Joke of the day - GoFuckYourself.com

VicJay · 04-04-2006, 08:23 AM

One morning a woman was walking out of her front door, when she notices a strange little man at the bottom of her garden.

"You're a goblin," she says, "I caught you and you owe me three wishes!". So the goblin replies "OK, you caught me fair and square, what's your first wish?". The woman stops and thinks for a second, "I want a huge mansion to live in.", goblins replies "OK, you've got it.". Woman again thinks it over, "My second wish is a Mercedes." "OK, you've got that too." "My last wish is a million dollars!". The goblin then says "OK, you've got it. But to make your wishes come true you have to have sex all night with me." "OK then, if that's what it takes..."

Next morning the little man wakes the woman up.

"Tell me," says the man, "how old are you?" "I'm 27", she replies

"Fuck me", says the man, "27 and you still believe in goblins"

u-Bob · 04-04-2006, 08:26 AM

lol

Sexsitesurfer · 04-04-2006, 08:26 AM

Cool!

Got a smile out of me!

Manowar · 04-04-2006, 08:27 AM

Jim3k · 04-04-2006, 08:51 AM

lollll !

domeconnection · 04-04-2006, 08:52 AM

haha good one

keyDet79 · 04-04-2006, 09:26 AM

Here's another:

A Chinese guy who doesn't speak english walks into a drug store and wants to buy some condoms. So he walks up to the desk, looks at the pretty lady with a smile, unzips his pants, takes his dick out and lays it on the counter along with a $5 note next to it, and looks at her. The lady gets the idea and without thinking for too long gives him a pack of condoms, and he walks out.

Next day, 2 Chinamen walk into the drug store, walk up to the desk, unzip their pants, take out their dicks and lay them on the counter with $5 notes next to it, and look at her with a smile. She gets the idea, gives them a pack of condoms and they walk out.

The day after, 3 Chinese guys walk into that drug store, only this time there's a man behind the counter. They unzip their pants, take their dicks and put them on the table, along with $5 notes next to them, smile and look at him.

He looks at them and thinks for a minute, then says OK, puts $5 next to him, unzips his pants, lays his dick on the counter, looks at them with a smile and takes all the money from the table.

cranki · 04-04-2006, 09:29 AM

hahha nice ones

practiceTITOISM · 04-04-2006, 09:39 AM

That goblin one made my day!

VicJay · 04-04-2006, 01:02 PM

Chinese joke was funny

check this one out:

One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted to him and, during her questions about his life, she asked him how he managed for sex. "What's that?" he asked. She explained to him what sex was, and he said, "Oh,Tarzan use hole in trunk of tree."

Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have that all wrong! I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, lay down on the ground, and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, pointing, "You must put it in here."

Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, "Why the hell did you do that?"

"Tarzan check for bees!"

calibra · 04-04-2006, 01:07 PM

Thanks, dude!

d_train · 04-04-2006, 08:03 PM

this is a feel good thread

alec · 04-04-2006, 08:11 PM

I bet that one is classified on the blonde jokes category..

Spunky · 04-04-2006, 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VicJay

Chinese joke was funny

check this one out:

One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted to him and, during her questions about his life, she asked him how he managed for sex. "What's that?" he asked. She explained to him what sex was, and he said, "Oh,Tarzan use hole in trunk of tree."

Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have that all wrong! I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, lay down on the ground, and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, pointing, "You must put it in here."

Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, "Why the hell did you do that?"

"Tarzan check for bees!"

I liked that one the best

Bob_cougar · 04-04-2006, 08:27 PM

that's the height of stupidity

rodney25 · 04-04-2006, 09:38 PM

That was really cool!

jewel523 · 04-04-2006, 10:01 PM

tristan_D · 04-05-2006, 12:22 AM

I have heard that Tarzan and Jane joke before. It still makes me laugh

Vitasoy · 04-05-2006, 12:37 AM

Those crack me up, lol

Jhaffgina · 04-05-2006, 12:58 AM

Still makes me lough lol.

VicJay · 04-06-2006, 12:12 PM

This one also made me laugh

A police officer was patrolling the highway when he sees a guy tied up to a tree, crying.
The officer stops and approaches the guy. "What's going on here?", he asks.
The guy sobs, "I was driving and picked up a hitchhiker. He pulled a gun on me, robbed me, took all my money, my clothes, my car and then tied me up."
The cop studied the guy for a moment, and then pulled down his pants and whipped out his dick. "I guess this isn't your lucky day, pal!"

axelcat · 04-06-2006, 12:17 PM

gecko · 04-06-2006, 10:45 PM

maxxx_fucktor · 04-07-2006, 12:08 AM

Wtf! that cracks me up!

