | 
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			 I can change this!!!!! 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Feb 2004 
				
				
				
					Posts: 18,972
				 
				
				
				
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		 My mother died. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
		
		
	
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		#9 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Nov 2001 
				Location: Redmond, WA 
				
				
					Posts: 2,727
				 
				
				
				
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		 I won't bore you with all the details of the program, but I had an exe distributed out to a TON of users - everything running smoothly so the programmer decides he wants to drive down to Louisianna for Madi Gras from New York and he would be gone for a week. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
	14 days later (still no word from him) I started looking for him - doing searches, phone calls and stuff... Come to find out that during the drive down he fell asleep at the wheel and was killed. Later, found out that he'd hardcoded in IP's into the exe when we had to move servers - and only he had the source code. I lost all of my users - and as bad as I got screwed - I guess he got it worse.  | 
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		#10 | 
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			 Triple OG nigga on GFY 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Mar 2002 
				Location: in the BP4L family compound 
				
				
					Posts: 27,296
				 
				
				
				
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		 i write aol punters in VB 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
		
		
	
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		#11 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jan 2005 
				
				
				
					Posts: 1,227
				 
				
				
				
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		 jailed for XXXXXX reason 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
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	if you need more than 3 clicks to get to a join page, something is wrong ;) p.s. i still bring the sales whores here.  | 
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		#12 | 
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			 vip member 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jan 2003 
				
				
				
					Posts: 17,798
				 
				
				
				
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		 This bastard told me his family was killed by American troops in Iraq and thats why he couldnt do my site!  
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
	J/K  | 
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		#13 | 
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			 I like Dutch Girls 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Join Date: Feb 2003 
				Location: dutchteencash.com 
				
				
					Posts: 21,684
				 
				
				
				
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		 I could post a few reasons  
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
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	![]() ICQ 16 91 547 - SKYPE dutchteencash bob AT dutchteencash DOT com ... did you see our newest Sweet Natural Girl Priscilla (18)?  | 
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		#14 | 
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			 Registered User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jun 2005 
				
				
				
					Posts: 1,813
				 
				
				
				
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		 I assume that with "no shitty code" as a benefit bullet you're not going after the mainstream market?   
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
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		#15 | 
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			 making it rain 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Oct 2003 
				Location: seattle 
				
				
					Posts: 22,141
				 
				
				
				
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		 I should post a list of people who are not allowed to reply in this thread  
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
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		#16 | 
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			 ( o Y o ) 
			
		
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Oct 2002 
				
				
				
					Posts: 3,108
				 
				
				
				
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		 abducted by aliens. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
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		#17 | 
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			 8.8.8.8 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Mar 2006 
				Location: Noordermarkt 
				
				
					Posts: 30,509
				 
				
				
				
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		 my coder had trouble with his GF then fixed it, and then went on a drinking rampage then told me he wasnt interrested in coding anymore...... 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
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	TAEMDLRMSKRJIXMRLSMRJ.  | 
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		#18 | 
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			 Join Date: Mar 2005 
				Location: LA 
				
				
					Posts: 4,920
				 
				
				
				
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		 "my dog ate my harddrive" 
		
	
		
		
		
		
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	Promote ONE Legal Tube Site, Collect Checks from 19 Sponsors ![]() Fresh Dave | Email: [email protected] | ICQ: 317160390  | 
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		#19 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jan 2001 
				Location: WA 
				
				
					Posts: 6,754
				 
				
				
				
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		#20 | 
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			 ►SouthOfHeaven 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Join Date: Jun 2004 
				Location: PlanetEarth MyBoardRank: GerbilMaster My-Penis-Size: extralarge MyWeapon: Computer 
				
				
					Posts: 28,609
				 
				
				
				
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		 you just reminded me to contact some people back before i make this list  
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
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	hatisblack at yahoo.com  | 
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		#21 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jan 2005 
				Location: Chicago, IL 
				
				
					Posts: 8,452
				 
				
				
				
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		 Family is always the typical response.  Whether it's a death, sickness, etc.  Programmers families have the lowest life expectancy out of any group in this world.  If your son wants to be a programmer one day, talk him out of it.  You are doomed to die a few times. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
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		#22 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Join Date: Dec 2002 
				Location: Sweden/Spain you sum bitch! 
				
				
					Posts: 6,576
				 
				
				
				
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		 I havve got so many of these stories its not even funny anymore...  
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
		
		
	
	I guess you have all heard about my indian guy, who hurt his knee and couldnt be by the computer (used a bicycle to power it)  | 
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		#23 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Sep 2002 
				Location: In your mind 
				
				
					Posts: 3,766
				 
				
				
				
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		 maybe im fortunate... dont have any stories  
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
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		#24 | |
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			 I guarantee it 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: May 2005 
				
				
				
					Posts: 18,314
				 
				
				
				
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		#26 | |
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			 Marketing Consultant 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: May 2003 
				Location: swankville, innernetz 
				
				
					Posts: 811
				 
				
				
				
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		 "Sorry man, i was baked and accidently wrote over the source code" 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
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		#27 | |
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			 ►SouthOfHeaven 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Join Date: Jun 2004 
				Location: PlanetEarth MyBoardRank: GerbilMaster My-Penis-Size: extralarge MyWeapon: Computer 
				
				
					Posts: 28,609
				 
				
				
				
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		 Quote: 
	
 
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	hatisblack at yahoo.com  | 
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		#28 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Jun 2003 
				
				
				
					Posts: 363
				 
				
				
				
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		 Hurrican Katrina  
		
	
		
		
		
