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#1

Serious Topic, Should I marry my African girlfriend?

09-24-2005, 03:52 PM

I have fallen in love with an african girl, we have been seeing each other for a year this october and we are living together very happily.

The problem is she is on a working visa that expires in April of 2006 and it can't be extended.. Between us we can't figure out any other way for us to stay together unless I go to Africa which I don't want to do..

So what should I do? Marry her or not? My main reason for doubt is the shit I would get from my family, do I just ignore them and do it anyway..?

Come on GFY I need your advice..
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#2

09-24-2005, 03:55 PM

if you come here to ask for an advise you are fucked in the head LOL
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nexcom28

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#3

09-24-2005, 03:57 PM

Well I will do my own thing anyway, but I would be interested to know what people think..
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#4

09-24-2005, 04:02 PM

Originally posted by nexcom28

Well I will do my own thing anyway, but I would be interested to know what people think..

listen to your family, but always do your own thing
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#5

09-24-2005, 04:08 PM

marry her, who cares what color she is, if your family cant accept that, and they dont want u happy, but she makes you happy, what do u think the right choice is smart guy

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#6

09-24-2005, 04:10 PM

btw if u marry her before her visa expires, then u have nothing to worry about she can stay in the states

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#7

09-24-2005, 04:13 PM

well, I wouldnt be surprised that she only wants you to be able to stay in the country

ALL african girls do this all the time

and yes she in her quest for a permanent visa thing will go FAR

being with you for over a year does not mean she is genuine

odds are she is just doing this for a permit , I myself know many of these girls , and trust me they are all the same, all they care about is THEMSELVES

and getting themselves MONEY and a PERMANENT VISA , they do anything to make you believe they are genuine

make it look like you want to move to Africa with her so you can both live there without problem , do this for couple of weeks and see how she reacts

my bet would be she would not want this

if this is the case , DUMP THE BITCH

this is not a FAKE NICK
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#8

09-24-2005, 04:15 PM

Originally posted by andrej_NDC

listen to your family, but always do your own thing

This is kind of what I had said anyway.. I will decide for myself althoughif I listened to my family, trhey would be like ' you what, you fuckin crazy.. she just wants a visa... blah blah blah..
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#9

09-24-2005, 04:16 PM

Originally posted by nexcom28

This is kind of what I had said anyway.. I will decide for myself althoughif I listened to my family, trhey would be like ' you what, you fuckin crazy.. she just wants a visa... blah blah blah..

fact is this most likely is the case ,

they do this all the time , playing all genuine , they A LOT of trouble to make you believe they really care about you and dont just want the permit

this is not a FAKE NICK
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#10

09-24-2005, 04:18 PM

Originally posted by Ray Nagin

well, I wouldnt be surprised that she only wants you to be able to stay in the country

ALL african girls do this all the time

and yes she in her quest for a permanent visa thing will go FAR

being with you for over a year does not mean she is genuine

odds are she is just doing this for a permit , I myself know many of these girls , and trust me they are all the same, all they care about is THEMSELVES

and getting themselves MONEY and a PERMANENT VISA , they do anything to make you believe they are genuine

make it look like you want to move to Africa with her so you can both live there without problem , do this for couple of weeks and see how she reacts

my bet would be she would not want this

if this is the case , DUMP THE BITCH

This is good advice, thanks.. although I find it difficult to believe that she is only with me because she wants a permanent visa.. we share great times together. The fact is the law sucks..
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#11

09-24-2005, 04:24 PM

Another thing you should know, i've been to her house in Africa, i've met her family and it's pretty shit but the people their seem to love it..

If I was her I wouldn't want to go back either, at least here she has a great job and she's at college trying to better herself further.
Come April, everything could be taken away from her (and from me..)
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#12

09-24-2005, 04:24 PM

dont marry her.... she can live her in the US...illegally with an expired visa..just as long as she doesnt leave the country...cuz when she comes back shell be caught...

while shes here can choose to date her ...or break up with her...either way she has the option of finding another american to marry....and shes not shit outta luck..

as for finding her work.....she can work in some restaurants..as a hostess or waiting tables..after getting hired...just say that she forgot her SS cards at home...eventually they stop askingl...as some managment is irresponsible....

my present girlfriend is brazilian..and thats how she remains here in the US
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#13

09-24-2005, 04:33 PM

Originally posted by Joe Mac "Icey Porn"

dont marry her.... she can live her in the US...illegally with an expired visa..just as long as she doesnt leave the country...cuz when she comes back shell be caught...

while shes here can choose to date her ...or break up with her...either way she has the option of finding another american to marry....and shes not shit outta luck..

as for finding her work.....she can work in some restaurants..as a hostess or waiting tables..after getting hired...just say that she forgot her SS cards at home...eventually they stop askingl...as some managment is irresponsible....

my present girlfriend is brazilian..and thats how she remains here in the US

Sorry for the misunderstanding but we don't live in the US..
Also, She already works. In fact she works fucking hard looking after a mentally disabled woman who the government won't help.

