Don't you hate it when... - GoFuckYourself.com

Tala · 05-09-2005, 01:04 PM

Sorry, this is much like Loryn's post, but I thought I'd share. It came from a bit I did a long time ago in college, so here goes.

Don't You Hate It When....

Here are some little things that we all share, collected by me to provide some semi-quality entertainment.

Don't you hate it when..

Some dingdong asks if it's hot enough for you? What, ninety degrees in the shade and you're asking if I want it hotter? Buggar off.

You can't find your glasses and they're on top of your head, and you only discover this because your kids are laughing at you.

You're having to have a screaming conversation with someone at an industry gathering, (or any gathering), in order to be heard over the music, then the music abruptly pauses right when you're saying something along the lines of, "Yeah, had to get an elephant-sized dildo!" Suddenly you're the life of the party. Cheers.

You meet the man of your dreams and everything is going deliciously well when your husband calls. (This also works the opposite way for the men.)

Some nitwit says, "Hey, can I ask ya something?" Guess what, sparky, you just did. Game over.

You're going down a flight of stairs and think there's an extra step there but there's not? Suddenly you seem to be three inches shorter. This also counts for going up the stairs, except you just end up looking stupid.

You're flying and your toy bag (BDSMers understand completely) is chosen for a random check? Try explaining THAT one.

You're singing along with one of your favorite songs when some asshole turns the music down and it's suddenly karaoke spotlight.

You mistake Lysol for spray-on deodorant?

Nice, the cat has a new toy. Now you know what happened to that condom. So does your mother in law.

You look at your watch and then have no idea what time it is?

Go into a room to do or get something, then forget what it is you wanted?

Fart in church? Loudly. This also works in any other somber or crowded situation. Double points if it's a funeral. Quadruple points if it's YOUR funeral.

Someone comes up with an insult that's not only witty but there's no possible way for you to counter it.

Some jackass asks if you're okay after you've fallen or gotten hurt. Do I look okay to you, imbecile?

Your cat yarks and you find it by stepping in it. Triple points if it's in your shoe.

Your car runs out of gas on the way to work? A meeting? A date? A court date?

The dog cops a squat under the table during dinner? Triple points for Thanksgiving.

Your kid has to explain a vague sexual reference to you.

You're having great sex when your child runs into the room, asking if you're okay.

Tala · 05-09-2005, 01:05 PM

**Note: it has been tweaked slightly to make it more up to date. If you have some you'd like to add, please do.

Homer · 05-09-2005, 01:06 PM

I hate it all

sickkittens · 05-09-2005, 01:10 PM

You look at your watch and then have no idea what time it is?

Go into a room to do or get something, then forget what it is you wanted?

Those two always happen.

2HousePlague · 05-09-2005, 01:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tala

You're having great sex when your child runs into the room, asking if you're okay.

LMAO -- this one happened to Lauren (she was the child --

), and ever since, whenever her mom stubs her toe, she gets an unwelcome flashback -- LOL.

j-

Tala · 05-09-2005, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2HousePlague

LMAO -- this one happened to Lauren (she was the child --

), and ever since, whenever her mom stubs her toe, she gets an unwelcome flashback -- LOL.

j-

Whoops!

gecko · 05-09-2005, 01:27 PM

Yes to all...

Raven · 05-09-2005, 04:50 PM

Thanks for the heads up, Tala...I needed that. Can't laugh too much in this lifetime!

reynold · 05-10-2005, 12:03 AM

"You're having great sex when your child runs into the room, asking if you're okay." this is really funny

Clicky_Bucks · 05-10-2005, 12:08 AM

Nothing is more entertaining reading on an internet messageboard then a forwarded email. Keep them coming! What's next, Bill Gates is giving away money!!?

