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Old 09-29-2005, 06:40 AM   #1
poppet
Just call me Tala! :)
 
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For those into BDSM....

Get up on the wrong side of the rack this morning? A little miffed after that 12 hour bondage scene yesterday? Not getting enough of the whip? Perhaps you are just feeling kinda SAMmy? These are the top ten ways to really show your dom/me how you feel:

10. For those of you with FemDommes... take out your toolbox, grab a hacksaw, and cut the heels off of her pretty, new thigh-high boots.

9. Grab the Super-Glue and glue the tips of all his nipple clamps together.

8. Practice your knot tying with his bondage ropes... make sure you leave the knots in before you slip them back in the toybox.

7. In the middle of that morning spanking, start painting your fingernails.

6. After the fingernails are done, sweetly say "Are you going to be finished soon? I can't get to my toes in this position."

5. While you are waiting for him to finish spanking, tie his shoelaces together.

4. Is he rushing to meet a deadline at work? Perfect! Call every 15 minutes with questions like "How many sugars should I put in my coffee?" and "Do you know what time and channel 'Oprah' comes on?" Make sure if his secretary or a colleague answers that you ask to speak to "Master Bill".

3. Call his wife/girlfriend/mother and say "I just tested positive for the clap. I think you should have Master Bill go to the free clinic."

2. Take out that nail polish and decorate all his toys with pink polka-dots.

And the Number 1 way to let your dom/me know you are *not* a happy little sub...
The next time you go to a play party or BDSM club meeting, slap a "Kick me: I am really just a submissive in disguise!!" sign on his back!
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Old 09-29-2005, 07:41 AM   #2
Tex Willer
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Old 09-29-2005, 07:44 AM   #3
poppet
Just call me Tala! :)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tex Willer
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SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.
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Old 09-29-2005, 07:50 AM   #4
Adult Site Traffic
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You failed to make me laugh.
.
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ALL Domains and Websites are GOING AWAY NOW! Ask me!
Many great domains, mainstream and adult, some complete sites with databases, some names with traffic and PR, some investment quality names. Come take a look! { Traffic Orders: Please go here }

.:: SHARPEN the Elite - BURN the leftovers! Ooh-Rah!! ::.
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Old 09-29-2005, 07:54 AM   #5
poppet
Just call me Tala! :)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Adult Site Traffic
You failed to make me laugh.
.
Damn. Next time I'll try harder. Honest.
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SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.
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Old 09-29-2005, 08:01 AM   #6
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Old 09-29-2005, 08:08 AM   #7
digifan
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The pink polka-dots were so funny
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Webair Rocks
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Old 09-29-2005, 08:10 AM   #8
poppet
Just call me Tala! :)
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: TECHIEMEDIA - the only host you'll ever need! (Did I mention that their techs ROCK?? Ask me about them.)
Posts: 1,499
Y'all are lucky I didn't post the long version. Guess you have to be in the lifestyle to understand why these are funny.
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SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.
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Old 10-05-2005, 10:12 AM   #9
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LOL

Magnificent!!
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