VicJay · 04-07-2006, 05:35 AM

Three explorers are captured by a tribe in the Amazon jungle. The chief is going to punish the intruders. He calls the first explorer to the front of the tribe and asks, "Death or Booka?!". Well the explorer doesn't want to die, so he opts for booka. The tribe starts screaming BOOKA! and dancing around. the cheif then rips the explorers pants off and fucks him in the ass.

The cheif calls the second explorer to the front and asks, "Death or Booka?!". Well not wanting to die either, he opts for booka. The tribe again starts screaming BOOKA! and dancing around. The cheif rips the second guys pants off and fucks him in the ass.

The chief calls the third explorer to the front and asks, "Death or Booka?!". Well the third guy has a little more self respect and thinks death would be better than being violated in front of hundreds of tribesman, so he opts for death. The chief turns to the tribe and screams "DEATH BY BOOKA!"

Dirty Politician · 04-07-2006, 05:41 AM

Good ones. Death bookad.

pornsearcher · 04-07-2006, 05:47 AM

nice jokes

Th!nk · 04-07-2006, 07:52 AM

lOL! good one

Pete-KT · 04-07-2006, 08:05 AM

These are all good ones

04-04-2006, 08:23 AM	#1
VicJay Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 1,622	Joke of the day One morning a woman was walking out of her front door, when she notices a strange little man at the bottom of her garden. "You're a goblin," she says, "I caught you and you owe me three wishes!". So the goblin replies "OK, you caught me fair and square, what's your first wish?". The woman stops and thinks for a second, "I want a huge mansion to live in.", goblins replies "OK, you've got it.". Woman again thinks it over, "My second wish is a Mercedes." "OK, you've got that too." "My last wish is a million dollars!". The goblin then says "OK, you've got it. But to make your wishes come true you have to have sex all night with me." "OK then, if that's what it takes..." Next morning the little man wakes the woman up. "Tell me," says the man, "how old are you?" "I'm 27", she replies "Fuck me", says the man, "27 and you still believe in goblins" __________________ Use Xeon Vega CMS: It's reliable and fast learning script that provides you with the most efficient control over your paysites! Increase your traffic using Xeon TGP/MGP scripts with its unique thumbnail rotator, advance stats and gallery checker! Xeon Paysite Reviews – interactive manager that allows you to categorize your reviews, add a hardlinks trades and announcements for new reviews!

04-04-2006, 08:26 AM	#3
Sexsitesurfer Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Porn land Posts: 3,157	Cool! Got a smile out of me! __________________ Paul DDF Productions Marketing manager Skype: Marketing.DDF ICQ: 316302313 Cell: +36 30 732 6076 [email protected]

04-04-2006, 08:51 AM	#5
Jim3k Confirmed User Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 314	lollll ! __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

04-04-2006, 08:52 AM	#6
domeconnection Registered User Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 52	haha good one __________________ Dome Connection - Adult Dating Check out our affiliate program We pay for every free membership you refer and 50% on sales generated by those members!

04-04-2006, 09:26 AM	#7
keyDet79 Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Netherlands Posts: 1,109	Here's another: A Chinese guy who doesn't speak english walks into a drug store and wants to buy some condoms. So he walks up to the desk, looks at the pretty lady with a smile, unzips his pants, takes his dick out and lays it on the counter along with a $5 note next to it, and looks at her. The lady gets the idea and without thinking for too long gives him a pack of condoms, and he walks out. Next day, 2 Chinamen walk into the drug store, walk up to the desk, unzip their pants, take out their dicks and lay them on the counter with $5 notes next to it, and look at her with a smile. She gets the idea, gives them a pack of condoms and they walk out. The day after, 3 Chinese guys walk into that drug store, only this time there's a man behind the counter. They unzip their pants, take their dicks and put them on the table, along with $5 notes next to them, smile and look at him. He looks at them and thinks for a minute, then says OK, puts $5 next to him, unzips his pants, lays his dick on the counter, looks at them with a smile and takes all the money from the table. __________________ Multihomed quality BW for less ICQ 51034232 - MSN [email protected] - Email keydet(at)vibehosting.com

04-04-2006, 08:26 AM	#2
u-Bob there's no $$$ in porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: icq: 195./568.-230 (btw: not getting offline msgs) Posts: 33,063	lol

04-04-2006, 08:27 AM	#4
Manowar jellyfish Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 71,528

04-04-2006, 09:29 AM	#8
cranki Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Café del Mar Posts: 5,162	hahha nice ones

04-04-2006, 09:39 AM	#9
practiceTITOISM Confirmed User Join Date: May 2005 Location: Illinois Posts: 441	That goblin one made my day!

