This audacious spam cracked me up! - GoFuckYourself.com

SilentKnight · 02-18-2006, 11:02 AM

Dear Silent Knight,

I'm sorry you will be unable to join us at the upcoming International Society of Photographers Annual Convention and Symposium, March 3-5, 2006 to be held at the famed Riviera Hotel and Casino in lase Vegas, Nevada, as it promises to be one of the most exciting and prestigious photography events ever held. As you know, you were selected to be honored at this event, and we were looking forward to you presenting your photographic artistry in front of hundreds of photographers and guests from over a dozen countries who will be attending.

However, because we don't want you to miss out on this unique opportunity altogether, we have arranged a way for you and your photographic accomplishments to be a part of this event in a major way, without your actually being present. Although you will be unable to participate in the convention contest (you must be present to win), you can receive all of the awards you have earned--including your custom-engraved Outstanding Achievement in Photography Silver Award Bowl (see it here), your bronze Commemorative Award Medallion, and your Full Basic Membership into the International Society of Photographers for 2006--if you will allow us to showcase at the convention in your place.

In this regard, we have arranged for your photo "Moonlight over Niagara" (see your photo here) to be presented at our convention. Your photograph, along with your name, will be presented exactly as you created it for all convention attendees to view. In this way, hundreds of attending photographers and their guests, who come from all over the world to attend the convention, will appreciate your photograph.

And let me tell you a little about the actual awards and ISP membership benefits that you will receive by mail immediately after you confirm your participation in this prestigious event by allowing us to showcase your photo:

-- Your Outstanding Achievement in Photography Silver Award Bowl (a $200.00 value) is a magnificent work of art in itself that measures over 10 inches across and over 11 inches high. It is handcrafted in silver and has your name custom-engraved on a beautiful cherry-wood base (see it here). It is certain to enjoy a special place of pride in your home and will serve as a fitting symbol of your unique photographic artistry.

-- Your bronze Commemorative Award Medallion is a deeply etched bronze medal (a $40.00 value) brilliantly displayed on a 25-inch red, white and blue satin ribbon.

-- And your Full Basic Membership into the International Society of Photographers for 2006 (a $60.00 value) entitles you to a personalized membership card, special discounts and contests, and a free subscription to our quarterly newsletter. Please note, if you are already an ISP member, your benefits will be extended an additional year.

Silent Knight, all that's required for us to immediately send you all of these Awards is for you to give us permission to display your photograph, "Moonlight over Niagara". Additionally, because you will not be present, we must also ask you for the necessary funds ($169.00 plus p+h) to cover the costs of the time and effort required to present your photography before the convention attendees, and to cover the costs incurred in insuring and shipping to you these extremely bulky and heavy awards.

Silent Knight, we are, of course, ultimately most interested in meeting you and having you personally present your artistry in front of the thousands of other photographers who attend these live events. Unfortunately, this is not the case at this time, so we're trying to do the next best thing. But we sincerely hope to personally present you with your most deserved awards in the future.
Sincerely,

Craig Foster
International Society of Photographers
Convention Awards Chairperson

SilentKnight · 02-18-2006, 11:30 AM

Normally I don't reply to spam of course, but since I'd had some dealings with these clowns in the past, I couldn't resist sending them the following the other night:

-------------------

Mr. Foster,

After receiving the letter from you (quoted below) - I felt compelled to reply and pass along to you a few of my thoughts about your organization and marketing tactics.

You solicit photographic submissions from artists and photographers from around the world, publish their freely-donated photos in your coffeetable books, sell the books for a profit - and then have the gall to attempt charging submitting photographers for a copy of the book.

As if that's not enough - now you spam me with this utter bullshit "awards convention" and make it sound as though I'm eligible for some sort of award of merit. And surprise...surprise - I only have to pay you $169 plus shipping and handling to receive this ridiculous "award".

Its bad enough that you scam photographers to make a profit for your organization this way. Its even more repugnant and audacious that you insult my intelligence with this utter nonsense. You and your organization are utterly shameless, preying on those who for one reason or another may find themselves duped by your scam.

I'm truly sad for those who fall victim to your marketing deception. You folks truly are a piece of work. And I'm quite confident in saying that I'm likely not the first person to tell you this.

I have asked on several occasions in the past to be removed from your mailing lists. Apparently my requests have fallen on deaf ears. Let this be a final fair warning to you, your fellow employees and administrators within your organization. DO NOT contact me again in any manner. Doing so will be viewed as harassment and will result in my company providing the correspondences to our attorney for their further considerations.

XXXX-X-XXXXXXXXX

President
Kastle Archives Productions Inc.

