THE OFFICIAL REDNECK AGENDA -Get 'er Done!!

[Wizzo]

So here it is folks, we've been busier than a cat covering up crap on a marble floor gettin' ready for this gooder than grits event! For those comin' down make note of the contest friday night we'll see ya'll there!

Friday June 2nd, 2006

Noon-6:00 pm
-Check in and Registration
-Socializing around the bar and pool with Free drinks!
-Keg stands with Scott from DVD Superstars!


6:00 pm- 8:00 pm
-Buffet Dinner by the Pool!
Please dress in your fanciest redneck attire for dinner!

9:00 pm
-BEST REDNECK COSTUME CONTEST!!!
Show off your redneck gear and win some kick ass prizes for the best dressed Male and Female Dressed Redneck!

10:00 pm- ??
-Live band in the bar - Free Drinks all night
-Penthouse Hospitality Suite Party!
-Dancin' on the tables with Joe from SexSearch!

Saturday June 3rd, 2006

9:00 am-11:30 am
-Breakfast will be served off the menu Restaurant
-Early mornin' beer bongin' with Sam from GXbill!

11:30 am-1:30 am
-Lunch Served Buffet Style

12:00 pm-4:00 pm
-1ST ANNUAL WEBMASTER BEER PONG TOURNEY!!!
Single elimination- Prizes for the winners!

5:30 PM SHARP
-Meeting for the 365Billing.com Jungle Queen Dinner Excursion

7:00 pm-11:00 pm
-The 365Billing.com Jungle Queen Dinner Excursion
BBQ style dinner served on an island with a themed show presentation!

11:00 pm- ??
-Live band in the bar - Free Drinks all night
-Penthouse Hospitality Suite Party!

Sunday June 4th, 2006

9:00 am-11:00 am
-Breakfast served off the menu
-Sunday mornin' communion of Triskets and Tequila with brother atom from Infinity Billing

11:00AM GET THE FUCK OUT AND RECOVER FROM A AWESOME REDNECK GETAWAY WEEKEND!!!!

[Pete-KT]

This is gonna be a FUCKIN BLAST

[joefresh]

Looking forward to another GREAT EVENT !!!

Hopefully this time I won't toss my cookies over the boat !

[kristin]

Sweet crack ... I'm excited.

[MickeyG]

Looking forward to it

[Wizzo]

The contest prizes are going to be off the hook BTW....

[Ramos]

Double Wide!!!!!!!!!!!

[Mayor]

$1000 to anyone who can catch something bigger than what MEGA and DPS caught yesterday on the docks.




Fortunately they practice catch and release and they released me the the hospital where I spent my evening. Fishing with me is dangerous

[DigitalPimpShit]

At least I didn't send you to the taxidermist

[L0rdJuni0r]

sounds like a nice event!

[Mr. Romance]

Wish i could make it with you sum bitches.....



Mr. Romance

[OMG Jim]

Looks like the BIGGEST fish has already been caught

Damn that looks painful Mayor. Hope you're feelin' no pain after the hospital visit. Did you meet any nice Nurses?

_

[sltr]

Originally Posted by Wizzo

-Keg stands with Scott from DVD Superstar!

YESSA!!!1

[kristin]

Why do I have a feeling I'm gonna come back with a beer belly?

[Jon Clark - BANNED FOR LIFE]

You might be a redneck if..............

[sandman!]

You Might Be A Redneck If . . .

. . . you were acquitted for murdering your first wife after she threw out your Elvis 45?s.

. . . you think watching professional wrestling is foreplay.

. . . your front porch collapses and four dogs get killed.

. . . you no longer drink wine ever since the screw cap got caught up your nose.

. . . you think that Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

. . . that billboard that says, ?Say No To Crack? reminds you to pull up your jeans.

. . . your wife?s hairdo was ever ruined by a ceiling fan.

. . . you go to your family reunions looking for a date.

. . . you think a Volvo is part of a woman?s anatomy.

. . . your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.

. . . you?ve got more than three cousins named ?Bubba?.