		
			His wife found out he was in the adult business His girlfriend found out he was in the adult business and wanted to party 
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		#29 | 
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			 Too lazy to set a custom title 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Dec 2001 
				Location: Charlotte, NC 
				
				
					Posts: 14,137
				 
				
				
				
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		#30 | 
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			 <&(©¿©)&> 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Jul 2002 
				Location: Chicago 
				
				
					Posts: 47,882
				 
				
				
				
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				__________________ 
		
		
		
		
	
	Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000 Affiliate program tools: Hosted Galleries Manager Banner Manager Video Manager ![]() Wordpress Affiliate Plugin Pic/Movie of the Day Fansign Generator Zip Manager  | 
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		#31 | |
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			 frc 
			
		
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Jul 2003 
				Location: Bitcoin wallet 
				
				
					Posts: 4,663
				 
				
				
				
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	Crazy fast VPS for $10 a month. Try with $20 free credit  | 
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		#32 | |
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Apr 2006 
				Location: Easy Webcam Pro 
				
				
					Posts: 1,213
				 
				
				
				
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		 Quote: 
	
 
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	[email protected]  | 
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		#33 | |
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			 ICQ- five seven 0 2 5 5 0 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jan 2001 
				
				
				
					Posts: 10,747
				 
				
				
				
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		 Quote: 
	
 Or is it back on? PS: Worst generic story that Crypt and I crack on is when the coder's 54th grandfather dies. It's like 'dude, for real you have that many grandparents? You just used that excuse last month, please write them down so you can rotate them appropriately."   ![]() 
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	Investor with 5m - 15m USD to invest. Do you have a site or network of sites earning 50k - 200k a month income? Email your contact and preliminary data to: domain.cashventures (at) gmail.com....Please...no tire kickers...serious offers and inquiries only.  | 
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		#34 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Jun 2005 
				Location: Irvine, CA 
				
				
					Posts: 2,442
				 
				
				
				
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		 i dont think we should pick on coders (cuz that is how i got my start hehe).. designers are just as bad  
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
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		#35 | 
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			 Is on the 1 
			
		
			
				
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Sep 2002 
				Location: Philly Burbs 
				
				
					Posts: 4,996
				 
				
				
				
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		 Here is the I just took a deal script I think some have: 
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
	Moving from their apartment to _______________ and the Internet there isnt up because _______________ and then I had to travel out of town becuause of ______________ and so on so on so on so on  | 
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		#36 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Industry Role:  
				Join Date: Nov 2003 
				Location: Olongapo City, Philippines 
				
				
					Posts: 4,618
				 
				
				
				
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		 Outsourced a Visual Basic desktop quote delivery engine for a major US insurance company, to an Indian student at a school here in the US. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
	Two weeks before deadline, the app wasn't done, she called me from India saying she was deported! I learned Visual Basic in about a week, spent the next 6 days coding 24/7 (very close to it) and delivered on time  | 
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		#37 | 
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			 Registered User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Mar 2006 
				
				
				
					Posts: 26
				 
				
				
				
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		 LOL as a business owner, I have put up with a fucking full year of excuses, and covering up for him to the investors...but anyway he's gone now, and I am looking for one as we speak. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			I rarely hire from within the industry only because of policy from the investor group. Basically fear of intellectual property theft, or leakage of sensitive info. Personally I would hire from within the industry, to get the results I want quicker, but we're doing alright, and I've just nearly put together the perfect team in terms of skill set and matching work ethic, etc... My solution to the possiblity of leaking info would be a solid NDA which we have in place with everyone anyway, but I would definitely go on a contract basis per project, not full time full benefits and obscenely large salaries... I would rather put the money to a good lawyer and work with industry programmers and have the lawyer there just in case...lol. But yeah, I could write all night the MIA stories I've come across. 
				__________________ 
		
		
		
		
	
	Michael Matic, CNE EET Computer Networks Engineering / Electrical Engineering Technologist   Current Mag that I Like to Read for New Gadgets and Tech Trends ~My Real Site will be coming SOON As of April 1st 2007 Mike Matic has nothing to do wtih Porn Excellence Inc. The Company has been moved and sold to a great individual in Miami FL, who will be conducting business for PE INC from the date mentioned above. I am taking a different direction in life, but I am still working on developing a new idea to serve the adult industry so I hope to have this up by 2008. I plan to continue my work towards a masters degree and work on new developments and ideas I have in the meantime. If anyone has interesting offers or opportunities please do give a shout, otherwise we'll meet again soon. ICQ# 295366948 Alternative Contact: v[email protected]  | 
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		#38 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Dec 2003 
				Location: 1123,6536,5231 
				
				
					Posts: 3,397
				 
				
				
				
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		 How about you pay him and he COMPLETELY disappears. Disconnects phone, and won't answer emails. Even though you see him posting on web development forums. 
		
	
		
		
		
		
		
	
	Hi Gabriel Bauman ie gbauman!  | 
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		#39 | 
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			 Confirmed User 
			
		
			
			
			Join Date: Dec 2004 
				Location: Michigan 
				
				
					Posts: 405
				 
				
				
				
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		 I've had my fair share in the past 5 years, but I had this awesome programmer from Australia work for me for about a year, then suddenly started coming up with excuses: 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
		
		
	
	"We're redoing the wood floors and the fumes got to me, so I had to take a few days off" 6 days later, I get "My power supply died on me and I have to get a whole new computer." I respond with, "Why would you have to get a whole new computer if it was just your power supply?" "Oh, it ruined the motherboard too." "I didn't realize it's been 2 weeks since I last talked to you" And many many many more... I even paid him for a project upfront because he needed the money. He disappeared a few days after that and I never heard from him again. Pretty sad because I did enjoy working with him.  | 
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