And living here illegaly is a really bad idea, if she gets caught. This could be for any minor incident, speending fine for instance would mean instant deportation and a 5 year ban on returning..
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#14

09-24-2005, 04:36 PM

if you love her and she loves you....let's do it!
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#15

09-24-2005, 04:36 PM

If you REALLY love her, mary here. Just be wise, and have a contract made up, that when you divorce, she won't get all your stuff...This will also make your family happy...

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#16

09-24-2005, 04:44 PM

EDUCATION VISA!!!! find a cheap, cheap school, sign her up fast for a couple semesers, just to get an educational visa.. they cant deny visa's for educational purposes, i dont think.. i now nothing of these sort of things, but maybe something like this is workable.. look into it,, by the way, what country are you in.. as far as marriage, that's up to you.. only you know if you're ready for the lifetime commitment,, the answer is in your heart.. do what your heart tells you. think of few simple things..
Is this woman your best friend? she has to be if your thinking marriage, it wont work if she isnt.
Can you share every thought, feelings or secrets with her? if some topics, things you feel uncomfortable talking to her about, chances are the marriage will fail.. the key to a successful marriage is COMMUNICATION!!!
Do you want to grow old with her? if not, dont waste your time on marriage

what if after, things dont work out, now she's a citizen, & your hearts broken, but annulments/divorces can be messy & expensive.

as far as family thoughts on her race/color whatever, it is YOUR decision & your family MUST accept it. Tell them how you fell.. spill your fucking guts, they're your family, they will adjust. they have to.

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#17

09-24-2005, 04:47 PM

I hope to god you got her tested or have been jimmyin' up.... the percentage of people with AIDS overthere aren't anything to fuck with.... You'd have better luck with the lottery.

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#18

09-24-2005, 04:55 PM

Originally posted by split_joel

marry her, who cares what color she is,

I believe he said, "African" and didn't actually indicate what "color" she is.

Not that it matters.

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#19

09-24-2005, 04:58 PM

If you feel so deeply in love with her ..go for it

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#20

09-24-2005, 05:01 PM

if you really love her, and you get along great, marry her. your family doesn't have to live with her, and the rest you can probably work out.

lucky for me, my fiance never thought twice when his family said if he stayed hooked up with me, they would not speak to him again.

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#21

09-24-2005, 05:04 PM

Originally posted by Alleged Indecent Exposure

I believe he said, "African" and didn't actually indicate what "color" she is.

Not that it matters.

Now how many colors do you think africans come in?
black, brown, dark brown, light brown, caramel.

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#22

09-24-2005, 05:06 PM

I wouldn't goto africa that is for sure
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#23

09-24-2005, 05:08 PM

Originally posted by Sosa

I wouldn't goto africa that is for sure

there's some very awesome stuff in africa. the jungles, the animals, the indigenous culture. it's very pretty there in many many parts of it.. most people when they hear AFRICA, they think of the sally struthers on tv in ethiopia.. but many parts are more civilized & have decent infrastructure.. but africa should be onones vacation list if your into nature & wildlife & culture

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#24

09-24-2005, 05:15 PM

Originally posted by nexcom28

If I was her I wouldn't want to go back either, at least here she has a great job and she's at college trying to better herself further.

Better herself further?

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#25

09-24-2005, 05:16 PM

girls will do anything for a green card.
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#26

09-24-2005, 05:17 PM

Originally posted by basschick

if you really love her, and you get along great, marry her. your family doesn't have to live with her, and the rest you can probably work out.

Stop thinking SMALL... he's going to "fix" her.

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#27

09-24-2005, 05:22 PM

Originally posted by Sosa

I wouldn't goto africa that is for sure

I wouldn't go to Oakland... what's your point?

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#28

09-24-2005, 06:23 PM

Originally posted by bdld

girls will do anything for a green card.

BINGO! have her pay you 20k for a retainer!

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#29

09-24-2005, 06:26 PM

Your family might surprise you. My sister married a cambodian, and he was taken in like one of the (white southern fundamentalist) family. Even after they divorced, my parents still treat him like a son.

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#30

09-24-2005, 06:53 PM

Listen to what your family has to say but in the end its up to you, if you love her and dont want her to leave then yes marry her.

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#31

09-24-2005, 06:55 PM

Originally posted by Doomed

if you come here to ask for an advise you are fucked in the head LOL
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#32

09-24-2005, 07:31 PM

Originally posted by BeatingSkull

Now how many colors do you think africans come in?
black, brown, dark brown, light brown, caramel.