. . . you have an Elvis Jell-O mold.

. . . taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.

. . . you?ve got more than one other named ?Darryl?.

. . . you ever won first prize in a tobacco spittin? contest.

. . . on Thanksgiving Day you have to decide which pet to eat.

. . . you?ve ever come home and found crime scene tape across your front porch.

. . . your favorite entree is Spam barbecued on the grill.

. . . your child?s first words were, ?Attention K-Mart shoppers!?.

. . . your idea of high-quality entertainment is a six-pack and a bug-zapper.

. . . your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She got to readin?.

. . . you think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are ?Gentlemen, start your engines.?

. . . you kissed your own wife at midnight at the New Year?s Eve party.

. . . you?ve ever taken reading material into an airplane restroom.

. . . you?ve ever gotten an official letter of recognition from a tobacco or beer company.

. . . you vacuum the sheets instead of washing them.

. . . you?ve ever valet parked a snow plow.

. . . you?ve ever stood in line to have your picture made with a freak of nature.

. . . you break wind in public and blame it on your kid.

. . . you?ve ever had to siphon gas from your lawn mower to put into your truck.

. . . you?ve ever paid for a six-pack of beer with pennies.

. . . there are hubcap wind chimes anywhere on your block.

. . . you have a Bud Light pool-table light hanging over your dining room table.

. . . the strongest smell in your house is butane.

. . . you think paprika is a Third World country.

. . . you ask the preacher, ?How?s it hanging??

. . . you go to a stock car race and don?t need a program.

. . . you have a bumper sticker that says, ?My mother?s an honor student? at the local junior high.

. . . you think potted meat on a saltine is an hors d?oeuvre.

. . . you played the banjo in your high school band.

. . . the velvet paintings in your house were bought from an art dealer on the side of the highway.

. . . you have no hubcaps on your car because you?re using them to feed your hunting dogs.

. . . you can?t visit relatives without getting mud on your tires.

. . . your mother doesn?t put shoes on to go grocery shopping.

. . . you?ve ever been blacklisted by a bowling alley.

. . . you honest-to-God think women are turned on by animal noises and seductive tongue gestures.

. . . anyone in your family has ever purchased peroxide in a gallon container.

. . . you don?t think baseball players spit and scratch too much.

. . . you?ve ever been to a wedding reception at the Waffle House.

. . . your dog has ever brought home something that you cooked for dinner.

. . . you owe a taxidermist more than your monthly income.

. . . you?ve ever caught bugs just so you could throw them in the bug zapper.

. . . you have a Hefty Bag for a passenger-side window.

. . . you?ve ever hollered, ?Rock the house, Bubba!? during a piano recital.

. . . your kids? favorite bedtime story is ?Curious George and the High Voltage Fence.?

. . . your watchband is wider than any book you?ve ever read.

. . . you know who is actually leading the Winston Cup series.

. . . you?ve ever had to turn your pickup truck around because of bridge clearance restrictions.

. . . your favorite beer company cannot afford to advertise.

. . . you?ve ever barbecued Spam on the grill.

. . . you time your belches to achieve a personal best.

. . . your new job promotion means that the company foots the bill to have your name sewn on your shirts.

. . . the fountain at your wedding spewed beer instead of champagne.

. . . your favorite restaurant has the word ?eats? anywhere in the name.

. . . there?s graffiti on the bathroom wall in your own house.

. . . you have grease under your toenails.

. . . your idea of a romantic evening is sharing the same spit cup with your girlfriend at a tractor pull.

. . . the most common phrase you hear at your family reunion is ?What the hell are you lookin? at Diphead??

. . . your best coon hound gets a birthday present and your wife doesn?t.

. . . your mother has more chest hair than your father.

. . . you think Campho-Phenique is a miracle drug.

. . . you think a manicure is some kind of French doctor.

. . . your mama saves aluminum foil.

. . . you have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior.

. . . you clean your house with a water hose.

. . . during the wedding ceremony the minister said, ?Do you, DeWayne, take Connie to be your old lady??

