ATM Procedures - GoFuckYourself.com

Ice · 10-18-2005, 04:50 PM

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed

Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required distance to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

ronaldo · 10-18-2005, 04:54 PM

I see someone's been stalking my wife.

iBanker · 10-18-2005, 05:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by iceicebaby

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

Best part.

Sony · 10-18-2005, 05:05 PM

hahah , funny stuff

BRISK · 10-18-2005, 05:07 PM

It's so true!

K R I S T E N · 10-18-2005, 05:13 PM

lol - that is funny ice!

Sosa · 10-18-2005, 05:15 PM

haha nice

Aly · 10-18-2005, 05:34 PM

kinda true i'm afraid!

Tylo · 10-18-2005, 06:52 PM

hahah

good shit bro!!

WiredGuy · 10-18-2005, 06:58 PM

haha, alot of this is so true!
WG

Ycaza · 10-18-2005, 07:11 PM

thats fuckin funny

10-18-2005, 04:50 PM	#1
Ice Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Sunny California Posts: 26,053	ATM Procedures After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender." MALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to the cash machine. 2. Put down your car window. 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw. 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt. 6. Put window up. 7. Drive off. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ FEMALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required distance to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card. 5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up 6. Attempt to insert card into machine. 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car. 8. Insert card. 9. Re-insert card the right way. 10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page. 11. Enter PIN. 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN. 13. Enter amount of cash required. 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror. 15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside. 17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook. 18. Re-check makeup. 19. Drive forward 2 feet. 20. Reverse back to cash machine. 21. Retrieve card. 22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided. 23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you. 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off. 25. Redial person on cell phone 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles. 27. Release Parking Brake. __________________ icq 1904905

10-18-2005, 05:07 PM	#5
BRISK Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 12,240	It's so true! __________________ I post on GFY so that when people ask me what I do, I can tell them that I work with the mentally retarded.

10-18-2005, 05:34 PM	#8
Aly President, ePufferProfits Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Toronto, Canada Posts: 1,881	kinda true i'm afraid! __________________ . . Aly's ICQ: 51504163 . Aly's Email: [email protected]

10-18-2005, 06:52 PM	#9
Tylo Confirmed User Join Date: May 2002 Location: South FL. Posts: 2,108	hahah good shit bro!! __________________ -ICQ# 119419008

10-18-2005, 06:58 PM	#10
WiredGuy Pounding Googlebot Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 34,482	haha, alot of this is so true! WG __________________ I play with Google.

10-18-2005, 04:54 PM	#2
ronaldo Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: ICQ#: 272000271 Posts: 5,475	I see someone's been stalking my wife.

10-18-2005, 05:05 PM	#4
Sony Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Posts: 495	hahah , funny stuff

10-18-2005, 05:13 PM	#6
K R I S T E N Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 2,438	lol - that is funny ice!

10-18-2005, 05:15 PM	#7
Sosa In Tushy Land Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Nebraska Posts: 40,149	haha nice

10-18-2005, 07:11 PM	#11
Ycaza Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: the 805 Posts: 4,290	thats fuckin funny __________________ Caz Thrush Head Honcho [email protected] http://thrushtech.com ICQ: 304883574 do people still icq?