I know you are joking. I still don't think it is funny.

Try visiting other countries and see what is out there!

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#33

09-24-2005, 07:57 PM

I definitely think that marrying someone for a green card will be the smartest decision you will ever make.

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#34

09-24-2005, 08:05 PM

holly lol that was beautiful

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#35

09-24-2005, 08:10 PM

Originally posted by Walley

holly lol that was beautiful

I was gonna say she's probably a tranny and can't get married anyway, but I thought that might be too mean. I'm glad you liked the one I went with.

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#36

09-24-2005, 08:28 PM

Originally posted by Doomed

if you come here to ask for an advise you are fucked in the head LOL

what he said
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#37

09-25-2005, 12:44 AM

Originally posted by BeatingSkull

Now how many colors do you think africans come in?
black, brown, dark brown, light brown, caramel.

she's African ^^^^
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#38

09-25-2005, 12:52 AM

Originally posted by justsexxx

If you REALLY love her, mary here. Just be wise, and have a contract made up, that when you divorce, she won't get all your stuff...This will also make your family happy...

and do that even fi you marry someone from your country,someone you have known forever. A rule to live an die for
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#39

09-25-2005, 01:22 AM

Originally posted by nexcom28

So what should I do? Marry her or not?

Marry her!

Originally posted by BeatingSkull

Now how many colors do you think africans come in?
black, brown, dark brown, light brown, caramel.

You forgot: White, pink, reddish white, bronze, tourist red, and my fav: pitch black

meh
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#40

09-25-2005, 01:56 AM

Get your ass to Ethiopia, you cracker mofucka.

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#41

09-25-2005, 02:14 AM

Originally posted by Antonio

she's African ^^^^

She was born in South Africa.
He parents are both 100% white.
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#42

09-25-2005, 02:17 AM

anyway, back to the topic: marry her and you will fuck your life up.
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#43

09-25-2005, 02:21 AM

You sound far too young to get married.

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#44

09-25-2005, 06:48 AM

Originally posted by you are dumb

She was born in South Africa.
He parents are both 100% white.

You can't be dumber than dirt can you?

The point of the post is that she is African you dumb sack of infected testicles.

See, she is African.

Get it? dummy.

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#45

09-25-2005, 06:58 AM

Originally posted by Alleged Indecent Exposure

You can't be dumber than dirt can you?

The point of the post is that she is African you dumb sack of infected testicles.

See, she is African.

Get it? dummy.

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#46

09-25-2005, 07:17 AM

Originally posted by andrej_NDC

listen to your family, but always do your own thing

Very nicely said
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#47

09-25-2005, 07:56 AM

you`re so disrespectful for yourself that you`ve even imported HIV-infested

bitch from fucking jungle ??? thats patetic
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#48

09-25-2005, 08:48 AM

when there's a greencard involved there's always a possibility that the relationship may not be genuine then again, always a possibility that it may very well be genuine and you maybe letting a good thing slip away. it's a tight spot. just about anytime you date a non-immigrant (black, white, brown or purple) this will be an issue. I know a few very successful marriages came out of this kinda situtation then i know a lot of horror stories as well. trust your heart, if it says that it really believes BEYOND ANY DOUBT (ie. if your one sided love hasn't completely blinded you hehe) that your partner REALLY loves you then go for it but if there's any doubt whatsoever then don't.

Also, H1 visas can be extended atleast once and also, company who gets her a H1 visa normally sponsors her for a greencard too.. why is that being different for your g/f? If she got a greencard on her own and still held on to you then there'd be no doubt at all about her intentions.

Don't worry about what parents say cos your parents won't be marrying her you will. besides parents can be pretty ignorant sometime too. reminds me my aunt told me when I was marrying my g/f who's an Itallian descend "born & raised" here that she thought my g/f was marrying me for a greencard. LOL.

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#49

09-25-2005, 09:04 AM

If you love her, marry her ... that's it that's all . If you wanna do the rest of your life with her.

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#50

09-25-2005, 09:26 AM

Originally posted by nexcom28

I have fallen in love with an african girl, we have been seeing each other for a year this october and we are living together very happily.

The problem is she is on a working visa that expires in April of 2006 and it can't be extended.. Between us we can't figure out any other way for us to stay together unless I go to Africa which I don't want to do..

So what should I do? Marry her or not? My main reason for doubt is the shit I would get from my family, do I just ignore them and do it anyway..?

Come on GFY I need your advice..

the real question you need to ask yourself is "is this the right reason to marry her'

the answer is obviously "no"

and if you have some concern like "she's black and i dont know what would my parents think" --- then you have even more growing up to do.
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