. . . the game warden knows the serial numbers to your guns by heart.

. . . you pawned your grandfather?s pocket watch because you needed beer money for the weekend.

. . . you took your coon dogs on your honeymoon.

. . . you drive across town to see a car wreck.

. . . it?s impossible to see food stains on the fabric of your work uniform.

. . . you think that anyone with ten fingers and toes is abnormal.

. . . you need one more hole punched in your card before you get a ?freebie? at the House of Tattoos.

. . . you have a personal account of a UFO sighting.

. . . you think a hard drive is driving more than one hour.

. . . you?ve ever taken a generator and a 27-inch TV camping.

. . . you help booby trap your family?s marijuana crop.

. . . you have ever made a frog-gigging spear.

. . . the last time you saw your daddy outside, he was picking up trash, chained to three other guys.

. . . your mother?s only shoes are house slippers.

. . . your sewage system consists of a pipe down a hillside.

. . . you wear knee-high stockings with a skirt.

. . . you follow the tractor pull circuit.

. . . you have more electronic equipment in your truck than in your house.

. . . your primary income involves pigs or manure.

. . . your best sofa came out of a Chevrolet.

. . . your favorite T-shirt is declared offensive in at least 13 states.

. . . you were expelled from summer school.

. . . you?ve ever been asked for your autograph at a rattlesnake roundup.

. . . you attend a parent-teacher conference wearing flip-flops.

. . . your baby?s crib mobile is made out of beer cans.

. . . you?ve ever been asked to leave Shoney?s all-you-can-eat breakfast.

. . . you have a grave in your yard.

. . . you?ve ever stolen toilet paper.

. . . you think the theory of relativity has something to do with inbreeding.

. . . your deceased hunting dog?s tombstone is larger than your grandfather?s.

. . . you wake up in the morning already dressed for work.

. . . you think the police can?t see you because your truck is painted camouflage.

. . . your car ashtray is so packed, you can?t get it out.

. . . you think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.

. . . you?re driving a vehicle with no original body parts.

. . . you quit your job because deer season?s fixin? to start.

. . . your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby due to an alien abduction.

. . . you?ve ever gotten into a fist fight over a bowling score.

. . . you?re a member of the ?Chaw of the Month Club.?

. . . your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.

. . . you?ve ever been hunting on a tractor.

. . . your yard has more than ten ceramic figurines.

. . . you think the ultimate beauty treatment is using Preparation-H to prevent wrinkles.

. . . you must go through more than 2 gates to get to your home.

. . . you?ve never seen a film with subtitles.

. . . you own a pair of cut-offs made from double-knit pants.

. . . you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.

. . . you?ve ever talked back to characters on the movie screen.

. . . you won?t stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.

. . . your kids hide the Easter eggs under cow patties.

. . . your kids trip over the Christmas lights while hunting for Easter eggs.

. . . three-fourths of all the clothes you own have logos on them.

. . . when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is how to lose them.

. . . your gene pool doesn?t have a ?deep end.?

. . . you can?t marry your sweetheart because there is a law against it.

. . . you?ve ever laid rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.

. . . getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.

. . . you dated your daddy?s current wife in high school.

. . . you?ve ever towed another car using panty hose and duct tape.

. . . your coat of arms features a tire iron.

. . . you own a denim leisure suit.

[uno]

This is going to rock.

[uno]

Originally Posted by Mayor

$1000 to anyone who can catch something bigger than what MEGA and DPS caught yesterday on the docks.




Fortunately they practice catch and release and they released me the the hospital where I spent my evening. Fishing with me is dangerous

I hope he was up on his shots.

[Odie]

looks awesome guys!! wish I could join y'all down there!

[JFK]

Sounds Great Wizzo, see you in a couple of days

[wiggitywack]

9:00 am-11:30 am
-Breakfast will be served off the menu Restaurant
-Early mornin' beer bongin' with Sam from GXbill!


oh boy....going to be hammered very early on Saturday...looking fwd to it!

