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Old 12-23-2005, 01:05 PM   #1
CDSmith
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Ladies, the list of #1 rules from the men's side is in

I've finally found it, the quintessential list of #1 rules from the men's side.

Here you go...


1. Men ARE not mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Please don't ask us.
1. If something we said or did can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.


I hear there is a list of #1 rules from the women's side out there as well. I hear it is quite a bit shorter though. :D
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Old 12-23-2005, 01:06 PM   #2
Spunky
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Copy and pasted..so true!
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Old 12-23-2005, 01:12 PM   #3
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so true....
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Old 12-23-2005, 01:14 PM   #4
CDSmith
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I think this list should be framed and on the wall or fridge in every home in the world.

I truly do.
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Old 12-23-2005, 01:18 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CDSmith
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
Ohhh, how I know all about this one ... it's the old "damned if you do, damned if you don't" ideology. If she drops a hint and you make a move, either you get a slap for it or you get laid.

But since women generally love the art of seduction, they will never just say it - and they have an "out" if you aren't interested ... I honestly think there should be a manual on this for men. All-time best seller:

"A Concise Guide to Women's Hints for Men"
Like an encyclopedia with photos and historical references

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