Suicide isn't so bad, give it a chance. - GoFuckYourself.com

luv$ · 09-25-2005, 02:40 PM

Thinking about suicide but you're not sure if it's the right thing to do? Here are some tips to help you decide whether or not killing yourself is a good choice:

1. Do you live at home but your parents are always making you clean your room and do your homework? It's a sure sign that they don't love you and that they want you to kill yourself. Why else would they make you clean your room? What are they going to do next, ground you? Make you wear braces? Don't kid yourself, the message is clear.

2. If you just got out of a bad relationship and you feel like things are never going to get better; you're right. Everyone knows that suicide is the only option, stop procrastinating. Look on the bright side, at least your ex will feel guilty for a couple of minutes--but don't count on it.

3. Depressed? Don't have any friends? I guess nobody told you, but being depressed and feeling lonely isn't normal. Everyone else is happy, and has lots of friends so there must be something wrong with you. Put the prozac away, what you need is rat poison.

4. Spill a drink at a party? Drop a plate of food in a restaurant? Nobody else has to live with that kind of embarrassment; you know what you have to do.

5. Flunked out of college? Don't know algebra? Here's a question you should know the answer to: Flunked out of college + Don't know algebra = Time for _____. Chances are you still don't know the answer, so here's a hint: it starts with an 's' and ends in 'uicide'.

6. Traffic jam? Sometimes bad luck isn't a coincidence. Do you really want to sit in traffic for another half hour? Look on the bright side, if you're a viking you'll be going to Valhalla. Then again, you're probably not, but eternal damnation in hell is probably the next best thing.

7. Telemarketers keep calling? It's easier to hang yourself than to get rid of a telemarketer, am I wrong? If you're lucky, Home Depot might be having a sale on rope. After all, you don't want to die letting people think you weren't frugal.

8. Flu? You realize that there's no cure for the flu, right? Well, no cure that doesn't involve painting the wall with your brains.

9. Flat tire? Do I have to spell it out for you?

10. College application get rejected? Take the hint.

Hope you found this guide helpful, mention it in your suicide note. On second thought, why bother? Nobody will read it.

mrthumbs · 09-25-2005, 02:42 PM

see sig . ...

Doctor Dre · 09-25-2005, 02:45 PM

Was 0 % funny

Manowar · 09-25-2005, 02:46 PM

not that funny

CaptainHowdy · 09-25-2005, 02:50 PM

Why are you still alive??...

JuiceMonkey · 09-25-2005, 02:51 PM

only YOU can prevent suicide

tranza · 09-25-2005, 02:59 PM

hey dude, suicide isn't so bad

je_rome · 09-25-2005, 11:34 PM

its non sense believing in suicide if you will not do it.

09-25-2005, 02:40 PM	#1
luv$ !$!$!$!$!$!$!$!$!$!$ Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Paper Street Posts: 6,158	Suicide isn't so bad, give it a chance. Thinking about suicide but you're not sure if it's the right thing to do? Here are some tips to help you decide whether or not killing yourself is a good choice: 1. Do you live at home but your parents are always making you clean your room and do your homework? It's a sure sign that they don't love you and that they want you to kill yourself. Why else would they make you clean your room? What are they going to do next, ground you? Make you wear braces? Don't kid yourself, the message is clear. 2. If you just got out of a bad relationship and you feel like things are never going to get better; you're right. Everyone knows that suicide is the only option, stop procrastinating. Look on the bright side, at least your ex will feel guilty for a couple of minutes--but don't count on it. 3. Depressed? Don't have any friends? I guess nobody told you, but being depressed and feeling lonely isn't normal. Everyone else is happy, and has lots of friends so there must be something wrong with you. Put the prozac away, what you need is rat poison. 4. Spill a drink at a party? Drop a plate of food in a restaurant? Nobody else has to live with that kind of embarrassment; you know what you have to do. 5. Flunked out of college? Don't know algebra? Here's a question you should know the answer to: Flunked out of college + Don't know algebra = Time for _____. Chances are you still don't know the answer, so here's a hint: it starts with an 's' and ends in 'uicide'. 6. Traffic jam? Sometimes bad luck isn't a coincidence. Do you really want to sit in traffic for another half hour? Look on the bright side, if you're a viking you'll be going to Valhalla. Then again, you're probably not, but eternal damnation in hell is probably the next best thing. 7. Telemarketers keep calling? It's easier to hang yourself than to get rid of a telemarketer, am I wrong? If you're lucky, Home Depot might be having a sale on rope. After all, you don't want to die letting people think you weren't frugal. 8. Flu? You realize that there's no cure for the flu, right? Well, no cure that doesn't involve painting the wall with your brains. 9. Flat tire? Do I have to spell it out for you? 10. College application get rejected? Take the hint. Hope you found this guide helpful, mention it in your suicide note. On second thought, why bother? Nobody will read it. __________________ Domain Auction - now till 12:01AM on the 2nd... Paper Streeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet Cash The Real Workout - Innocent High - Oye Loca - Her Freshman Year - Solo Interviews - This Girl Sucks. ** HQ Fresh ORIGINAL sites.

09-25-2005, 02:50 PM	#5
CaptainHowdy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Happy in the dark. Posts: 93,834	Why are you still alive??... __________________ Vacares - Web Hosting, Domains, O365, Security & More - Paxum and BTC Accepted Windows VPS now available Great for TSS, Nifty Stats, remote work, virtual assistants, etc.

09-25-2005, 02:51 PM	#6
JuiceMonkey Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Brisbane/Vancouver/SanFran Posts: 3,581	only YOU can prevent suicide __________________ ICQ: 72251955 GTalk: JuiceMonkey

09-25-2005, 02:59 PM	#7
tranza ICQ: 197-556-237 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: BRASIL !!! Posts: 57,559	hey dude, suicide isn't so bad __________________ I'm just a newbie.

09-25-2005, 11:34 PM	#8
je_rome Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 6,846	its non sense believing in suicide if you will not do it. __________________ Make money on any traffic. Join KlikRevenue.com Today!

09-25-2005, 02:42 PM	#2
mrthumbs salad tossing sig guy Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: mrthumbs*gmail.com Posts: 11,702	see sig . ...

09-25-2005, 02:46 PM	#4
Manowar jellyfish Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 71,528	not that funny