Well, we have had our ups and downs.... ALOT of them, she met me when I was very well to do and has stuck with me through some serious financial down falls. She has also helped me alot getting through some things in my past and dealt with mental abuse that she never deserved.
Years have gone by and alot of healing has occured, I am becoming very close to my 2 year old daughter now and since I am also naturally spending time with her when I spend time with my daughter I have started to feel that feeling of 'Family' and started really falling for the girl again.
I have felt like this for a couple months, and she said she has too ...
She got back from going out of town for a bit for business today and I had 100 of those little 'tea cup candles' lit up throughout the room.... all around the coffe table with a single rose and baby breath in a very nice vase all setup... Candles in a circle formation around that, it was truly a breathtaking site and god damn romantic if you ask me!
Anyways she walks down stairs, I tell her I have a suprise... She immediately says "Awwwwwwwwwwww you didn't have to do that, that's so sweet! And seemed very happy"
A Quick note on both our stances on marriage - We have both told eachother for years we don't need tog et married and it's jsut a piece of paper. Well, lately I have been feeling like it's more and mentioned here and there marriage doesn't scare me any more she wouldn't reply anything. Me being the stupid ass I was - I took that as she felt the same way but didn't want to pressure me into getting married - Anyways...
I ask her to Marry me - she is shocked, and I understand that. NOONE who knows me personally would have EVER epected me to ask anyone to marry me - seriously... it isn't the normal me.
She fumbled for words and went over the "It's just a piece of paper" - I told her repeatedly, just consider it a promise ring then.. and we don't have t get married right away, we cna wait a year or longer.. I am FAR from being in a rush myself, LOL
She eventually said "YES, of course!"
We sat their and cuddled, and talked for a bit... We had about an hour and a half till we had to go pick up our daughter... No Sex!!!!!! WTF?
OK, So we will later, right ?
We get back and spend a family night together and enjoy ourselves.. She spens time with me, I give her an incredible back massge (which most women 'she even USED to be this way') melt in your hands if you give them the right kind of back massage.... Our daughter is in bed at this time so hey the sex door is open again...
No Go ... Simply a Kiss Good Night
After she said Yes, she did not talk abotu the proposal at all again period.. except to say she didn't really liek the ring - as if the night wasn't already bad enough.. Nothing, no thanks that was so damn romantic when she went to sleep... NADA. She didn't call her friends and family... NOTHING.
What in the fuck ? I did this because i thought things were starting t go so well between us ... and truth be told this is exactly the sort of thing that has fucked up our relationship in the past many o times...
Should I just be straight up with her - tell her how I feel.. Which is she is doing it cause she felt she had to .. even though I told her when I proposed and she was in shell shock not to say yes because she felt she had to...
Fuck, I dunno ... But I picked up the god dman bottle for the first time in 2 months after hitting 3 AA meetings in less than 24 hours after this shit ...
WOMEN FUCKING SUCK
Years have gone by and alot of healing has occured, I am becoming very close to my 2 year old daughter now and since I am also naturally spending time with her when I spend time with my daughter I have started to feel that feeling of 'Family' and started really falling for the girl again.
I have felt like this for a couple months, and she said she has too ...
She got back from going out of town for a bit for business today and I had 100 of those little 'tea cup candles' lit up throughout the room.... all around the coffe table with a single rose and baby breath in a very nice vase all setup... Candles in a circle formation around that, it was truly a breathtaking site and god damn romantic if you ask me!
Anyways she walks down stairs, I tell her I have a suprise... She immediately says "Awwwwwwwwwwww you didn't have to do that, that's so sweet! And seemed very happy"
A Quick note on both our stances on marriage - We have both told eachother for years we don't need tog et married and it's jsut a piece of paper. Well, lately I have been feeling like it's more and mentioned here and there marriage doesn't scare me any more she wouldn't reply anything. Me being the stupid ass I was - I took that as she felt the same way but didn't want to pressure me into getting married - Anyways...
I ask her to Marry me - she is shocked, and I understand that. NOONE who knows me personally would have EVER epected me to ask anyone to marry me - seriously... it isn't the normal me.
She fumbled for words and went over the "It's just a piece of paper" - I told her repeatedly, just consider it a promise ring then.. and we don't have t get married right away, we cna wait a year or longer.. I am FAR from being in a rush myself, LOL
She eventually said "YES, of course!"
We sat their and cuddled, and talked for a bit... We had about an hour and a half till we had to go pick up our daughter... No Sex!!!!!! WTF?
OK, So we will later, right ?
We get back and spend a family night together and enjoy ourselves.. She spens time with me, I give her an incredible back massge (which most women 'she even USED to be this way') melt in your hands if you give them the right kind of back massage.... Our daughter is in bed at this time so hey the sex door is open again...
No Go ... Simply a Kiss Good Night
After she said Yes, she did not talk abotu the proposal at all again period.. except to say she didn't really liek the ring - as if the night wasn't already bad enough.. Nothing, no thanks that was so damn romantic when she went to sleep... NADA. She didn't call her friends and family... NOTHING.
What in the fuck ? I did this because i thought things were starting t go so well between us ... and truth be told this is exactly the sort of thing that has fucked up our relationship in the past many o times...
Should I just be straight up with her - tell her how I feel.. Which is she is doing it cause she felt she had to .. even though I told her when I proposed and she was in shell shock not to say yes because she felt she had to...
Fuck, I dunno ... But I picked up the god dman bottle for the first time in 2 months after hitting 3 AA meetings in less than 24 hours after this shit ...
WOMEN FUCKING SUCK
If we want to start an AA thread - I'll gladly post there otherwise that REALLY is not why I posted what I did, seriously.. I have help lined up all over nowadays - was my choice not to take it!
maybe you can try some related reading to help you out at home when the urge hits - there's a book called children of trauma that really helped me years ago.
Sell Patches & Pills 
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