Why the Iraqi chicken crossed to road... - GoFuckYourself.com

erehwon · 06-17-2005, 08:28 PM

Why the Iraqi chicken crossed to road...

Coalition Provisional Authority (CPA):
The fact that the Iraqi chicken crossed the road affirmatively demonstrates
that decision-making authority has been transferred to the chicken well in
advance of the scheduled June 30th transition of power. From now on, the chicken is responsible for its own decisions.

Halliburton Corporation:
We were asked to help the chicken cross the road. Given the inherent risk of
road crossing and the rarity of chickens, this operation will only cost the
US government $326,004.

Muqtada al-Sadr:
The chicken was a tool of the evil Coalition and will be killed.

US Army Military Police:
We were directed to prepare the chicken to cross the road. As part of these
preparations, individual soldiers ran over the chicken repeatedly and then
plucked the chicken. We deeply regret the occurrence of any chicken rights
violations.

1st Cav:
The chicken was not authorized to cross the road without displaying two
forms of picture identification. Thus, the chicken was appropriately
detained and searched in accordance with current SOP's.

We apologize for any embarrassment to the chicken. As a result of this unfortunate incident, the command has instituted a gender sensitivity training program and all future chicken searches will be conducted by female soldiers.

Al Jazeera:
The chicken was forced to cross the road multiple times at gunpoint by a
large group of occupation soldiers, according to eye-witnesses. The chicken
was then fired upon intentionally, in yet another example of the abuse of
innocent Iraqi chickens.

Blackwater Contracting Corporation:
We cannot confirm any involvement in the chicken-road-crossing incident.

Translators:
Chicken he cross street because bad she tangle regulation. Future chicken
table against my request.

U.S. Marine Corps:
The chicken is dead.

Matt 26z · 06-17-2005, 08:36 PM

American Citizens:
Thanks to GWB, that chicken will not have the opportunity to bring terrorism to our homeland.

erehwon · 06-18-2005, 01:13 AM

A bump of levity for the overnight GFY'ers!

kernelpanic · 06-18-2005, 01:15 AM

darnit · 06-18-2005, 01:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matt 26z

American Citizens:
Thanks to GWB, that chicken will not have the opportunity to bring terrorism to our homeland.

EDIT - realised you were being sarcasitc.. nevermind.

CrazyNakedChick · 06-18-2005, 04:30 AM

Hahahah, thanks for posting. Made my morning.

06-17-2005, 08:28 PM	#1
erehwon Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: A secure undisclosed location... Posts: 3,759	Why the Iraqi chicken crossed to road... Why the Iraqi chicken crossed to road... Coalition Provisional Authority (CPA): The fact that the Iraqi chicken crossed the road affirmatively demonstrates that decision-making authority has been transferred to the chicken well in advance of the scheduled June 30th transition of power. From now on, the chicken is responsible for its own decisions. Halliburton Corporation: We were asked to help the chicken cross the road. Given the inherent risk of road crossing and the rarity of chickens, this operation will only cost the US government $326,004. Muqtada al-Sadr: The chicken was a tool of the evil Coalition and will be killed. US Army Military Police: We were directed to prepare the chicken to cross the road. As part of these preparations, individual soldiers ran over the chicken repeatedly and then plucked the chicken. We deeply regret the occurrence of any chicken rights violations. 1st Cav: The chicken was not authorized to cross the road without displaying two forms of picture identification. Thus, the chicken was appropriately detained and searched in accordance with current SOP's. We apologize for any embarrassment to the chicken. As a result of this unfortunate incident, the command has instituted a gender sensitivity training program and all future chicken searches will be conducted by female soldiers. Al Jazeera: The chicken was forced to cross the road multiple times at gunpoint by a large group of occupation soldiers, according to eye-witnesses. The chicken was then fired upon intentionally, in yet another example of the abuse of innocent Iraqi chickens. Blackwater Contracting Corporation: We cannot confirm any involvement in the chicken-road-crossing incident. Translators: Chicken he cross street because bad she tangle regulation. Future chicken table against my request. U.S. Marine Corps: The chicken is dead. __________________ Money NEVER $leep$...

06-18-2005, 01:13 AM	#3
erehwon Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: A secure undisclosed location... Posts: 3,759	A bump of levity for the overnight GFY'ers! __________________ Money NEVER $leep$...

06-18-2005, 01:15 AM	#4
kernelpanic Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 2,961	__________________ ZangoCash - Turn Your Traffic Into Ca$h. $.40 Per Install - No Tier

06-18-2005, 04:30 AM	#6
CrazyNakedChick Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Infidelville Posts: 1,902	Hahahah, thanks for posting. Made my morning. __________________ Addicted to Lingerie? Got Broadband? Click Here!

06-17-2005, 08:36 PM	#2
Matt 26z So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: ¤ª"˜¨๑۩۞۩๑¨˜"ª¤ Posts: 18,481	American Citizens: Thanks to GWB, that chicken will not have the opportunity to bring terrorism to our homeland.