05-09-2005, 01:04 PM	#1
Tala Fucked if I know Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Do you have a flag? Posts: 23,368	Don't you hate it when... Sorry, this is much like Loryn's post, but I thought I'd share. It came from a bit I did a long time ago in college, so here goes. Don't You Hate It When.... Here are some little things that we all share, collected by me to provide some semi-quality entertainment. Don't you hate it when.. Some dingdong asks if it's hot enough for you? What, ninety degrees in the shade and you're asking if I want it hotter? Buggar off. You can't find your glasses and they're on top of your head, and you only discover this because your kids are laughing at you. You're having to have a screaming conversation with someone at an industry gathering, (or any gathering), in order to be heard over the music, then the music abruptly pauses right when you're saying something along the lines of, "Yeah, had to get an elephant-sized dildo!" Suddenly you're the life of the party. Cheers. You meet the man of your dreams and everything is going deliciously well when your husband calls. (This also works the opposite way for the men.) Some nitwit says, "Hey, can I ask ya something?" Guess what, sparky, you just did. Game over. You're going down a flight of stairs and think there's an extra step there but there's not? Suddenly you seem to be three inches shorter. This also counts for going up the stairs, except you just end up looking stupid. You're flying and your toy bag (BDSMers understand completely) is chosen for a random check? Try explaining THAT one. You're singing along with one of your favorite songs when some asshole turns the music down and it's suddenly karaoke spotlight. You mistake Lysol for spray-on deodorant? Nice, the cat has a new toy. Now you know what happened to that condom. So does your mother in law. You look at your watch and then have no idea what time it is? Go into a room to do or get something, then forget what it is you wanted? Fart in church? Loudly. This also works in any other somber or crowded situation. Double points if it's a funeral. Quadruple points if it's YOUR funeral. Someone comes up with an insult that's not only witty but there's no possible way for you to counter it. Some jackass asks if you're okay after you've fallen or gotten hurt. Do I look okay to you, imbecile? Your cat yarks and you find it by stepping in it. Triple points if it's in your shoe. Your car runs out of gas on the way to work? A meeting? A date? A court date? The dog cops a squat under the table during dinner? Triple points for Thanksgiving. Your kid has to explain a vague sexual reference to you. You're having great sex when your child runs into the room, asking if you're okay. __________________ ICQ: 11120676 \| Google: mindcrime \| Skype: suitemindcrime\|E-Mail: mindcrime AT gmail.com\|PR girl with great writing skills for hire!!!! Contact me to work for YOU!\|TECHIEMEDIA? 24/7 support from some of the best techs in the biz. Tell Jim that I sent you.

05-09-2005, 01:05 PM	#2
Tala Fucked if I know Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Do you have a flag? Posts: 23,368	**Note: it has been tweaked slightly to make it more up to date. If you have some you'd like to add, please do. __________________ ICQ: 11120676 \| Google: mindcrime \| Skype: suitemindcrime\|E-Mail: mindcrime AT gmail.com\|PR girl with great writing skills for hire!!!! Contact me to work for YOU!\|TECHIEMEDIA? 24/7 support from some of the best techs in the biz. Tell Jim that I sent you.

05-09-2005, 01:06 PM	#3
Homer Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 6,780	I hate it all __________________

05-09-2005, 01:10 PM	#4
sickkittens I am a meat popsicle. Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 25,100	You look at your watch and then have no idea what time it is? Go into a room to do or get something, then forget what it is you wanted? Those two always happen. __________________ HIGHEST PAYOUTS FOR NO-CONSOLE TOURS IN THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY! THIS SIG CAN BE YOURS FOR $200 - ICQ: 78881543

05-09-2005, 01:27 PM	#7
gecko ****** Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 21,846	Yes to all... __________________ [email protected]

05-09-2005, 04:50 PM	#8
Raven Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 6,874	Thanks for the heads up, Tala...I needed that. Can't laugh too much in this lifetime! __________________ Raven ~RETIRED~

05-10-2005, 12:03 AM	#9
reynold Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Global Traveler Posts: 51,271	"You're having great sex when your child runs into the room, asking if you're okay." this is really funny

05-10-2005, 12:08 AM	#10
Clicky_Bucks Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Hawaii Posts: 746	Nothing is more entertaining reading on an internet messageboard then a forwarded email. Keep them coming! What's next, Bill Gates is giving away money!!?