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Old 09-13-2005, 10:20 PM   #1
MetroPornTour
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I helped a friend clean her closet & now understand France

My lord God!

I have never seen sooo much paper work in my entire life. Major corporations have less then a common every day person in France.

My friend is a normal every day person that works a regular job in a resturant. There is nothing special about her home, car, job, etc.

But from a North American standard the amount of paperwork she has to deal with is unreal.

Attestations for work.
Attestations for home.
Apartment tax papers.
Social Security papers for visiting a doctor.
Tax returns.
Pay papers. (Not stubs-entire forms certifying she was paid -each week!)
Insurance papers for her car.
Attestations that she owns a car.
Photocopied info of her parents & their marital status when she was born.
etc etc etc

Literally boxes of the stuff going back 5 years. All of it is required for one reason or another. And several years mandated by goverment law.

So my husband came up with a new joke based on this finding. (Sorry kind of a spin on an old French slam)

How many Frenchmen does it take to defend France?
A.
It will never be done because they don't want to have to fill out and obtain a "Victory Attestation" later.
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Old 09-13-2005, 10:23 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetroPornTour
So my husband came up with a new joke based on this finding. (Sorry kind of a spin on an old French slam)

How many Frenchmen does it take to defend France?
A.
It will never be done because they don't want to have to fill out and obtain a "Victory Attestation" later.

Your husband should do stand up comedy! Oh my
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Old 09-13-2005, 10:25 PM   #3
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Hahahaha! Sounds like quite a bit of paperwork! Has your husband ever considered a career in standup?
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Old 09-13-2005, 11:31 PM   #4
MetroPornTour
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He came up with another one.

Why do French women Not shave under their arms?

A. Because French goverment requires razor blade manufacturers to certify their product is safe for armpits. Before French medical care will cover the cost of accidental armpit nicks.

Why do French women always wear thongs?

A. Less paperwork to fill out at the cash register.

Why isn't Wallmart in France?

A. Because normal Wallmart customers don't enjoy having to explain their purchases.
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Old 09-13-2005, 11:43 PM   #5
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This is the first time I heard about that, makes me think that France is a country only for vacation. Not a good idea to live there.
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Old 09-14-2005, 12:29 AM   #6
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And he came up with more.

What is the difference between an Elephant and French Paper-work?

A. An elephant can get by with only 1 trunk!

How do you make a Frenchman panic?

A. Give him a form to fill out with a pen that doesn't work.

If you are trying to avoid French bureaucracy what should you never ask a Frenchmen?

A. His name.
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Old 09-14-2005, 01:24 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetroPornTour

Why isn't Wallmart in France?

A. Because normal Wallmart customers don't enjoy having to explain their purchases.
or can barely sign their name
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Old 09-14-2005, 01:26 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetroPornTour
And he came up with more.

What is the difference between an Elephant and French Paper-work?

A. An elephant can get by with only 1 trunk!

How do you make a Frenchman panic?

A. Give him a form to fill out with a pen that doesn't work.

If you are trying to avoid French bureaucracy what should you never ask a Frenchmen?

A. His name.
That will definitely trigger my fire raising side
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Old 09-14-2005, 02:10 AM   #9
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All jokes aside.

When you live in other countries, not of your own. It really makes you pause for a moment and respect all the wonderful things about where you came from. And it is always the little things that you miss the most.

For me, it has been being able get Kraft Dinner, Mr.Noodles, the ability to speak French with a dialect other than Parisian, and I also miss GT-Snow racers and Hot chocolate after a snowball fight. (Yes I'm an adult and still do these things.)

But most of all I miss the liberal sexual attitudes of North America.
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Last edited by MetroPornTour; 09-14-2005 at 02:11 AM..
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Old 09-14-2005, 04:58 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetroPornTour
But most of all I miss the liberal sexual attitudes of North America.
Now you have to be kidding me! Maybe France is different from the rest of Europe but the one thing I like most about living outside of the USA and in Europe is just how open people in Europe are about sex. I mean, turn on the tv in Belgium, for example, and see hardcore anal sex at night and not even on cable and lets not even mention Holland.


I miss Kraft mac and cheese now and then too though I can find it in some supermarkets if I look hard enough.
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Old 09-14-2005, 06:27 AM   #11
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Now you have to be kidding me! Maybe France is different from the rest of Europe but the one thing I like most about living outside of the USA and in Europe is just how open people in Europe are about sex. I mean, turn on the tv in Belgium, for example, and see hardcore anal sex at night and not even on cable and lets not even mention Holland.


I miss Kraft mac and cheese now and then too though I can find it in some supermarkets if I look hard enough.
When you think of Europe. France is really the exception to most rules and behaviours. Some of my husband's family is in Palermo and we have a small place there and we have also lived Barcelona. And yes, you are very correct about the liberal sexual attitudes.

But the French are very conservative. Sure they have exchangist clubs and sex show clubs. But for the most part, you will find the people tend to be prudish. And in most company, no one wants to discuss it or admit to anything.

Trust me I'm in the heart of French porn and it is a virtual nightmare to film anything. For each girl that will do everything there are 20 with a list of tabous the length of my arm. Los Angeles is sooo much easier and less headaches.

As for the kraft dinner. It just isn't available here at all. I have to have friends from home mail it to me.
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