[seeric]

we are rollin in somewhere around 2pm.

[Tylo]

See ya guys when you get here!!

[Jace]

is there an attendee list anywhere?

can't wait to get there, this is gunna be a blast

should we have gotten an email confirmation or anything like that? ir is everything set already?

[sltr]

Originally Posted by Jace

is there an attendee list anywhere?

can't wait to get there, this is gunna be a blast

should we have gotten an email confirmation or anything like that? ir is everything set already?

u and tabitha are all set!

holler on icq if ya need anything

cya there,

Scott

[Karupted Charles]

Looking forward to a great time.

[LittleMack]

Will be there, I wont be getting in until around 7pm, see check in ends at 6pm is that going to be an issue?

[Jace]

Originally Posted by sltr

u and tabitha are all set!

holler on icq if ya need anything

cya there,

Scott

Thanks Scott, we can't wait to meet ya and chat about some more business

This is really going to be a nice getaway, lots of cool peeps seem to be on the list

[Hollywood Horwitz]

damn this looks like loads of fun, wish i was gonna be there..

[SleazyDream]

i sooo am gona wish i was there

[ChefJeff]

What the hell is a keg stand? Am I an old fart for not knowing that?


We'll be there!

[Jace]

Originally Posted by ChefJeff

What the hell is a keg stand? Am I an old fart for not knowing that?


We'll be there!

you grab the sides of the keg with your hands and do a handstand over the keg while everyone holds you, and they put the beer tap into your mouth and you swallow as much as you can

[minusonebit]

Sounds like fun. Where the fuck is this taking place again?

[Jace]

Originally Posted by minusonebit

Sounds like fun. Where the fuck is this taking place again?

www.redneckgetaway.com

[Jace]

is this what we are doing saturday night? http://junglequeen.com/dnn/BBQDinner...9/Default.aspx

if so, I can't WAIT to see the Variety Review...hahaha

[Barefootsies]

Originally Posted by Jace

you grab the sides of the keg with your hands and do a handstand over the keg while everyone holds you, and they put the beer tap into your mouth and you swallow as much as you can

[wiggitywack]

Originally Posted by SleazyDream

i sooo am gona wish i was there

why arent u going man?

[LittleMack]

Cya all there...going to be a great time

[wiggitywack]

right on...from beer bong to beer pong...got all the bases covered!

[ChefJeff]

My goal is to win the beer pong tournament

[LittleMack]

Originally Posted by ChefJeff

My goal is to win the beer pong tournament

game on man!!

[Doctor Dre]

Originally Posted by wiggitywack

why arent u going man?

He's taking a break from shows

[Bro Media - BANNED FOR LIFE]

im a redneck

[sltr]

Originally Posted by Jace

Thanks Scott, we can't wait to meet ya and chat about some more business

This is really going to be a nice getaway, lots of cool peeps seem to be on the list

lookign forward to it too !!

[Jace]

my wife just informed me that the only thing she asks of everyone there this weekend....DRAMA FREE!!!!

She has had a horrible past 2 weeks and really needs to relax, so no one can start shit or bring up drama the entire weekend!!!!!

[pr0]

Originally Posted by Jace

my wife just informed me that the only thing she asks of everyone there this weekend....DRAMA FREE!!!!

She has had a horrible past 2 weeks and really needs to relax, so no one can start shit or bring up drama the entire weekend!!!!!

its invite only....they didn't invite any idiots who start shit

[sltr]

Originally Posted by Jace

my wife just informed me that the only thing she asks of everyone there this weekend....DRAMA FREE!!!!

She has had a horrible past 2 weeks and really needs to relax, so no one can start shit or bring up drama the entire weekend!!!!!

i checked the attendee list and the drama llama is not on it

[Jace]

Originally Posted by pr0

its invite only....they didn't invite any idiots who start shit

ROFL...thank god!

[wiggitywack]

I had a last minute cancellation so I have a invite up for grabs.

hit me up [email protected] if you want it

[Zuzana Designs]

I will be there and I'm going to wimp ass in beer pong