04-04-2006, 01:02 PM	#10
VicJay Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 1,622	Chinese joke was funny check this one out: One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted to him and, during her questions about his life, she asked him how he managed for sex. "What's that?" he asked. She explained to him what sex was, and he said, "Oh,Tarzan use hole in trunk of tree." Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have that all wrong! I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, lay down on the ground, and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, pointing, "You must put it in here." Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, "Why the hell did you do that?" "Tarzan check for bees!" __________________ Use Xeon Vega CMS: It's reliable and fast learning script that provides you with the most efficient control over your paysites! Increase your traffic using Xeon TGP/MGP scripts with its unique thumbnail rotator, advance stats and gallery checker! Xeon Paysite Reviews – interactive manager that allows you to categorize your reviews, add a hardlinks trades and announcements for new reviews!

04-04-2006, 01:07 PM	#11
calibra Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 4,357	Thanks, dude! __________________ GetCyberCash.com

04-04-2006, 08:03 PM	#12
d_train Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 1,527	this is a feel good thread __________________ EXTREME Hosting Services -- Extreme Dependability -- Low Pricing FREE TOOL to check your site's content originality and increase your Search Engine ranking

04-04-2006, 08:11 PM	#13
alec Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 1,877	I bet that one is classified on the blonde jokes category.. __________________

04-04-2006, 08:27 PM	#15
Bob_cougar Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 1,935	that's the height of stupidity __________________

04-04-2006, 09:38 PM	#16
rodney25 Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 7,090	That was really cool! __________________ AFFORDABLE Hosting -- Extreme Dependability -- FULL Service ICQ ME for DAMN GOOD HOSTING DEALS: 5380773

04-04-2006, 10:01 PM	#17
jewel523 Registered User Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 9

04-05-2006, 12:22 AM	#18
tristan_D Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 7,865	I have heard that Tarzan and Jane joke before. It still makes me laugh __________________ Increase your sales. Up to $4 per click.

04-05-2006, 12:37 AM	#19
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	Those crack me up, lol __________________ [email protected]

04-05-2006, 12:58 AM	#20
Jhaffgina Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 180	Still makes me lough lol.

04-06-2006, 12:12 PM	#21
VicJay Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 1,622	This one also made me laugh A police officer was patrolling the highway when he sees a guy tied up to a tree, crying. The officer stops and approaches the guy. "What's going on here?", he asks. The guy sobs, "I was driving and picked up a hitchhiker. He pulled a gun on me, robbed me, took all my money, my clothes, my car and then tied me up." The cop studied the guy for a moment, and then pulled down his pants and whipped out his dick. "I guess this isn't your lucky day, pal!" __________________ Use Xeon Vega CMS: It's reliable and fast learning script that provides you with the most efficient control over your paysites! Increase your traffic using Xeon TGP/MGP scripts with its unique thumbnail rotator, advance stats and gallery checker! Xeon Paysite Reviews – interactive manager that allows you to categorize your reviews, add a hardlinks trades and announcements for new reviews!

04-06-2006, 12:17 PM	#22
axelcat Adult Locals Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: West Coast Posts: 25,450

04-06-2006, 10:45 PM	#23
gecko ****** Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 21,846	__________________ [email protected]

04-07-2006, 12:08 AM	#24
maxxx_fucktor Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 1,498	Wtf! that cracks me up! __________________

04-07-2006, 05:35 AM	#25
VicJay Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 1,622	Three explorers are captured by a tribe in the Amazon jungle. The chief is going to punish the intruders. He calls the first explorer to the front of the tribe and asks, "Death or Booka?!". Well the explorer doesn't want to die, so he opts for booka. The tribe starts screaming BOOKA! and dancing around. the cheif then rips the explorers pants off and fucks him in the ass. The cheif calls the second explorer to the front and asks, "Death or Booka?!". Well not wanting to die either, he opts for booka. The tribe again starts screaming BOOKA! and dancing around. The cheif rips the second guys pants off and fucks him in the ass. The chief calls the third explorer to the front and asks, "Death or Booka?!". Well the third guy has a little more self respect and thinks death would be better than being violated in front of hundreds of tribesman, so he opts for death. The chief turns to the tribe and screams "DEATH BY BOOKA!" __________________ Use Xeon Vega CMS: It's reliable and fast learning script that provides you with the most efficient control over your paysites! Increase your traffic using Xeon TGP/MGP scripts with its unique thumbnail rotator, advance stats and gallery checker! Xeon Paysite Reviews – interactive manager that allows you to categorize your reviews, add a hardlinks trades and announcements for new reviews!

04-07-2006, 05:41 AM	#26
Dirty Politician Registered User Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 21	Good ones. Death bookad.

04-07-2006, 05:47 AM	#27
pornsearcher Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 1,735	nice jokes

04-07-2006, 07:52 AM	#28
Th!nk Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 6,996	lOL! good one

04-07-2006, 08:05 AM	#29
Pete-KT Workin With The Devil Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: West Bloomfield, MI Posts: 51,532	These are all good ones