02-18-2006, 11:02 AM	#1
SilentKnight Megan Fox's fluffer Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: shooting pool in Elysium Posts: 24,818	This audacious spam cracked me up! Dear Silent Knight, I'm sorry you will be unable to join us at the upcoming International Society of Photographers Annual Convention and Symposium, March 3-5, 2006 to be held at the famed Riviera Hotel and Casino in lase Vegas, Nevada, as it promises to be one of the most exciting and prestigious photography events ever held. As you know, you were selected to be honored at this event, and we were looking forward to you presenting your photographic artistry in front of hundreds of photographers and guests from over a dozen countries who will be attending. However, because we don't want you to miss out on this unique opportunity altogether, we have arranged a way for you and your photographic accomplishments to be a part of this event in a major way, without your actually being present. Although you will be unable to participate in the convention contest (you must be present to win), you can receive all of the awards you have earned--including your custom-engraved Outstanding Achievement in Photography Silver Award Bowl (see it here), your bronze Commemorative Award Medallion, and your Full Basic Membership into the International Society of Photographers for 2006--if you will allow us to showcase at the convention in your place. In this regard, we have arranged for your photo "Moonlight over Niagara" (see your photo here) to be presented at our convention. Your photograph, along with your name, will be presented exactly as you created it for all convention attendees to view. In this way, hundreds of attending photographers and their guests, who come from all over the world to attend the convention, will appreciate your photograph. And let me tell you a little about the actual awards and ISP membership benefits that you will receive by mail immediately after you confirm your participation in this prestigious event by allowing us to showcase your photo: -- Your Outstanding Achievement in Photography Silver Award Bowl (a $200.00 value) is a magnificent work of art in itself that measures over 10 inches across and over 11 inches high. It is handcrafted in silver and has your name custom-engraved on a beautiful cherry-wood base (see it here). It is certain to enjoy a special place of pride in your home and will serve as a fitting symbol of your unique photographic artistry. -- Your bronze Commemorative Award Medallion is a deeply etched bronze medal (a $40.00 value) brilliantly displayed on a 25-inch red, white and blue satin ribbon. -- And your Full Basic Membership into the International Society of Photographers for 2006 (a $60.00 value) entitles you to a personalized membership card, special discounts and contests, and a free subscription to our quarterly newsletter. Please note, if you are already an ISP member, your benefits will be extended an additional year. Silent Knight, all that's required for us to immediately send you all of these Awards is for you to give us permission to display your photograph, "Moonlight over Niagara". Additionally, because you will not be present, we must also ask you for the necessary funds ($169.00 plus p+h) to cover the costs of the time and effort required to present your photography before the convention attendees, and to cover the costs incurred in insuring and shipping to you these extremely bulky and heavy awards. Silent Knight, we are, of course, ultimately most interested in meeting you and having you personally present your artistry in front of the thousands of other photographers who attend these live events. Unfortunately, this is not the case at this time, so we're trying to do the next best thing. But we sincerely hope to personally present you with your most deserved awards in the future. Sincerely, Craig Foster International Society of Photographers Convention Awards Chairperson

02-18-2006, 11:30 AM	#2
SilentKnight Megan Fox's fluffer Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: shooting pool in Elysium Posts: 24,818	Normally I don't reply to spam of course, but since I'd had some dealings with these clowns in the past, I couldn't resist sending them the following the other night: ------------------- Mr. Foster, After receiving the letter from you (quoted below) - I felt compelled to reply and pass along to you a few of my thoughts about your organization and marketing tactics. You solicit photographic submissions from artists and photographers from around the world, publish their freely-donated photos in your coffeetable books, sell the books for a profit - and then have the gall to attempt charging submitting photographers for a copy of the book. As if that's not enough - now you spam me with this utter bullshit "awards convention" and make it sound as though I'm eligible for some sort of award of merit. And surprise...surprise - I only have to pay you $169 plus shipping and handling to receive this ridiculous "award". Its bad enough that you scam photographers to make a profit for your organization this way. Its even more repugnant and audacious that you insult my intelligence with this utter nonsense. You and your organization are utterly shameless, preying on those who for one reason or another may find themselves duped by your scam. I'm truly sad for those who fall victim to your marketing deception. You folks truly are a piece of work. And I'm quite confident in saying that I'm likely not the first person to tell you this. I have asked on several occasions in the past to be removed from your mailing lists. Apparently my requests have fallen on deaf ears. Let this be a final fair warning to you, your fellow employees and administrators within your organization. DO NOT contact me again in any manner. Doing so will be viewed as harassment and will result in my company providing the correspondences to our attorney for their further considerations. XXXX-X-XXXXXXXXX President Kastle Archives Productions Inc.